Bad breakup and weight loss

[DianeJarrett 155]

Hi everyone! Here's a new twist on an old subject matter - a bad breakup. I was happy, healthy, losing weight and working out. I had lost a solid 67 lbs since my June 14 surgery, had a great boyfriend and was really doing well.

Then, on December 26, my BF and I broke up. It was sudden and I was absolutely blindsided. I moved out of his apartment and moved in with my bestie and her husband in CT, away from my job (which I lost), my neighborhood, everything that I know.

The old Diane would be drowning her sorrows in Ben and Jerry's, crying and eating. The new Diane? She can't do that. She can't even eat ice cream because post surgery, she is lactose intolerant. She can't eat chips and dip, or go to McDonalds and get fries and a shake, she can't eat a lot of sweets, she can't drown her sorrows in food, she can't eat her emotions. And, she can't drink alcohol, because she's a freaking lightweight again, like a 14 year old girl at her first kegger.

Damn it.

But here's the good thing - the new Diane went to the gym and decided to get serious about working out. She is pushing herself harder than ever. She goes for an hour a day and REALLY works out, climbs the Stair Mill, takes a class, does 200 squats in the evening, does a lot of cardio. Why? Because she's in pain and needs to channel that pain somehow and also because SHE CANNOT EAT HER FEELINGS.

Why am I telling you this? Because I want you all to know how your relationship with food will change once you have this surgery. You learn to channel your emotions differently, you learn that food is not always the answer, you learn that alcohol won't solve your problems. Food and drink change post surgery. You have to learn to deal with your emotions instead of running to your comfort food or drink. And it sucks. It sucks big time.

Instead of gaining the post breakup 10 lbs that I normally do, I've lost 10 pounds. Maybe too much for me to lose in a couple of weeks. I had no appetite and I struggled to eat. But better to lose than to gain, to overeat, to push my stomach to full over and over again. I couldn't do it.

So I'm now 20 lbs to goal instead of 30, and I've lost 218 lbs too (that's how much my BF weighed). He was a good guy and I will miss him, but things happen for a reason. And this was a good lesson for me to learn.. how to deal with strong emotions without the comfort of food.

I think we all know that food isn't always our friend. We need it, but we don't need to be dependent upon it to get through some tough times. I am still crushed and hurt, and I miss him, but I really don't miss the food hangover that goes along with a bad breakup. Silver linings....

[orionburn 1,024]

Sorry to hear the bad news on the relationship woes, but congrats on staying upbeat and not trying to find a way to get into old/bad habits. Best wishes on your future!

[SouthernGirl76 74]

My hero! (She-ro?). I’m sorry about your break up but knowing that you channeled that anger and hurt and still triumphed is inspirational.

[NewBeginnings2018 81]

Wow!! Good for you girl! His loss!

[Sosewsue61 3,185]

Sorry for your breakup. Sometimes you just can't find the reason as it's happening. I hope you find a new job and make new friends. Keep going strong.

[DianeJarrett 155]

1 hour ago, Sosewsue61 said:

Sorry for your breakup. Sometimes you just can't find the reason as it's happening. I hope you find a new job and make new friends. Keep going strong.

Thanks. I appreciate that.

[_Kate_ 2,224]

So proud of you ! 🙂

[linda8 51]

You sound amazing. He must be a Moron!

[FluffyChix 17,415]

3 hours ago, linda8 said:

You sound amazing. He must be a Moron!

This!!! God has someone planned for you. I truly believe this, so keep your heart open and process the grief of both (3) losses! Hope you find a new job soon!

[Danny Paul 761]

Wow, what a strong willed person . An inspiration for many of us who want to see the successes. With your positivity Im sure that you will do well in your future endeavors .

Sent from my SM-T350 using BariatricPal mobile app

[Creekimp13 5,840]

Love, love, love your attitude and honesty. Great post:)

[OriginalGaPeach 28]

Hi everyone! Here's a new twist on an old subject matter - a bad breakup. I was happy, healthy, losing weight and working out. I had lost a solid 67 lbs since my June 14 surgery, had a great boyfriend and was really doing well.
Then, on December 26, my BF and I broke up. It was sudden and I was absolutely blindsided. I moved out of his apartment and moved in with my bestie and her husband in CT, away from my job (which I lost), my neighborhood, everything that I know.
The old Diane would be drowning her sorrows in Ben and Jerry's, crying and eating. The new Diane? She can't do that. She can't even eat ice cream because post surgery, she is lactose intolerant. She can't eat chips and dip, or go to McDonalds and get fries and a shake, she can't eat a lot of sweets, she can't drown her sorrows in food, she can't eat her emotions. And, she can't drink alcohol, because she's a freaking lightweight again, like a 14 year old girl at her first kegger.
Damn it.
But here's the good thing - the new Diane went to the gym and decided to get serious about working out. She is pushing herself harder than ever. She goes for an hour a day and REALLY works out, climbs the Stair Mill, takes a class, does 200 squats in the evening, does a lot of cardio. Why? Because she's in pain and needs to channel that pain somehow and also because SHE CANNOT EAT HER FEELINGS.
Why am I telling you this? Because I want you all to know how your relationship with food will change once you have this surgery. You learn to channel your emotions differently, you learn that food is not always the answer, you learn that alcohol won't solve your problems. Food and drink change post surgery. You have to learn to deal with your emotions instead of running to your comfort food or drink. And it sucks. It sucks big time.
Instead of gaining the post breakup 10 lbs that I normally do, I've lost 10 pounds. Maybe too much for me to lose in a couple of weeks. I had no appetite and I struggled to eat. But better to lose than to gain, to overeat, to push my stomach to full over and over again. I couldn't do it.
So I'm now 20 lbs to goal instead of 30, and I've lost 218 lbs too (that's how much my BF weighed). He was a good guy and I will miss him, but things happen for a reason. And this was a good lesson for me to learn.. how to deal with strong emotions without the comfort of food.
I think we all know that food isn't always our friend. We need it, but we don't need to be dependent upon it to get through some tough times. I am still crushed and hurt, and I miss him, but I really don't miss the food hangover that goes along with a bad breakup. Silver linings....

I truly appreciate your Raw testimony. I am within my 1st week of Post Op, and I needed this.[emoji18]

Live...Love...Laugh [emoji3]

[Swimmer 199]

This is so true. It's a beautiful moment when you realize that relationship with food changed for the positive. Good for you, your positive attitude and good habits. They will all take you far in your new journey. Best wishes