Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

How to tell a loved one you plan to get WLS?



Recommended Posts

My suggestion would be to be prepared to answer questions and reassure them that this is the best option for you. You might be pleasantly surprised.

I did not keep this a secret from anyone. I told everyone of any importance in my life and almost everyone has been amazingly supportive. My husband was a bit skeptical at first but once i explained it to him and he read some literature on it he has been totally on board. The only person who has been negative was my father in law and I just ignored him (he is always so negative anyway).

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, VSGnewguy said:

I had my wife pick one up and pointed out that I am carrying around more than 3 of those in extra weight

I know. Bags of juicing oranges in Australia are 3kg (6.7 pounds) and usually contain 15 medium oranges.

In July, I separated 33 bags to one side of the display for my 11 year old grandson ... "That's how much I have to lose, Mitchell ... nearly 500 oranges!"

Started at 174.6kg [nearly 385 pounds] ... future goal is 74.6kg [or 164.5 pounds]. That's 495 seven-ounce oranges to lose!

GOOD NEWS: I am currently 153 oranges lighter already ... in 136 days!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I haven't told anyone I felt wouldn't be supportive. I am now post op and my on-off boyfriend still does not know, my dad does not know and no one in my extended family knows. I told my closest friends(one friend had the gastric balloon and inspired my journey so that was nice.) Other than that only my brothers and my mom know. I have polycystic ovary syndrome and delayed gastric emptying so when my coworkers ask I plan to tell them I am on hormonal pills and I told them I had reproductive surgery(that really gets people to shut up!) I feel it is no one business until I am ready to tell them. What I do plan on telling my dad eventually is, "I made this decision completely by myself because I was unhappy and unhealthy. I mentioned it to you and you were against the idea so I chose not to tell you. I only wanted people who would completely support me to know, but I did always plan on telling you. I'm sorry if my keeping this from you hurts you but ultimately this is my body and my choice and I would love your support now. This was completely about me and I honestly was not interested in letting anyone talk me out of it"

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My diabetologist kept suggestion the surgery and gave me the info for the clinic. I went home and told my partner about it. I also told him that I didn't know yet if I'd do it, but I'd make an appointment for a consultation at the clinic.

The night before I left we had a long talk about it, he had a bunch of questions that I could answer already because I hate not being thoroughly informed to know what I need to ask the doctors. He said to me that this is my body and I should do what feels right for me. He loves me for me and will support me either way. I think the thing that made me realize how serious it is was when he said: "I want to grow old with you, any way you need to get there is worth seriously thinking about."

He's been supportive all the way, he reminds me of getting used to new habits like eating slowly, chewing more, not drinking during eating, as a preparation for post-OP but also because it's healthier. He was the very first I told about because this change will be something we both have to be in for. I can't do it without him having my back. Well, I could but it would be a LOT harder.

My parents know and my friends know. I wrote a blog about it, so my readers know too. Grabbing support where ever you can get it, right?

So talk with your husband, if writing a letter is easier for you than vocally talking, do that. Sometimes it's easier to do that, to be able to sort out what is going on in your mind and to structure your arguments. In the end, it is YOUR body. His support would be fantastic. He does want you around for a long time after all, right?

You can do it, keep at it!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • LadyVeteran1

      Sleeve surgery is on April 14th.  I am counting the days!!  Can't wait!
      · 1 reply
      1. Brookie2shoes

        Me too girl!! Are you in the full liquid diet right now? It’s sooooo hard!

    • buildabetteranna

      Down 33 lbs and slightly stalled, but I'm gonna reevaluate and push through. I started back to work last week after 2 years of being disabled due to mental health as well as my weight. It's a great job and I'm just so happy to have this opportunity at a second chance at life. Hope everyone is having their best journey ❤️ Together, we got this!
      · 2 replies
      1. DaisyChainOz

        Great work Anna! Keep it up 😁

      2. buildabetteranna

        Thank you ❤️

    • Bashbee91

      Hey guys new to the process looking forward to this new life. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Bugg

      Hi everyone! I’m brand new here. I just went through all my pre-op requirements per my insurance company and now everything has been submitted and I’m just waiting for final approval and my surgery date. I’ve been doing research, watching YouTube videos, TikTok’s, ect.. trying to prepare my mind and what to expect so I’ll be ready for the surgery. I was so sure and so set and so ready and excited. However, now that I’ve done everything & it’s almost here, I am sooooooo scared! I know why I want it bc I’ve tried everything and I just don’t feel like I can lose weight by myself. I’m tired of being overweight my entire life. I’m miserable, but I keep psyching myself out afraid of GERD bc I know how that can be and I don’t want to have to get a bypass after already gaining the courage to even get VSG. I’m scared of complications like I’mgoing to regret doing it and be depressed that I didn’t just be more disciplined and try again to lose the weight on my own even sitting here typing this knowing in my mind i just can’t and don’t possess the discipline. I’m also afraid I won’t be able to handle the restrictions of the sleeve. What do I eat? I don’t know how to eat healthy really and don’t enjoy healthy food. I don’t know how to do this! I feel so defeated!Someone tell me they felt anything similar to this or am I not ready? I thought I was. I am so tired of being sick and tired and so tired of myself and so tired of being stuck and stuck in this body and somebody different on the outside from what I feel inside. I just want to ball up and cry.
      · 1 reply
      1. stevieoriole

        Am feeling this right now. My surgery date is 4/1. Sign the consent tomorrow. I feel like I overloaded myself with too much info, too many opinions. Got to the point where I was wondering if I should do this. Then I thought of my reasons for taking this step and that settled my nerves. Still get moments of doubt but am striving forward. Am just going to follow my book from the surgeon. Joined this because I was told by my dietician that I should do this for support

    • buildabetteranna

      over 20 lbs down since4 the pre surgery diet and surgery on the 14th
      · 1 reply
      1. Selina333

        Yay!! Congrats. I know how good that feels. 🤩

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×