why do people assume

[jesslynn32288 7]

I have been overweight my whole life. I was never a small girl always felt like i wasn't good enough. after for kids i have been stuck between 280 and 245 currently im 249 dont know how i have been eating horrible. i did my seminar now just waiting on the consultation. so my boyfriend and best-friend are freaking out saying with my blood clot disorder im putting myself in danger. They have said im taking the easy way out. i have dieted for years tried so many things and failed. why do people say this is the easy way out surgery is a serious thing.

[etc. etc. etc. 440]

People are ignorant. This is not easy AT ALL. Read the forums.

People judge fat people. They only want them to get better if it comes through a crucible of tremendous shame and suffering.

%$#@ that. Get healthy.

[Sosewsue61 3,185]

People are azzhats. It's the same with depression, if you have never truly battled it people always say - 'get over it, do something', like that helps - gee I didn't know that's all it takes to fix it <sarcasm>. They believe the media rhetoric about just eat less and exercise, it's more complicated than that.

[Introversion 1,876]

Well, for me, this was the easy way out...

I'm in my mid 30s. Through yo-yo dieting I've lost and regained 200+ pounds over the past 2 decades (e.g., lose 30, regain 50, lose 60, regain 100, lose 50, regain 90, rinse/repeat).

I could lose a lot of weight, but could never keep it off. As soon as I reached a normal weight range my body fought like hell to fatten up again. Every single time.

Yo-yo dieting is hard. Losing weight the old-fashioned way is hard. Regaining massive amounts of weight over and over again is hard on the body and crushes the spirit.

But weight loss surgery? Yes, it's been my easy way out. Others may feel differently.

Other than post-op soreness and fatigue, surgery has been far easier than doing it the traditional way. It's also easier to keep the weight off, which is what matters. I'm nearly 3 years out with no regrets.

[fruitandveggies 456]

I agree with Introversion, this is SO much easier than any other way I've tried to lose weight. There have been difficulties sure, but overall it has been much, much easier than the rest of my weight loss life.

The real question is, why wouldn't people WANT the easy way for you? Why would our loved ones want us to suffer through the "hard way"? Like it's inherently bad for things to be easy? Why is easy equated with evil?

[Healthy_life2 8,324]

1 hour ago, jesslynn32288 said:

I have been overweight my whole life. I was never a small girl always felt like i wasn't good enough. after for kids i have been stuck between 280 and 245 currently im 249 dont know how i have been eating horrible. i did my seminar now just waiting on the consultation. so my boyfriend and best-friend are freaking out saying with my blood clot disorder im putting myself in danger. They have said im taking the easy way out. i have dieted for years tried so many things and failed. why do people say this is the easy way out surgery is a serious thing.

It's ok for people around you to be concerned about any major surgery. Reassure them you are going to be ok and health is your priority.

Yep, the easy way out is a common comment when people think bariatric surgery. Just rise above any negativity and press on with your decisions in life.

Any major change in life takes work. I weighed and log my food, learn how to properly fuel my body, got serious about exercise, Most of the work I have done is the mental/ behavioral side of weight loss. I had overcome my negative self talk. deal with poor body image about my weight and stress/emotional eating.

All of the work was absolutely worth getting my health and my life back.

[PJ1959 12]

4 hours ago, jesslynn32288 said:

so my boyfriend and best-friend are freaking out saying with my blood clot disorder im putting myself in danger.

I just had my sleeve done 11/24/2017. Thought I would respond and let you know some of my circumstances. I was actually supposed to have it done 11/22/17 but unfortunately, when I got to the hospital on my surgery date of 11/22/17, I was in atrial fibrillation with a high heart rate and low blood pressure. People with AFIB also have a danger of blood clots and stroke. I had discontinued my blood thinner 5 days before, in fact. Luckily, I had a bariatric surgeon who was willing to keep me in the hospital and get me out of AFIB, and then I was able to go ahead and have my surgery on Friday, 11/24/17. which I pulled through like a champ. I'm betting you will too. Good Luck!

[VooLivre2017 79]

I have been overweight my whole life. I was never a small girl always felt like i wasn't good enough. after for kids i have been stuck between 280 and 245 currently im 249 dont know how i have been eating horrible. i did my seminar now just waiting on the consultation. so my boyfriend and best-friend are freaking out saying with my blood clot disorder im putting myself in danger. They have said im taking the easy way out. i have dieted for years tried so many things and failed. why do people say this is the easy way out surgery is a serious thing.

I don’t know about the medical issues you might have so talk to your doc. A lot will change after surgery. This is not to be taken lightly but not everyone is gonna be supportive and you have to be ready for that.

So I heard the same nonsense about the “easy way out”.... from other friends who struggle with weight and those who don’t. Most people do not dare, but I’ve had rude people point blank ask. If I feel like being nice I say, “I think you want to tell me that I look happy. I am! So much good going on in my life right now & I feel great. Thanks.”

I was the kinda person who was always agreeable, answered every question people ask. Well now I don’t do anything if I don’t want to. That’s the boldness I’ve gained from this new journey and it’s huge. I’m still loveable but just have better boundaries and it’s noted. I believe some are jealous of the confidence and joy for life you gain from being free of the weight. You change and others don’t like it.

[summerset 5,265]

20 hours ago, fruitandveggies said:

I agree with Introversion, this is SO much easier than any other way I've tried to lose weight. There have been difficulties sure, but overall it has been much, much easier than the rest of my weight loss life.

This. Both losing and maintaining is finally possible without that much hassle. I'd say the "normal" amount of vigilance a lot of other people who were never fat have to use is necessary to not gain at the moment.

Quote

The real question is, why wouldn't people WANT the easy way for you? Why would our loved ones want us to suffer through the "hard way"? Like it's inherently bad for things to be easy? Why is easy equated with evil?

Because fat people need to be punished and need to suffer - at least this is what a lot of people seem to be thinking.

Others might be thinking "I need a lot of discipline to battle my weight, too - why should you have it any easier?" which boils down to naked envy.

Edited December 29, 2017 by summerset

[abefroman329 704]

I heard a lot from my family about a (now-ex) family friend who had gastric bypass surgery many years ago and how she took the easy way out. F*ck them. Look at some of my surgeon’s pre-surgery requirements:

A psych evaluation - not easy

Getting your sleep apnea under control - not always easy

Getting your A1C below 7 - very, very hard for some people

Doesn’t sound like the easy way any more, does it?

[Diahanna 9]

Next time somebody tells you that you took the easy way out, you just tell them, "As Frank Sinatra said, I did it my way." [emoji4]

[Losebig 508]

It is kind of funny.. If you had cancer and there was a treatment that worked, would people say "they took the easy way out" and be negative about it? Cancer is probably somewhat out of people's control - but what about smoking?

Weight at the level where you're getting surgery is a disease / addiction and if surgery is an easy way out (at this point I don't currently believe there's much 'easy' about it so far) - then why the heck wouldn't we be pushing people to do it and supporting them. Any way out of a life threatening disease is a good thing, if surgery makes it easier then everyone should be super supportive. For whatever reason there's a pretty big trend around looking down on fat people and some sense that they're weak willed or whatever.

Luckily for me I'm not worried about what anyone else thinks and want to use whatever tool is going to work best long term to help me be and stay healthy.

[TakingABreak 2,733]

This is why I’m not telling but a select group of people. But while I agree that it is probably a heck of a lot easier to do than regular dieting and exercise, I also think that the journey to get there is a rough one. I’ve had to change so much. Although I also had really bad bad habits. Each person is different.
Good luck and everyone will forget how you got there once they can’t imagine you the way you were.