Have you experienced jealousy?

[Apple1 2,572]

11 hours ago, Introversion said:

My friend's various family members have commented (never in my presence) that I'm "too skinny" and lost too much weight.

I have had a couple of people actually tell me this to my face, and yes they were overweight themselves. I just smile and say I am barely at a healthy BMI and let them know that I feel better then I have in years and change the subject.

[kandywolf 161]

I have to admit, that even though a few people have said they envy me and how far I have come, they have NEVER EVER cut me down. Most are church family, but also family and friends. I have some family members who never have a nice thing to say, so I just disregard them. They are uplifting and tell me I am doing a great job and to keep up the good work. Tell me how good I look, and how proud they are of me. It IS nice to hear those compliments, but do not let the haters bring you down. I do admit, my friend who had the gastric sleeve surgery 4 years ago, did look a little too skinny. I do think it was only because I had never seen her that skinny! I was a tad jealous, not going to lie, although I didnt know her before the sleeve, only saw pictures, but when I met her, she was steadily losing. 4 years and she had maintained at 155. I have heard a lot of people say a lot of negative things. Usually it is their own insecurities that they are trying to hide. To me she is a true inspiration. I may never be 155 lbs. and I am ok with that! I havent been under 200 since 1999/2000. So I would be happy at 199!
You are going to do a great job! Keep your head up!
Ladies, let the haters hate, as they are leaving someone else alone! Congratulations and great job! You all are a HUGE inspiration to me!

[Sullie06 1,013]

The only real issue I've found relating to jealousy is my best friend and it's not outward, it's something I can just read. She was always thin until about 19 and then she started to gain some weight and then she had her son when she was 27, put on a ton of weight during the pregnancy and then her son ended up in the NICU because he was premature and she has been stuck with the weight sense. When I made the decision to do this surgery she was not very fond of the idea and then when I started losing weight she started acting weird. She doesn't come around as much, when we are out in public she doesn't stand near me anymore and she makes little comments like calling me "Skinny" or "Slim" or saying things like "Oh didn't see you standing there you so small now". She never comes out to say anything directly but I know her and I know she's jealous.

[Joann454 1,329]

I’ve not noticed any jealousy. But I also do t feel I’ve lost enough weight yet to have experienced it. Most everyone in my life is incredibly supportive. Either that or I’m blind to it. Either way I haven’t noticed.

[MochaKelly 74]

Had the same thing occur with a friend of 20+ years. She has even sunken to the low of fabricating a story that she has recently had the surgery. However, she doesn't have any of the habits that wls patients have.lol She went to Cracker Barrel for a kid's meal, (10 days after "surgery"), which was coincidentally was my first meal, although I had been sleeved and released from the hospital after a month. Does that even sound real? I don't know her issue and have no time to figure it out, so I have resolved to let her do her "journey" while I continue mine. #Unbothered

Sent from my Moto Z2 Play using BariatricPal mobile app

[Hop_Scotch 1,633]

2 hours ago, MochaKelly said:

Had the same thing occur with a friend of 20+ years. She has even sunken to the low of fabricating a story that she has recently had the surgery. However, she doesn't have any of the habits that wls patients have

Ask to compare surgery scars

[redhead_che 824]

My mom, yes. Had the surgery many years ago and has kept 100lbs off, but still fights to lose more. It’s just nit picky comments I mostly ignore. I let it irk me for a second and move on.

theres also a lady at work that had a weight loss surgery that is very nice to my face, but behind my back makes comments about how little I eat and “I’m not doing it the right way” yeah ok...is eating food trucks every day the right way? 🙄

[Gundy 139]

Although I only told a few people about WLS, I did tell a dear friend who almost qualified for the surgery herself but couldn’t be bothered with all the Dietician visits. Numerous members of her family also had WLS so it was nice talking to her about their journeys.

Immediately after surgery, she asked frequently how I was doing. She doesn’t ask any longer. Once I made it below 200, I told her excitedly. She then said she did the same thing when she was on weight watchers 20 years ago. Burn!! After that I just don’t mention anything about the surgery or weight loss. Unless she asks, I just decided not to mention anything since I know it is hard for her to hear. It is fine, however!

[Frustr8 7,886]

I want to look,people,in their face and say Envious of Me? Why would you be? Let's quote chapter and verse on this one, if I am so dadgum wonderful let me in on the secret because tiday,i don't see it myself.

[Frustr8 7,886]

So how are you and the Green eyed envy Mobster doing b today?

[wjgo 272]

I am afraid to evoke envy. I just joined a fencing group, and the instructor was trying to figure out my size in case I wanted to get in on a group order for protective gear. I was the only overweight person there, and the oldest by 20 years at least and I was open about my surgery and that I am still loosing weight and would wait until I stabilized because bigger sizes is just more loose paddings to love around in. Now, a few classes later, other regular members are showing up, that perhaps could use a weight loss program or surgery, and I just don't want to discuss it, because in the sport, just being overweight brings your performance level lower.

Sent from my XT1609 using BariatricPal mobile app

[BarrySue 602]

Everyone in my life has been really supportive, but honestly, most of them have no idea I had surgery. If I did, I definitely feel like there would be a lot of negative feelings. I was always a pretty big b***h, with a lot of hard edges and walls up due to my insecurities. Wirth the weight loss, I've definitely softened up and learned that it's okay to be vulnerable/less defensive. I think that's why I haven't dealt much with jealousy -- folks are more relieved I'm becoming a decent human being who cares for others instead of lashing out.