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My first official R&R...Bandsters who dont know a damn thing about banding



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Someone posted about mucus on the complications forum yesterday so I added my piece. I also posted on two other forums. I wouldn't mind seeing my surgeon, since I have a bit of a crush on him.

Yes...you also go to a Dr. McDreamy eh? :love:

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:bounce::bounce:

I refuse to play with my band. I'm in this for the long haul. I can just see my surgeon writing in one of his research journals about me. The never filled bandster that slipped. That won't be me.

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Now see, I'm in a different school. To me, a PB and vomit are totally different. I don't equate what gets lodged in the stoma to contents of the stomach. This is one that actually bugs me, because if someone posts that they've PBed, and posts that they've vomitted, I'm thinking different things and likely to give very different advice. E.g., chewing better, eating more slowly, etc. won't necessarily do crap for vomitting, but can help with a lot of PB issues.

I will agree that "PB" is stupid. I've never had a burp hurt or make me yak up Shampoo lather. But I can't comfortably call it vomit, either.

We need a new term!

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Now see, I'm in a different school. To me, a PB and vomit are totally different. I don't equate what gets lodged in the stoma to contents of the stomach. This is one that actually bugs me, because if someone posts that they've PBed, and posts that they've vomitted, I'm thinking different things and likely to give very different advice. E.g., chewing better, eating more slowly, etc. won't necessarily do crap for vomitting, but can help with a lot of PB issues.

I will agree that "PB" is stupid. I've never had a burp hurt or make me yak up Shampoo lather. But I can't comfortably call it vomit, either.

We need a new term!

I think there is a PB but not what people think of as a PB.

Ever drink a huge glass of Water with tight restriction, you burp, and Water comes flying out your mouth? I can see how that is a PB. It's still a stupid term but I can see that being a PB.

How about a pouch barf and a full barf? :rolleyes:

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Now see, I'm in a different school. To me, a PB and vomit are totally different. I don't equate what gets lodged in the stoma to contents of the stomach. This is one that actually bugs me, because if someone posts that they've PBed, and posts that they've vomitted, I'm thinking different things and likely to give very different advice. E.g., chewing better, eating more slowly, etc. won't necessarily do crap for vomitting, but can help with a lot of PB issues.

I will agree that "PB" is stupid. I've never had a burp hurt or make me yak up Shampoo lather. But I can't comfortably call it vomit, either.

We need a new term!

How about pouch puke, stoma slushie, or above the band yak...

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Yak works for me! (I've used it many times) Whomever coined "pb" should be... PBed on! Stoma slushie - that's pretty good. Stoma shot... Band barf... hmm... I see a contest in the future!

Ok guys, how about this:

1. No, I can't tell you which WLS to get.

2. No, exercise isn't going to fix my scrotum-looking upper arms, or yours.

3. Yes, someone else has experienced it, whatever "it" is.

4. No, I don't know if you're going to need PS.

5. No, you're not in starvation mode.

6. No, I don't know if your band has slipped 6 hours post-op.

7. Yes, I've heared of it, whatever "it" is.

Or, better yet, let me reincarnate a "thread killers" post I made a while ago:

Here's mine... *gets into character*:

i had surgery one month ago now everytime i eat my eyes and ears and butt and fingers bleed this only happens when i eat and then i go puke it all back up and i puke up blood and some chunks of body tissue and something that looks like gray spaghetti oh and one time a sock but that was just a week after surgery so i figured the surgeon musta left it in there and one time i peed and it was bloody and had hair in it and something that looked like a lego... and then usually after i poo or pee i pass out but i always regain consciousness within like 4 hours or so im never unconscious for more than 4 hours but when i wake up usually im blind for a few more hours and i cant feel my fingers or toes and im kind of dizzy and cant walk for a few days but after maybe a week or two i feel back to normal and the bleeding stops does anyone else have these symptoms? what is it? should i take pepto bismol?

What kills a thread for me is total absence of common sense. I have no problem meeting someone halfway, hell - I'll even go 70%, but come on - you have to show you're at least trying.

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Yak works for me! (I've used it many times) Whomever coined "pb" should be... PBed on! Stoma slushie - that's pretty good. Stoma shot... Band barf... hmm... I see a contest in the future!

Ok guys, how about this:

1. No, I can't tell you which WLS to get.

2. No, exercise isn't going to fix my scrotum-looking upper arms, or yours.

3. Yes, someone else has experienced it, whatever "it" is.

4. No, I don't know if you're going to need PS.

5. No, you're not in starvation mode.

6. No, I don't know if your band has slipped 6 hours post-op.

7. Yes, I've heared of it, whatever "it" is.

Or, better yet, let me reincarnate a "thread killers" post I made a while ago:

You forgot a few.

Yes, I know you are hungry on Clear liquids. You'll live.

Just tell me you are constipated, I don't need details of what *your* poop looks like or hard hard you have to push to get it out.

If the color of your poop bothers you, might I suggest not looking at it?

No, I don't know which Protein shake you will prefer.

What can you have week two of your post op diet? May I see your written instructions? Then I can let you know.

No, your doctor is not perfect and I'm tired of hearing how perfect he is. I know better.

Yes, exercise helps weight loss.

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I think there is a PB but not what people think of as a PB.

Ever drink a huge glass of Water with tight restriction, you burp, and Water comes flying out your mouth? I can see how that is a PB. It's still a stupid term but I can see that being a PB.

How about a pouch barf and a full barf? :rolleyes:

I vote for BB - Bandster barf

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You forgot a few.

Yes, I know you are hungry on Clear Liquids. You'll live.

Just tell me you are constipated, I don't need details of what *your* poop looks like or hard hard you have to push to get it out.

If the color of your poop bothers you, might I suggest not looking at it?

No, I don't know which Protein shake you will prefer.

What can you have week two of your post op diet? May I see your written instructions? Then I can let you know.

No, your doctor is not perfect and I'm tired of hearing how perfect he is. I know better.

Yes, exercise helps weight loss.

Can we fit all of yours and Wheets in our sig line?

adding...

No I dont regret this surgery or wish I had RNY, your first fill wont work, you have permission to hate your skinny NUT, dont ask me when you can start having sex again..do you have a partner?

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Can we fit all of yours and Wheets in our sig line?

adding...

No I dont regret this surgery or wish I had RNY, your first fill wont work, you have permission to hate your skinny NUT, dont ask me when you can start having sex again..do you have a partner?

Ohhh, don't forget the, "It doesn't matter what position you have sex, your band won't unsnap."

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