This liquid diet is killing me

[DrGee 27]

I am sooooo not thinking scout carbs right now. This liquid diet is torture. Although I said a few posts ago that I was versatile with my liquid choices. I’m 13 days GLB post op and I want to sink my teeth into some food. I’m sooooo depressed right now. And please don’t tell me to hang I’m there. I don’t have a choice. I know that. All I know is that this is one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to endure in my entire life. I know what rock bottom feels like. All I want to do is watch tv just to keep my mind occupied, living vicariously thru the characters on the screen. I guess that’s what the next 4 weeks will be like...cooking scrumptious meals for my son and going to bed at 6 to excape the torture of knowing I can’t touch any of it. Sure, I’m 23 lbs lighter at this very moment I’m crying and miserable. PLEASE DONT RESPOND WITH A HANG IN THERE or IT GETS BETTER!!!

[mw2543 23]

2 hours ago, DrGee said:

I am sooooo not thinking scout carbs right now. This liquid diet is torture. Although I said a few posts ago that I was versatile with my liquid choices. I’m 13 days GLB post op and I want to sink my teeth into some food. I’m sooooo depressed right now. And please don’t tell me to hang I’m there. I don’t have a choice. I know that. All I know is that this is one of the hardest things I’ve ever had to endure in my entire life. I know what rock bottom feels like. All I want to do is watch tv just to keep my mind occupied, living vicariously thru the characters on the screen. I guess that’s what the next 4 weeks will be like...cooking scrumptious meals for my son and going to bed at 6 to excape the torture of knowing I can’t touch any of it. Sure, I’m 23 lbs lighter at this very moment I’m crying and miserable. PLEASE DONT RESPOND WITH A HANG IN THERE or IT GETS BETTER!!!

Stop and think about what you are thinking about. Replace those craving thoughts with something else. What works for me is reading or listening to positive music. Get creative. Stop watching tv commercials about food. Kids are growing they need food. We are not growing anymore. We are not supposed to be growing. Do gardening, fix up you house; paint draw sew play music get into charity work. Replace the time used for overeating with something creative. I am no expert and I haven’t had surgery yet. I havve done some research and I am concerned about this diet. Best thing to do is to picture those cravings and toss them into hell where they belong. Start a new life as a strong intelligent person who knows how to take care of herself. Amen.? I am hoping to practice what I preach. 😬❤️😀

[mw2543 23]

On 9/24/2017 at 4:24 PM, theresa_86 said:

I'm day three of 2 weeks. I'm about to go crazy! How do you guys do it with out cheating!?!? I'm praying I can make it without doing that.

Get busy so you dont think about it.

[mw2543 23]

I think we all need to renew our minds. Dont let negative or tempting thoughts rule us. We need to change or die. You can actually die frim the health problems that obesity causes. Please stop and let that sink in as you listen to your heart beat and your breath continue to flow. Just imagine what you will be able to do with better health. Overweight people like me are trapped on a cycle that cannot be broken. God is giving us help with this. Lets not go back to the old life. Its time to renew. Find hobbies. Get busy. Be the person that helps and not the person that needs help. Be grateful you have a second chance. Quit thinking about what you cant have and seek what yiu can. Be grateful be postive. Smile. Wake up and get busy. From my heart. ❤️

[BunnyJean 123]

On 9/30/2017 at 11:37 AM, mw2543 said:

I saw a bariatric patch Vitamin. I think I am going to order some. Is the hair loss from lack of certain Vitamins?

I asked the nurse in my life skills class about the patch Vitamins. She said they "meaning my group" have not done much research on them but felt that vitamins were better absorbed within the body instead of on skin. I'm still tempted to try, but....it's very important after surgery to get all your vitamins in and this is why we need to supplement. Since you won't have blood work done for at least a month or 3 months after surgery, I, frankly, don't want to make the mistake of using the patch and finding out it didn't work. And then be lacking in important vitamins that could be hard to catch up on. As far as Hair loss, from what I've read, it's pretty much unavoidable. The nurse in my class said some was anesthesia stress, but most was because your body is going from consuming many many calories and all of a sudden sooo many less calories. Your body thinks it's going into starvation mode (from our cave man days that we don't need anymore) so it is shutting down anything not necessary for survival. And one of those is hair. So it stops the growing phase and puts the hair in resting phase so it needs no nutrients. After the resting phase naturally comes the shedding phase. And then a growth phase starts again once the body adjusts. Seems the time for hair loss starts 3-7 months post op and slow regrowth. I have hormonal hair loss for 4 yrs at this point. So slim head of hair to begin with. My hairdresser may need to steer me in the direction of a wig! I'm not kidding on this! So....important....take your vitamins post op, make sure you are getting plenty of Protein. Most surgeons I think say 65 grams. Those that experienced hair loss shoot for 80 plus grams. Biotin is important. Some say zinc and Iron but I would only supplement those on advise of your dr. About the only Vitamin group you really can't overkill are the B's because they remove from the body fast. So if I do get a Vitamin Patch, it will be the B12 or B's if they have or Biotin. I will still supplement internally as well. See what my 3 month tests look like. Good luck to you!

[DrGee 27]

I really love my Bari family here. Last night really sucked for me. I ended up riding my elliptical and watching tv til it watched me. Everything u guys said was dead spot on but I’ll tell u something. When I’m in the throws of that misery and it’s got a hold on me like a newborn in a blanket, to shift my thoughts as y’all suggested is close to impossible. Luckily It typically hits me hardest at night and I can simply go to bed and eventually to sleep. Interestingly enough, I dream of eating my favorite food.

As a therapist myself, I know that to get thru it is to go thru it. There’s no testimony without test. I also know how this is actually my second chance at bat (I had gastric bypass in 2008). It’s these facts about my journey that tell my body (motor functions) and deep in my heart that cheating is not an option. My food addicted Mind (my brains pleasure center), on the other hand is what screams in agony. It’s sometimes physically draining for me. Luckily my education has taught me to understand this and that to let it out as I did in that post helps release a small bit of the stress. The rest, for me, is to vicariously live the lives or to become enthralled in the happening of television characters. Luckily it’s worst at night and this practice just seems to work out.

I hope this post helps someone who’s thinking about cheating on this journey. The battle between the “to do or not to do” is real. Everyday, every minute we beat that urge is a strike of accomplishment. ANYBODY that says we took the easy way out can kiss your ass for me too BC at the end of the day, only we as individuals know and live with our demons and what it takes to beat them. One day at a time.

[BunnyJean 123]

I agree with that easy way out comment. This will be the hardest thing I have done to help myself in my life. With the exception of getting out of an abusive home when I was much much much (too) young.

I don't know if you are on Clear Liquids or not but I have to tell you, this Protein Drink fills me the heck right up and it's so tasty that I'm not missing anything, even my sweets!! I put in my Ninja blender, Water, Fairfield 2% or lower milk, scoop Muscle Milk vanilla creme Protein Powder, serv size of PB2 (2 tablespoons!!! yum) and 1/2 a banana. The taste is AMAZING and the Protein is there, lower calories, low sugar...most sugar is in that 1/2 banana. I mix that sucker good...then add a good cup or more of ice, blend again. It's soooo frothy and good! I serve it to myself out of my favorite canning jar glass. It's like a party to me. I'm sipping on one right now. This is my Breakfast and it will take me right through lunch. I'm pre-sleeve....just practicing! I hope my tastes don't change where I don't like this anymore because seriously, I'm floating on cloud 9 drinking it. Give it a try. Hope it helps with the cravings? If it's the chewing, leave some ice not quite finished in it for some chewing. This is thick enough and tasty enough, might just do the trick for you. Good luck!!!

[FluffyChix 17,415]

@DrGee I was going to post almost your exact most recent post yesterday, but didn't want to be a buzzkill when you were clearly on a precipice and hurting.

I'm not post-op yet, so don't have the forging through fire of which you speak. I only have life experience of dealing with intensely challenging life situations, grief, and life experience with counseling, so am only qualified to give my opinion on getting through difficult/gruelling experiences from a personal perspective. As you said, the only way through it is through it. And the only way to get through it is to stay firmly grounded in reality and grounded in the present--sometimes that present is only 60seconds long. You know? Sometimes you're lucky and that present is a day. And then you start all over again the next day.

This is especially true for the "junkie brain" and "fat brain" which is fairly similar to junkie brain because of the pleasure center/dopamine/opiod receptor involvement. (I know I'm preachin' to the choir here, because of your training! ) It DOES help to lament. To gnash teeth. To wail. I felt that's what you were doing yesterday. And, that's ok. That's part of the grief process.

But as a professional, you know that having "tools" ready for a time of need, can make the difference between bending and breaking. So today, in the light of clarity, I would encourage you to re-evaluate your arsenal of psychological warfare tools and get them ready for the next time you are tested. I truly know first hand that they do help make us stronger. (BTW, I'm not being Polyanna here. I do understand that sometimes drugs are need to balance brain chemistry.)

For me, CBT (or my understanding of CBT) has been invaluable for dealing with addictions, grief, and depression. It honestly made the difference for me between suicide and living mostly depression-free. So when I'm in the metaphorical weeds, I remind myself of these things:

1. Stay focused on the present. Worry about tomorrow when it comes.

2. Choose to believe that this painful present will not last into infinity. It will end.

3. Choose to focus on the positive. (Flip a light switch to turn off the liar's voice that tells you that you are nearing the end and can't endure. It lies. It has one job and that's what it does--lies to us and makes us believe we're weak.)

4. When the liar light is "off," replace the liar with the light of truth: You ARE strong. You are powerful. You will get through this moment. The moment will end. Glom on to one positive element of the moment and believe. Visualize it. If it's scale movement, then imagine more movement. If it's a skinny, healthy you in ridiculous jeans and CFM heels, see yourself there. Imagine you are on the path to light, and mentally check off the "check point" called misery as you walk past it.

5. Remember to breathe. Four square breathing techniques.

6. Accept your mortality. I say a quote from the Sioux, "Today is a good day to die." It means, that if this is the situation that is going to kill me, then I am ready and it can only hurt a maximum of 4 minutes (without breathing) to die. It completely takes the power and bite out of that moment of anxiety because I relax into it.

7. Laugh. Picture myself as having power...the power to laugh through adversity.

8. Maintain a grateful heart. Acknowledge/count your blessings. Affirm the positives from the current day.

I truly believe that applying these tools, makes me better able to handle the hairy times. But it's like with any tool. The more you practice it, the more repetitions you do, the more you are able to use those tools accurately--with sure and swift aim--when they are needed. When I first started doing push ups against the counter, I could only do 3 without collapsing in burning agony across my chest and lat flaps (double mastectomy with bilateral lat flap recon). Now I can do 12 reps without the neuralgia burning and muscle fatigue. It's the same thing with your brain.

Arming yourself with powerful psychological tools won't mean you will never walk through the fire again. It won't mean you will never have tests, trials, or tribulations. It won't mean you won't have times of weakness, temptation, grief, lamentation, or sadness/depression. It only means that when those times come, you are stronger. We are a warriors. We are not a victim tossed about by an uncontrollable force. We have power and control over our success.

Just my 2 cents. It's not worth too much, so please feel free to ignore me. I think I read that you are a doctor of psychology, so none of this is new to you, but there may be someone else out there who is helped from this info...

Glad to hear that today is better and that you got through yesterday and can put it behind you--checking it off your list! ((hugs))

Edited October 4, 2017 by FluffyChix

[DropWt4Life 957]

12 minutes ago, FluffyChix said:

@DrGee I was going to post almost your exact most recent post yesterday, but didn't want to be a buzzkill when you were clearly on a precipice and hurting.

I'm not post-op yet, so don't have the forging through fire of which you speak. I only have life experience of dealing with intensely challenging life situations, grief, and life experience with counseling, so am only qualified to give my opinion on getting through difficult/gruelling experiences from a personal perspective. As you said, the only way through it is through it. And the only way to get through it is to stay firmly grounded in reality and grounded in the present--sometimes that present is only 60seconds long. You know? Sometimes you're lucky and that present is a day. And then you start all over again the next day.

This is especially true for the "junkie brain" and "fat brain" which is fairly similar to junkie brain because of the pleasure center/dopamine/opiod receptor involvement. (I know I'm preachin' to the choir here, because of your training! ) It DOES help to lament. To gnash teeth. To wail. I felt that's what you were doing yesterday. And, that's ok. That's part of the grief process.

But as a professional, you know that having "tools" ready for a time of need, can make the difference between bending and breaking. So today, in the light of clarity, I would encourage you to re-evaluate your arsenal of psychological warfare tools and get them ready for the next time you are tested. I truly know first hand that they do help make us stronger. (BTW, I'm not being Polyanna here. I do understand that sometimes drugs are need to balance brain chemistry.)

For me, CBT (or my understanding of CBT) has been invaluable for dealing with addictions, grief, and depression. It honestly made the difference for me between suicide and living mostly depression-free. So when I'm in the metaphorical weeds, I remind myself of these things:

1. Stay focused on the present. Worry about tomorrow when it comes.

2. Choose to believe that this painful present will not last into infinity. It will end.

3. Choose to focus on the positive. (Flip a light switch to turn off the liar's voice that tells you that you are nearing the end and can't endure. It lies. It has one job and that's what it does--lies to us and makes us believe we're weak.)

4. When the liar light is "off," replace the liar with the light of truth: You ARE strong. You are powerful. You will get through this moment. The moment will end. Glom on to one positive element of the moment and believe. Visualize it. If it's scale movement, then imagine more movement. If it's a skinny, healthy you in ridiculous jeans and CFM heels, see yourself there. Imagine you are on the path to light, and mentally check off the "check point" called misery as you walk past it.

5. Remember to breathe. Four square breathing techniques.

6. Accept your mortality. I say a quote from the Sioux, "Today is a good day to die." It means, that if this is the situation that is going to kill me, then I am ready and it can only hurt a maximum of 4 minutes (without breathing) to die. It completely takes the power and bite out of that moment of anxiety because I relax into it.

7. Laugh. Picture myself as having power...the power to laugh through adversity.

8. Maintain a grateful heart. Acknowledge/count your blessings. Affirm the positives from the current day.

I truly believe that applying these tools, makes me better able to handle the hairy times. But it's like with any tool. The more you practice it, the more repetitions you do, the more you are able to use those tools accurately--with sure and swift aim--when they are needed. When I first started doing push ups against the counter, I could only do 3 without collapsing in burning agony across my chest and lat flaps (double mastectomy with bilateral lat flap recon). Now I can do 12 reps without the neuralgia burning and muscle fatigue. It's the same thing with your brain.

Arming yourself with powerful psychological tools won't mean you will never walk through the fire again. It won't mean you will never have tests, trials, or tribulations. It won't mean you won't have times of weakness, temptation, grief, lamentation, or sadness/depression. It only means that when those times come, you are stronger. We are a warriors. We are not a victim tossed about by an uncontrollable force. We have power and control over our success.

Just my 2 cents. It's not worth too much, so please feel free to ignore me. I think I read that you are a doctor of psychology, so none of this is new to you, but there may be someone else out there who is helped from this info...

Glad to hear that today is better and that you got through yesterday and can put it behind you--checking it off your list! ((hugs))

Fluffy....I just want you to know that although you have not had surgery yet....You are a huge inspiration to us all. I know in my heart that you are going to be super successful in your journey, because you've got it together. An excellent outlook on life. A positive mindset. Thanks for the post, and keep em' coming!

[FluffyChix 17,415]

5 minutes ago, DropWt4Life said:

Fluffy....I just want you to know that although you have not had surgery yet....You are a huge inspiration to us all. I know in my heart that you are going to be super successful in your journey, because you've got it together. An excellent outlook on life. A positive mindset. Thanks for the post, and keep em' coming!

Thank you so much! Isn't perspective funny? Cuz you just said you see me as this inspiration. I do not see myself in that light. I just see me as some average schmoe off the street with no special talent or gift or magic. But I'm a fortunate schmoe. Because God is powerful and has helped me tremendously--especially in the tough times. And if God can help make me powerful, just an average schmoe--how much more so can he make you? Make each of us? If I can do something, then how much better will you be able to because of your advanced talents!

Edited October 4, 2017 by FluffyChix

[mw2543 23]

2 hours ago, DrGee said:

I really love my Bari family here. Last night really sucked for me. I ended up riding my elliptical and watching tv til it watched me. Everything u guys said was dead spot on but I’ll tell u something. When I’m in the throws of that misery and it’s got a hold on me like a newborn in a blanket, to shift my thoughts as y’all suggested is close to impossible. Luckily It typically hits me hardest at night and I can simply go to bed and eventually to sleep. Interestingly enough, I dream of eating my favorite food.

As a therapist myself, I know that to get thru it is to go thru it. There’s no testimony without test. I also know how this is actually my second chance at bat (I had gastric bypass in 2008). It’s these facts about my journey that tell my body (motor functions) and deep in my heart that cheating is not an option. My food addicted Mind (my brains pleasure center), on the other hand is what screams in agony. It’s sometimes physically draining for me. Luckily my education has taught me to understand this and that to let it out as I did in that post helps release a small bit of the stress. The rest, for me, is to vicariously live the lives or to become enthralled in the happening of television characters. Luckily it’s worst at night and this practice just seems to work out.

I hope this post helps someone who’s thinking about cheating on this journey. The battle between the “to do or not to do” is real. Everyday, every minute we beat that urge is a strike of accomplishment. ANYBODY that says we took the easy way out can kiss your ass for me too BC at the end of the day, only we as individuals know and live with our demons and what it takes to beat them. One day at a time.

All I can say to this is God bless you and thank you. If you believe in the Bible pick it up every time you have these temptations. Thank you so much for sharing. My surgery is November 2. You should be a writer. I can tell this is from your heart. My He help you find the strength you need to get through this. You are in my prayers and heart.

[mw2543 23]

5 hours ago, BunnyJean said:

I asked the nurse in my life skills class about the patch Vitamins. She said they "meaning my group" have not done much research on them but felt that Vitamins were better absorbed within the body instead of on skin. I'm still tempted to try, but....it's very important after surgery to get all your vitamins in and this is why we need to supplement. Since you won't have blood work done for at least a month or 3 months after surgery, I, frankly, don't want to make the mistake of using the patch and finding out it didn't work. And then be lacking in important vitamins that could be hard to catch up on. As far as hair loss, from what I've read, it's pretty much unavoidable. The nurse in my class said some was anesthesia stress, but most was because your body is going from consuming many many calories and all of a sudden sooo many less calories. Your body thinks it's going into starvation mode (from our cave man days that we don't need anymore) so it is shutting down anything not necessary for survival. And one of those is hair. So it stops the growing phase and puts the hair in resting phase so it needs no nutrients. After the resting phase naturally comes the shedding phase. And then a growth phase starts again once the body adjusts. Seems the time for Hair loss starts 3-7 months post op and slow regrowth. I have hormonal hair loss for 4 yrs at this point. So slim head of hair to begin with. My hairdresser may need to steer me in the direction of a wig! I'm not kidding on this! So....important....take your vitamins post op, make sure you are getting plenty of Protein. Most surgeons I think say 65 grams. Those that experienced hair loss shoot for 80 plus grams. Biotin is important. Some say zinc and Iron but I would only supplement those on advise of your dr. About the only Vitamin group you really can't overkill are the B's because they remove from the body fast. So if I do get a Vitamin Patch, it will be the B12 or B's if they have or Biotin. I will still supplement internally as well. See what my 3 month tests look like. Good luck to you!

I am going to go ahead and get a month's worth and then decided. I have enough pills to eat. lol

[DrGee 27]

Thanks Fluff

[mw2543 23]

2 hours ago, DrGee said:

Thanks Fluff

Edited October 5, 2017 by mw2543

[mw2543 23]

8 hours ago, mw2543 said:

I am going to go ahead and get a month's worth and then decided. I have enough pills to eat. lol I am posting the ingredients of the Patches Below are the three I am going to use . I just don’t want to wear a wig I am 62 and besides eating too much I am healthy If we don’t take care of ourselves now we will be sorry I am going to use these right after my surgery I know I don’t know what I am getting into Lol thats why I need to hear from people that went through the surgery