Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

I'm hiding my surgery from family anyone else ?



Recommended Posts

I'm not telling my family that I am having surgery, is anyone else here doing the same ?


Is your family not supportive? For me, I need there support. What about holidays? They will know sooner rather than later.

Sent from my SM-G920T using BariatricPal mobile app

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites


Is your family not supportive? For me, I need there support. What about holidays? They will know sooner rather than later.

Sent from my SM-G920T using BariatricPal mobile app


If you tell them AFTERWARDS they can't try to talk you out of anything.

Sent from my SM-G930V using BariatricPal mobile app

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

8 minutes ago, PollyWannaCracker? said:


If you tell them AFTERWARDS they can't try to talk you out of anything.

Sent from my SM-G930V using BariatricPal mobile app

That is exactly what I'm doing. Only a handful of people know ahead of time.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This may sound weird but I'm really glad that I'm not the only one who will not be telling my family. I was starting to feel a bit guilty about it. My kids have talked me out of it once already, telling me I'm taking the easy way out and if I have to change my lifestyle after the surgery then why not just do this without the surgery. My daughter-in-law has told me she will not support me if I get WLS. I'll tell them when I'm ready, and not a minute before.

My surgery is sometime in December. I still have 5 lbs to go before my Dr. will schedule my pre-op and there's an 8 week wait to see him, then another 2 weeks for surgery. Hopefully my family will understand that I did this for me and my health.....

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know what you mean my partner was dead against it but at the end of the day he accepted it as it is MY decision and no one else's. I have just had it done 2 days ago and have only told a few people my aunty took me to get it done as we were away a full weekend and she didn't want me to go alone even though she is not 100% comfortable she was still supportive. I haven't told my dad and don't have any intention I'm a 27 year old woman and don't need people judging my decision to change my life.

We shouldn't feel ashamed as we are taking positive steps don't feel bad about telling your family or some of your family as support is really important. I didn't realise how much pain I'd be in but would have been lost if no one knew as I have had to ask people for help.

I hope your surgery goes well and you get the support you need


Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Only told my husband and my two daughters, not my son, he's too opinionated. Didn't tell sisters, brothers, other family members or any friends. Don't want to hear their two cents worth.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've told everyone. Best decision I've ever made. Lost 75 lbs in 3 months. If I didn't tell them people would assume I'm sick or drugs. Plus I'm very outspoken so my family and friends know not to give me a hard time or advise. Or I'll start giving them advice about their life choices. Everyone has been super supportive and positive. Heck I've even told strangers I barely know. I could be the gastric sleeve spokeperson. Lol

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-N900A using BariatricPal mobile app

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My immediate circle knows but I'm not telling anyone else. I don't need the noise in my head already afraid as it is

Sent from my LG-K550 using BariatricPal mobile app

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

There are many people in my family that do not know either and my op was Feb 2013! Just didn't want any negative vibes as I had previously (many times) lost and gained right back. In fact I think some were waiting for the gaining, waiting to say....told you! Determine not to give them the satisfaction

Sent from my CUBOT MAX using BariatricPal mobile app

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

On 16/09/2017 at 6:56 AM, mzsantiago88 said:

My sisters are so negative and I'd rather not people don't even know we're sisters

I know this situation.

My youngest sibling, a sister 10 years my junior, and I get on so well. We swear that the brother and sister in between us were raised somewhere else and dropped from a plane!

We do not share personal feelings or much news with the in-betweens as they are so negative ... putting a black cloud on nearly everything.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

3 hours ago, chica320 said:

I told my boss this morning but not the rest of the office one co-worker thinks I'm having hernia surgery

This is a pretty 'normal' cover story situation.

I told my boss (at my P/T job) that I have a hernia complication and that it needs "intrusive and painful" investigation.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

4 hours ago, Barbzilla said:

If they ask, I'm not going to lie to them but I don't feel I need to tell them.

My strategy too, Barbzilla.

I'm (largely) keeping it quiet and secret but, ultimately, I won't lie if someone asks directly.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • cryoder22

      Day 1 of pre-op liquid diet (3 weeks) and I'm having a hard time already. I feel hungry and just want to eat. I got the protein and supplements recommend by my program and having a hard time getting 1 down. My doctor / nutritionist has me on the following:
      1 protein shake (bariatric advantage chocolate) with 8 oz of fat free milk 1 snack = 1 unjury protein shake (root beer) 1 protein shake (bariatric advantage orange cream) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein bar 1 protein shake (bariatric advantace orange cream or chocolate) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein soup (chicken) 3 servings of sugar free jello and popsicles throughout the day. 64 oz of water (I have flavor packets). Hot tea and coffee with splenda has been approved as well. Does anyone recommend anything for the next 3 weeks?
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        All I can tell you is that for me, it got easier after the first week. The hunger pains got less intense and I kind of got used to it and gave up torturing myself by thinking about food. But if you can, get anything tempting out of the house and avoid being around people who are eating. I sent my kids to my parents' house for two weeks so I wouldn't have to prepare meals I couldn't eat. After surgery, the hunger was totally gone.

    • buildabetteranna

      I have my final approval from my insurance, only thing holding up things is one last x-ray needed, which I have scheduled for the fourth of next month, which is my birthday.

      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BetterLeah

      Woohoo! I have 7 more days till surgery, So far I am already down a total of 20lbs since I started this journey. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Well done! I'm 9 days away from surgery! Keep us updated!

    • Ladiva04

      Hello,
      I had my surgery on the 25th of June of this year. Starting off at 117 kilos.😒
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Congrats on the surgery!

    • Sandra Austin Tx

      I’m 6 days post op as of today. I had the gastric bypass 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×