The Long Road To Now

[Véronique 238]

So, I've been fat for most of my life. I've been fat ever since I was roughly 10 years old, but what I considered fat then is nothing compared to the state I am at now. After I got sex reassignment surgery, my metabolism went straight to hell and my energy levels fell. I didn't make any lifestyle changes afterwards, but the fact that I didn't was a part of the problem that resulted in the state where I am now. And gaining so much weight, I likely contracted sleep apnea due to my weight gain and also contracted plantar fasciitis, which makes it harder to be out and about without my arches screaming at me. I've tried so many diet and exercise programmes, from Bikram Yoga to Weight Watchers, from marathon training to calorie counting, from parkour to South Beach. In fact, I would have continued trying if not for someone in a chat room. They told me that I should get a lap band... to which I said "why? I can exercise, I have the discipline to diet, why the hell would I need a lap band?" We had a long discussion about bariatric surgery and I decided to do my research.

I first considered the programme at Denver Health. After all, I didn't know about the programme just north of me in Fort Collins (and to be quite honest, that's kinda okay given the support network I've built up there) and I thought Denver Health was the natural place to go. That and UCHealth has had... issues with serving employees of the State of Colorado. So, I went to their support groups/medical weight loss classes (which were combined), attended sessions with their psychologist and saw their nutritionist only to get rejected because I had clinical depression. I feel the problem was that since the psychologist was not my regular psychologist and did not know me nor my support network well, that made her more skittish than she should have been.

I then contacted the programme at Northern Colorado Surgical Associates (which is a part of the Poudre Valley Health System and their combined programme is called the "Bariatric Centre of the Rockies") and started attending their medical weight loss classes, their patient education seminar, got my regular therapist and prescriber to write my letter, and as of Tuesday, had surgery with them. Unfortunately, I don't feel that I can attend their support groups often (as their support groups are in Fort Collins and the transit back down to Longmont after 8pm is dismal at best), but the good news is that I have found other practices in the area which have support groups that I might be able to attend. I have a therapist that I really mesh with and I have a support network from both my church and my political party (Green Party of Colorado, FTW!)

And I look forward to the future. I look forward to wearing all those cute goth/steampunk clothes I see in my Facebook news feed, I look forward to finishing up my transition by having facial feminization surgery/breast augmentation (which can only happen once I get to my goal weight, if my concern is having the best results), and most pressing, I look forward to the day I can waltz into the Denver Health support groups, look into the eyes of the nutritionists, psychologists, and that bariatric coordinator and tell them where they can stick it.