If you did not tell people...what did you say (for example, boss, co workers

[ProfessorSlim 115]

I am hoping to be cleared for the sleeve in late october or early november. I know I will need 2-3 weeks off of work post-op (correct me, please, if that is wrong) I teach in a small local college, so i do not do heavy lifting etc. I'd love to take a week, or less, off.

For a variety of reasons, I do not plan to tell tons of people about my decision to have the VSG, either in the pre-op or post-op period. My kids know, and a couple of my closest friends. But not my Mom, or ex-Husband (kids Dad, so we interact a bit),or my brothers..etc. I am hoping to not disclose it at work.

So, I am generally fine with that, but what do I tell my director in my department? she is great....but I just do not want to be the WLS poster child at work. Has anyone dealt with this? Could i just be vague and say "a minor procedure" or do I need to tell the actual reason when putting in for time off.

Any experiences or opinions from those of you who did not want this to be open at work?

[Introversion 1,876]

You are not legally required to reveal the reason you undergo surgery.

I told coworkers I was having a hernia repair. This was partially true since I did have a hiatal hernia repair along with the sleeve. However, I simply omitted the part about being sleeved.

[leanne0824 10]

I've decided not to tell work. I'm using vacation time and taking 10 working days. I'm a database manager and work from home. I've only told family. I know it's no one's business, but I still don't want to hear the negative comments as I'm getting ready for surgery on 9/13. ....only positive vibes right now. I may change my mind after surgery and healed a bit. Just not sure.

[brightfaith 187]

I am just in the early phases (having consults with surgeons and beginning the 6-month medically supervised weight management program), but I decided to tell my boss as I knew I would be requesting time out of the office for various appointments. We have a good relationship, she is very supportive, and she agreed to keep it confidential. I trust her, and I am lucky for that. I think you would be fine telling your supervisor you're having a minor procedure--there's no reason you have to go into detail about private medical issues.

I also have a very good friend at work, and I've been talking with her about it as well. Other than that, I would prefer not to share with others at work, but I anticipate comments about my food and weight and am dreading dealing with that. Two people in my immediate vicinity talk about food and weight constantly, and even today, one of them loudly announced after walking past my office what I was eating for lunch, giving their approval for it being healthy...thanks, but no thanks, I'd just like to eat in peace.

[girlgonesleevy 25]

I am just in the early phases (having consults with surgeons and beginning the 6-month medically supervised weight management program), but I decided to tell my boss as I knew I would be requesting time out of the office for various appointments. We have a good relationship, she is very supportive, and she agreed to keep it confidential. I trust her, and I am lucky for that. I think you would be fine telling your supervisor you're having a minor procedure--there's no reason you have to go into detail about private medical issues.
I also have a very good friend at work, and I've been talking with her about it as well. Other than that, I would prefer not to share with others at work, but I anticipate comments about my food and weight and am dreading dealing with that. Two people in my immediate vicinity talk about food and weight constantly, and even today, one of them loudly announced after walking past my office what I was eating for lunch, giving their approval for it being healthy...thanks, but no thanks, I'd just like to eat in peace.

I would say to them " if you were busy attending to your own health you wouldn't need to announce wtf im doing now and eating - so stop! " your much nicer than me... but maybe you could ask them for peace when your eating though.

It was in that moment; she learned self love was her priority.
HW 251 CW 237 GW 160

[Berry78 4,261]

You might want to consider having the surgery around Christmas break.. that way you can avoid actually missing much work.

[OutsideMatchInside 10,166]

I'd switch to Dec surgery date. You get to enjoy Thanksgiving and you get the cover of Christmas break. Normally I don't think there is any benefit to waiting but if waiting until Semseter break will allow you to automatically get more time, it seems like a good idea.

Other than that, go with hernia repair, even if you need another hernia repair later on it doesn't matter, because hernias are unseen and can reoccur. If you say something like gallbladder then later have a gallbladder attack at work, that will be an issue. You want to keep your story as simple as possible.

No one entitled to your personal medical information.

[Diana_in_Philly 1,426]

I didn't tell work, other than I was having a surgical procedure and would need to be out for a short time. When I was asked what the surgery was, I reminded my law firm that it is against the law for them to inquire as to what the procedure was and I was happy to provide a note from my doctor stating how long I had to be out. That pretty much ended that discussion.

When people asked, I just said I was having some abdominal surgery and would be out. I had surgery on Tuesday and was back to work the following Monday. (Your mileage my vary). When people commented on my new eating habits, I just said that the diet I was following was prescribed by my physician as a part of my surgical recovery.

Best of luck. (If you can push the surgery to semester break, it might be a better idea - it would give you time and then you could avoid questions completely. But that's up to you and your surgeon.)

[Sosewsue61 3,185]

If I were a professor I would wait until the semester break as well, and if I were still working I would not divulge that I was having wls, I would use the hernia story if pressed. I have only told a select few people - husband of course, daughters, a niece and a couple friends out of town. I am not telling my quilt group, my square dance friends, or other relatives. Many of my relatives are gossips, I doubt my square dance friends would be negative but they don't really 'need to know'.

Edited September 1, 2017 by Sosewsue61

[etc. etc. etc. 440]

I told the bare minimum of people at work. I did tell my boss, but just so she'd understand why I suddenly had eleven doctor's appointments in two months. It was good too, because by telling her, she okayed me using sick days for my time off rather than vacation. Everyone else I just told I was taking two days off.

My co-workers haven't noticed a thing. I've lost forty pounds (between the surgery and the pre-op diet) and they literally have not noticed. I guess they're not that attentive. This is good, as I have zero interest in having a bunch of discussions with them about this.

My mom is still around and I have three brothers, all married. I decided to tell my mom but not my brothers. One of them is an effortlessly skinny running nut who wouldn't understand, another is married to a woman who is pretty heavy but is convinced she can Pinterest and Blue Apron her way out of it. The youngest is a good guy, but his wife is very heavy and I don't want to create a situation where there is any pressure on her (Real or imagined) to do the same thing.

I told my more trusted friends, as it came up, but I didn't do a big announcement or anything. I'm going to a concert with a buddy I haven't seen since June this October and I guess he'll be surprised to see so much less of me.

Edited September 1, 2017 by etc. etc. etc.

[ProfessorSlim 115]

Thanks for all of the replies, I think I might tell my immedicate director of our dept., and let her know that I do not want it shared with the rest of the staff/faculty.

She is pretty cool, but very fit/thin....and I do wonder if she might be a little judgey....but then, that is realy not my problem, whatever she thinks. I suppose I am being a little judgy myslef, assuming how I think she might feel about it. anyway, It might be easier just to let her know. and be clear that I am not discussing it with others.

[Missymelt75 1]

I didn't share with a lot of people either. A couple of family members knew (mom and sister)and a very close friend that had the bypass knew. I told 2 people that I'm very close to at work. I'm not going to say anything once I return. I told my supervisor I had to have a procedure done and by law no one can ask you about it. Now when you start to lose weight they may get curious. And it's still up to you to share that information.