My Story

[kamjmm25 28]

I made the decision to have Gastric Sleeve Surgery back in May 2017. What led me to this decision was years of painful struggle and self-realization. I was always the heavier kid growing up. I was made fun of daily at school, at home, and out in public. I remember being called a whale and a cow. This made me feel so worthless and very shy. I was afraid to be noticed by anyone so I didn't talk much and was very quiet. I also did not have a lot of friends. When I got in to middle school I remember weighing in on my grandmother's scale in the bathroom and the scale said 120 pounds. My mother was there with me and she said now stay that weight for the rest of your life and you will be perfect. Needless to say, I did not stay 120 pounds for long. I did have a lot of friends in middle school and even into high school. I was always heavier than everybody else but I had a new don't mess with me attitude or I will destroy you attitude. This I now realize was just a coping mechanism to stop people from calling me hurtful names and making fun of me constantly. I survived high school this way until in my Junior year I became pregnant. My life drastically changed after that. I remember being called into the school counselors office to talk about my predicament. I remember the counselor asking me what I was going to do which my 16-year-old response was I have no f**cking clue. She then proceeded to tell me that if I kept my baby I would never amount to anything and end up a welfare mom and be poor for my whole entire life. I was dumbfounded and couldn’t believe that an adult in authority had just said that to me. I transferred schools soon after that. All this time I kept steadily gaining weight. I also decided to keep my baby and was determined to make a good life for her. I put my everything into caring for her and raising her. I put so much of myself into her that I did not have time to think about myself and kept gaining weight over the years. That baby is now 18 years old and just graduated high school with more than half of her associates degree completed. So I feel justified in proving that school counselor wrong but in all the effort I put into ensuring with every ounce of my being that my daughter grew up with more than I ever had my weight had ballooned to its highest. In October of this year I weighed 317 pounds. I was so disgusted with myself for failing myself at every turn. I went to my primary care Doctor and begged to be put on his weight loss program which consisted of taking phentermine and topiramate pills. I had to jump through the hoops of being approved for the weight loss pills. I had to have lab tests to make sure my health was good enough to take the pills because they can have some serious side effects. So I was very excited to get started. I took the tests and my lab work showed up with a very high white blood cell count. Which to my disappointment meant that I had to go to a specialist and get more testing. I went to the specialist and shortly after seeing him I ended up in the hospital with diverticulitis. I remember this as being October 31^st 2016 because I was in severe pain but being the great my mom that I am and always putting my kids first I wanted to make sure that I took them trick or treating before I took care of myself. So after they were done I went to the ER and was admitted. After that I went back to my Doctor and was finally approved to start the weight loss program being deemed healthy after my hospital stay. I actually did very well on the medication regimen. I ended up losing 45 pounds in 3 months. The medication curbed my appetite and sped up my metabolism. The only drawback is you can only take it for three months at a time and then you have to stop it for two months and have more testing to make sure you don’t have any of the bad side effects from the medications. While stopping the medication I gained back almost all of the weight that I had lost. I absolutely could not stand the fact that I had gained all most of my weight back. I went to my Doctor and demanded a referral for bariatric surgery because I had had enough. She gladly gave me the referral and left me on my own to figure out what to do next. So I started google searching surgeons in my area. I found a program at a local hospital that seemed promising. I made an appointment for May 24^th 2017. I began seriously thinking am I really going to have surgery. Am I taking an easy way out? Am I cheating? I had so many mixed emotions about this. There seems to be a stigma attached to weight loss surgery. That it is something to be embarrassed about. So I wasn’t fully convinced that I would agree to go through with it when I went to my appointment. So May 24^th came around and I was excited and nervous to meet with the nurse to discuss what bariatric surgery truly entailed and if it was right for me. I met with the nurse who was lovely and she had this great binder made up for me that had so much information in it. It even had my insurance information and how much my insurance would pay and how much I was supposed to pay out of pocket. Cost was my number one factor before even seriously considering about committing to this surgery. Could I afford this and how quickly could I have it done. Luck seemed to be on my side for once in my life and I found out that I had met my insurance deductible for the year and I only had to pay 20% of the surgery cost. Which to my dismay was about $6,000. So I immediately tried to figure out how I would cover that cost. The nurse gave me a number to call to discuss the cost with the hospital billing coordinator. So I put that on the back burner for the moment. She proceeded to go over the procedure with me and the life style changes that I would have to make. She then asked me if this was something that I could commit to. The funny thing is I have eaten out of control my whole life and exercised only sporadically here and there. But when she presented this to me I had no doubt in my mind that I would fully commit myself to this no matter the cost to my personal discomfort. I signed the paperwork and I was in. She then set me up for two tentative surgery dates. One was October 5 and the other was August 21^st. Luck seemed to be on my side again with my insurance. Most insurance companies make you go through a 6 month regimen of appointments with a nutritionist to work on a diet and other things to show that you have been trying to lose weight and failed in the past with a health care professionally supervised program. As it so happened I had already been doing this prior to deciding on surgery. The October date was in case my insurance wanted me to wait the 6 months and jump through the hoops. The August date was set in case by the grace of God I could by pass that requirement. So I left the surgeons office feeling very optimistic. I received a call a few hours later from the nurse to let me know that I could have surgery in August instead of October. I was elated. My next step was to get all of the clearances done so that an authorization could be submitted to the insurance. I also called the hospital billing staff and asked about the remaining $6,000 I had to pay. Luck was on my side once again. In addition to my health care insurance from my job I had a Medicaid insurance which is called a share of cost. With this additional insurance I was advised that I did not have to pay anything out of pocket. It all seemed to easy.

What I quickly realized was that the initial appointment was the only easy thing about this entire process. I had not been thinking about weight loss surgery for years or even months. It was a very new idea to me and a very last resort. So I knew virtually nothing about the process or anything involved with it really. I was told to get a cardiac clearance, psych clearance, and medical clearance as soon as possible. I thought right away no big deal I will get this done in the next couple of weeks. I already had an appointment with a psychiatrist who I was originally going to see for anxiety so I could check that appointment off. I had already seen a cardiologist because I had to do that when I was on the phentermine and topiramate. So I scheduled that with no issue. I was also scheduled to see the Nutritionist. I work Monday thru Friday business hours so I have virtually no time for appointments. So I tried to schedule all of these appointments on the same day. I scheduled the cardiac clearance, the psych clearance, and the first nutritionist appointment the first week of June. The cardiologist that I see was about an hour away from my home. So I got up early and went to that appointment first. When I got there the receptionist told me that my appointment had been cancelled. I of course became upset and asked why. She looked at the appointment note and advised me that I had cancelled the appointment yesterday. I then told her very forcefully I surely did not cancel this appointment since I drove all this way to be here. She then checked with the staff and found that one of the employees had cancelled the appointment by mistake but if I wanted to wait two hours I could still have the cardiac clearance done. So of course I said that I would wait because I wanted to be that much closer to getting surgery. I waited the two hours came back and was advised that they still could not do my cardiac clearance. So of course I through a huge fit which did absolutely no good besides having everybody stare at the angry obese lady. So I turned around and left because I did have my appointment for the psych clearance to get to. So I drove the hour back to my home town and went to see the psychiatrist. I told him that I was there for my anxiety but I also needed to have the psych clearance done. He told me that we would have to schedule another appointment for the clearance. I was okay with that because my original appointment was not for the surgery. After that I met with the nutritionist for the first time. This was a group meeting with other patients that are going to have surgery as well. It was an interesting meeting that I felt went well. So after that I decided to change my cardiologist to a local Doctor and I scheduled a cardiac clearance and another appointment with the psychiatrist. I also had to have an appointment with the actual surgeon who would be performing my surgery. I had not met him at this point and the nurse had picked him for me because I had no information about either surgeon. Which I realize now was a poor way to decide on a surgeon. I do not even know why she picked him for me. So I met with the surgeon on 6/14. He basically walked into the room said hi and asked why I was there and he felt my stomach and said I think we can help you. He asked if I had any questions which I did not because his nurse had answered all of them for me when I met her. He turned around and walked out. The meeting with him was basically five minutes. After that I went to my appointment for the psych clearance again. When I saw the Doctor I told him I was there for my psych clearance and he acted surprised like he didn’t know this was the reason that I was coming to see him. He then said he would write the letter but he needed information from the surgeon’s office. So I left there without the letter but I felt assured that he would write the letter and get it to the surgeon. I then went to my cardiac clearance appointment. I had an EKG and the cardiologist said that he wanted to do an echocardiogram before he would clear me for surgery. Of course this had to be done at another appointment. So to my frustration I ended up going back a week later for the echo. I was advised that I was cleared for surgery after that and the information would be sent to my surgeons office. So I waited another two weeks before calling the nurse at the surgeons office to ask if they had everything they needed from me and to confirm that my surgery would still be happening in August. This was sometime during the week of July 10^th. I spoke with the nurse who seemed a bit irritated with me and I had no idea why. She advised me that surgery was scheduled for October and I still had a long way to go. I immediately got upset and reminded her that she had advised me that I could have surgery in August. She then placed me on hold while she checked into it. When she came back on the phone she rudely told me that I still had to have my psych clearance done and cardiac clearance. I told her that I already had both of them done and the information was supposed to be sent to the office. So she told me she would call me back. So I played the waiting game. When she finally called me back she was still a bit rude and said I called your cardiologist and he said you still needed to come in for the echo. I explained to her that it was already done. She had called the previous cardiologists office although I had already told her I switched cardiologists. She also stated that I never had my psych clearance done because she had called the psychiatrists office and they advised her that I left them a message earlier asking for a fit in appointment to get it done. She also advised that I had not set a soon enough appointment for my medical clearance. I was sincerely frustrated and felt like I was ready to just say f**k it at this point. But I didn’t. I hung up with her and spent hours calling the psychiatrists office and leaving messages to find out what was going on. They never answer the phones and of course I can’t just leave work and speak with them in person. So I was scheduled for another nutritionist appointment on July 21^st. I had decided that I would go in person on that day to the psychiatrist’s office and wait for as long as it took to get that letter written. So I did go into the office and spoke with the receptionist who knew exactly who I was because of my multiple calls. She apologized to me profusely and said I thought you had not had your psych clearance done because I have been on vacation and when you called for an appointment I just assumed it was for the clearance. So I did get the letter from her. I got a hard copy and had her fax a copy to the surgeon. I then left to meet the nutritionist. While I was at the appointment with the nutritionist I received a call from the nurse who advised me she received the psych clearance and now she had everything she needed to submit everything to the insurance. She said I couldn’t get a set date for surgery until next week because the scheduler would not be in the office until next Tuesday. She said she would call me at the end of next week to schedule pre-op teaching with her. She also said that my last appointment with the nutritionist would be 7/27. I was so happy. I felt like finally things were going in the right direction. After I left the nutritionists office I checked my email and saw that the nurse had sent me an email. I was not expecting any communication with her until the end of next week. So to my surprise and elation she asked me if I could come in on 7/24 to do the pre op teaching. It is very short notice so I will have to call out of work for the appointment but I wouldn’t miss it for anything. I also got onto my online account to confirm my appointment and I saw that she had scheduled me for other appointments. I have a final meeting with the surgeon on August 16^th and then I saw that there is something scheduled called a pre-admissions call for August 17^th. I am not really sure what a preadmissions call is but I am assuming it means that I have a confirmed surgery date now even if she has not told me yet. I am also scheduled for a post op visit on September 6^th. So of course I got excited and called the insurance to see if they had started the process for getting authorization for surgery but I was told that nothing had been submitted. So I am now in a stage of not knowing what is going on exactly. I keep thinking they wouldn’t have scheduled me for all of those appointments if they didn’t think I would be approved. I also asked my insurance company how long it takes to get approval. They advised seven business days. So all of this needs to happen fast if I am to have surgery next month. I hate not knowing what is going on and left in the virtual dark. I am a planner who loves to plan everything so this is driving me insane. If you have read my whole story I want to thank you for taking the time to read my novel (lol) in its entirety. I will keep anyone who is interested updated on my progress through this confusing, nerve racking, and exciting process.

[momx02 20]

I read your story,, I'm so sorry you had to go through so many hoops to get here. I hope you continue to make progress and get your scheduled date soon! Please keep in touch. Feel free to send me a message anytime.

[kamjmm25 28]

Thanks. I am feeling optimistic about my appointment tomorrow so I shall see.

[kamjmm25 28]

I got my surgery day. Its set for August 24th and I start my preop diet August 10th

Sent from my SM-G930P using BariatricPal mobile app

[momx02 20]

Aug 24!! Awesome!! Your gonna do great!! In aug 1 so I can give you all the post op tips

[Frustr8 7,886]

And it's been a year @kamjmm25, are you still doing okay and did you make your weight goal easily?Lot of new people here but we would 💘 to hear from you again

[momx02 20]

Hey 1 year - crazy huh! I didn’t quite make my goal- but way better than I was a year ago,, down 87lbs - how about you? How are you doing? Amazing how life has changed in 1 year- it’s been Ana awesome journey! Let me know how your doing?