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Hi, my name is Marilyn and I live in No rural FL. I have been "chubby" as a child (birth wt. 6#2oz not acceptable...lets feed her!), overweight as a teenager, and first termed "morbidly obese" after my 2nd pregnancy at age 23. Fast forward 25 years (and several doctors later), in 2003 I was diagnosed with kidney cancer and my kidney was removed, my very stern doctor said I needed to have WLS..."primary cause of kidney cancer in women is obesity". Insurance said no to lapband (bypass was considered to compromising to remaining kidney), I requested a medical exception and their answer was still no. Fast forward again 5 years in January 2008 I had a total knee replacement with some major complications.Again the suggestion of WLS was made. In February, my insurance company newsletter introduced lapband coverage. Last month, my PCM requested a referral for my surgeon, approved in less then 2 weeks, and my first consultation/class was this past Thursday. My insurance doesn't require the 6 mo diet supervision; and the insurance clerk said surgical approvals are only taking 2-4 weeks. Tomorrow I have to have my PCM request cardiologist & urologist consults. At first, I allowed fear to overwhelm me and I questioned whether considering this surgery was demonstrating a lack of faith that God is in control of my life and He could heal my food addiction in His time. God blessed me with a DH who consistantly reminded me to look at the circumstances that could only have come from my loving Father. Finding this website and reading Christian responses to my doubts/fears is just another blessing.

Edited by pmcfarm
PTA in title should be PTL

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Hi, my name is Marilyn and I live in No rural FL. I have been "chubby" as a child (birth wt. 6#2oz not acceptable...lets feed her!), overweight as a teenager, and first termed "morbidly obese" after my 2nd pregnancy at age 23. Fast forward 25 years (and several doctors later), in 2003 I was diagnosed with kidney cancer and my kidney was removed, my very stern doctor said I needed to have WLS..."primary cause of kidney cancer in women is obesity". Insurance said no to lapband (bypass was considered to compromising to remaining kidney), I requested a medical exception and their answer was still no. Fast forward again 5 years in January 2008 I had a total knee replacement with some major complications.Again the suggestion of WLS was made. In February, my insurance company newsletter introduced lapband coverage. Last month, my PCM requested a referral for my surgeon, approved in less then 2 weeks, and my first consultation/class was this past Thursday. My insurance doesn't require the 6 mo diet supervision; and the insurance clerk said surgical approvals are only taking 2-4 weeks. Tomorrow I have to have my PCM request cardiologist & urologist consults. At first, I allowed fear to overwhelm me and I questioned whether considering this surgery was demonstrating a lack of faith that God is in control of my life and He could heal my food addiction in His time. God blessed me with a DH who consistantly reminded me to look at the circumstances that could only have come from my loving Father. Finding this website and reading Christian responses to my doubts/fears is just another blessing.

God bless you, Marilyn. I am so glad you are here with us - you are going to be a blessing to all of us. I pray we can give you the support you need and deserve. God is in control of your life and He has opened this door for you. I'm sure all your new friends on this site will be praying for you.

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Hi Valerie I am losing my 25 lbs before surgery weight with Kaiser. I am starting to have doubts about having the lap band or RNY bypass. I am definitely not a disciplined person. even though I am praying for that fruit of the spirit (self control) I know it's my decision but any advice would be much appriciated. I have heard that if you are not a disciplined person you should get the RNY bypass. I also am scared about the fills and having to get an unfill and about getting something stuck swallowing. I already have that problem sometimes when I can't swallow food and it takes about 2 hours for a piece of meat to go down. AM I freaking out for no reason? In Christ Mary

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Hi Valerie I am losing my 25 lbs before surgery weight with Kaiser. I am starting to have doubts about having the lap band or RNY bypass. I am definitely not a disciplined person. even though I am praying for that fruit of the spirit (self control) I know it's my decision but any advice would be much appriciated. I have heard that if you are not a disciplined person you should get the RNY bypass. I also am scared about the fills and having to get an unfill and about getting something stuck swallowing. I already have that problem sometimes when I can't swallow food and it takes about 2 hours for a piece of meat to go down. AM I freaking out for no reason? In Christ Mary

Just a comment here about undisciplined people should get the RNY. I can understand that statement now, because I was banded the 5th of June, and have only lost about 12-13 lbs. I have had one fill, and I do believe things will get better. I know the band is only a tool, but I feel like if I want to be losing now, I just need to go on a diet, because the band doesn't seem to be helping yet. I trust my "tool" will start working with more fills. But, back to undisciplined people should get the RNY...weren't most of us undisciplined, and that's how our weight got out of control to begin with? I know for others, there may be other reasons their weight got out of control, but for most, I would think it's lack of discipline? That surgery may have been better for me, as far as being more successful, but I was scared of the RNY. Sorry for ranting, and I'm definately not lashing out at the poster....I'm just in frustration mode now.....I think some have coined this time period, "Bandster Hell"? I am praying for God to help me, to help this band work!

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Mary T and Summer08,

Reading your posts I immediately reacted with the thought that I am absolutely a disciplined person. But then ... I have to admit there are areas in my life that prove the opposite. Since retirement from the real work world several years ago I still struggle with structuring my time in order to accomplish those things I wanted to do once I had all this time! That has definitely been a self discipline issue with me. Does this run into other areas? I'll have to think on that one...

For me, the main reason I am choosing banding over bypass is because it is less invasive, no rerouting of anything, and reversible if it becomes a serious medical issue. I'm going into this with the commitment to the long haul, but it is reassuring to me to know it can be reversed if absolutely necessary.

Thanks for the "food for thought" for Breakfast this morning...

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Summer 08,

I totally agree. We do tend to be an undiciplined crew. Besides statistically being 10 times safer than RNY, after approx 7 years after having weight loss surgery, my surgeon said that banders and RNY people have basically the same success rate(they lose much, much faster...hit a low weight and may gain a little back....then maintain. We tend to do the same)I chose lap-band because I was willing to work a little harder...lose slower...but be safer. Now..regarding your so-called modest weight loss. I THINK YOU ARE DOING FANTASTIC!!!!. I had my surgery on April the 11th, and I have lost the same amount of weight you have. I am trying very hard to not get discouraged. Someone at this site once said that " the band is not around our heads...its around our stomachs". I wish could give you themagic piece of advice to bring you out of you "bandster hell", but I can't. I WILL SAY THIS..in my 37 years of living, just before I found success in any area in which I was struggling, the stuggle was the most intense right before I found success. I know without a shadow of a doubt that my struggle with compulsive overeating only seems to be getting harder because I am about to have a break-through. All I have to do, is my part and believe in Christ for my healing and daily restoration. One thing that has really helped me is the website thedailyplate.com. Another person posting to this site suggested it to me and it HAS HELPED ME TREMENDOUSLY in determining the things that I can do better. For example, I only THOUGHT I was eating a high Protein diet. When I began keeping a more accurate record through this site, I discovered that I was only getting between45 and 50 grams, rather than the suggested minimum of 60. My carbs were also waaay to high. Most importantly, the site is so much easier to use than a pen and pad.

Edited by willbefine

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willbefine,

Thank you for your words of encouragement! It is soooo true that the band is not around our heads. That's where my biggest battle is now. When I finish a second plate of food now, I am miserable afterwards, but when I go to load up the second plate, I think I want it. I guess I'm not eating slow enough for the signal to get to my brain that I am full after the 1st plate, or satisfied would be a better term to use. So, now I have to use my head, and ask God to remind me, before I eat a second plate, that I REALLY don't want it. I'll only be disappointed in myself if I go there, and miserabbly FULL! He reminded me last night before I went back for seconds, and I was proud of myself that I didn't. It is very much a battle in my mind. I have lived to eat for so long, and I want this band to enable me to eat to live instead. It is so frustrating to me when I know all the right things to do, and have for years, but haven't disciplined myself to do them. With God's help, and encouraging words from all of you, we will overcome!

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Mary T and Summer08, and to all who are feeling undiciplined : try to remember, all of life is about making choices whether wise or unwise. My unwise food choices and excess amounts led to my obesity--my childhood obesity was not my choice, however, from age 18 I could have chosen to change and lose the 25-30# and continue to make healthy choices. But, I chose to use every "diet" failure as a reason to beat myself (does this sound familar??). Never until this year at age 63 could I admit that the root of the problem all these years has been rebellion (and not confined to weight issues). My Father gave me free will, but is ever ready to hear my whispered cry (or maybe more correctly stated "whimpy whining"). We can rest in His promises of good provisions and peace...even when we don't understand His ways or timing. Thankfully we have a haven of support in this message board. MarilynC

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If there are any Christians out there who are looking for special support during this time I thought we could start a thread related to this. It might help with those thoughts and doubts as to if this is the right thing we are doing or any other 'shares' that might come to mind. I could use some at this time in my walk.

Sister in Christ,

Valerie

[ATTACH]10015[/ATTACH]

Hello Valerie - I am new to this forum and not yet banded - I have my surgery date of 9/30. I have fought over the idea of messing with God's plan for me. I continue to wonder if this is the way to go.

Edited by laurasue

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laurasue

I'm not Valerie, but as another "new" member I am certainly glad she set-up this site. It is such a safe place to discuss our feelings. Know that you're not alone in the conflict you are feeling. Early in the process I went through a lot of questioning about whether the decision to have surgery was somehow showing a lack of faith. From a lot of the posts I found I wasn't alone with those feelings. God has a plan for each of us and is for certain able to close any door that would block His plan...the enemy, however, delights in any mental confusion & pain he can cause. Welcome to the board and know that here you will receive support and prayers. MarilynC

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I hear many of you struggling with the idea that the surgery is showing a lack of faith, and I'm sending hugs and encouragement to all of you!

The way I see this is, satan does whatever he can do to us to make us weak, and for some of us the dirty trick he has sent our way is to give us this problem with our weight. He will do ANYTHING to get our focus on something besides God. I see this surgery as a big ol kick in his face, telling him he's NOT in charge of me or my body. The surgery is a tool to overcome the challenge we've been given, just like any other tool and I'm using it without a qualm.

I also believe what somebody else said about God throwing roadblocks if we are on the wrong path. I'm keeping my eyes open and I trust that if this is something He doesn't want me to do, I will see signs.

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I hear many of you struggling with the idea that the surgery is showing a lack of faith, and I'm sending hugs and encouragement to all of you!

The way I see this is, satan does whatever he can do to us to make us weak, and for some of us the dirty trick he has sent our way is to give us this problem with our weight. He will do ANYTHING to get our focus on something besides God. I see this surgery as a big ol kick in his face, telling him he's NOT in charge of me or my body. The surgery is a tool to overcome the challenge we've been given, just like any other tool and I'm using it without a qualm.

I also believe what somebody else said about God throwing roadblocks if we are on the wrong path. I'm keeping my eyes open and I trust that if this is something He doesn't want me to do, I will see signs.

I agree with you, Lauralee, and I also think we have to be persistent in our Quest for healing from morbid obesity. The normal "roadblocks" of getting approval from surgeon and/or insurance are difficulties all of us face in this Quest. I have to be able to discern what is the normal roadblock and what is my Father saying "no, this is not the right way for you." That's the tough part. I believe He continues to guide me down this road - unexpected problems have cropped up along the way, and within a short time, the phone rings and the way has been cleared to the next step. I have seen this process over and over in my 66 years, and I have finally learned to trust it!

To those of you who struggle with this issue - please don't let the details of the process get you down. Be encouraged, be proactive and claim your good health. Praise God!

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Hi. I had my first visit on May 22 and was banded on June 26th. From May til now i have lost 27#. Its been an interesting journey! My doubt about my lack of faith was taken care of quite quickly-only a month from start of the process to surgery! But I too had those doubts. I actually had people ask me if I thought this was the easy way out, and would God really chose for me to go under the knife. I believe God gives us lots of choices for help, and we need to take them when we feel He is telling us to do so. The band is a tool, and far from easy for me so far!! liquids for 2 weeks before surgery and for 2 weeks afterwards-NOT EASY!! I am struggling this week and anxious to go for my first fill on Aug. 5th. I have lost since surgery but am able to eat everything now. I have been careful to watch my portions but its getting harder. Hopefully he will fill, some people who are losing he doesn't add anything. Pray for some guidance for both he and I as the appointment approaches next week. Thanks

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ltqram4...that was very fast. I am still in processing. My approval for surgery was submitted on July 19th and approved on July 25th (6 days is remarkable for Tricare) I don't have a surgery date yet and on my consult meeting with my surgeon I was told he was booked up until the end of September. My pre-op schedule is moving right along:

GB ultrasound 7/31

CT Lungs-Abdo=Pelvis-Legs & Bone scan 8/14

Psych eval 8/18

Diet eval (pending)

Urologist for Renal clearance 8/21

Cardiologist for Cardic clearance (pending)

Labwork 8/11

Has anyone had a filter placed for prevention of any possible clot movement?

As this whole process is moving along, I see my Fathers' hand on my life and feel His peace. MarilynC.

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Hi all! LauraLee I could not agree more with you guys!!! I sing in a Country Gospel band at my church and one of my favourite songs that I have the priviledge of singing is Jesus Take the Wheel... well, about 3 months before making my decision I was singing that and TOTALLY meaning for God to take this burden. I am just so tired of dealing with it (went on my first diet at 11 years old - I'm now 43 and 250lbs!) In June I finally decided enough was enough and started researching everything from RNY, Duodenal Switch, sleeve and the lapband. Of course I prayed and asked him to show me the way, give me the signs and let me know which way I was supposed to go... right down to when it came to the surgery date. I'm having my surgery in Tijuana with Dr. Kuri and there was really only one date in August that would work for my husband and I. I sent it off to my Facilitator and just said "If it is your will Lord". Within 2 hours I had the response... "You GOT IT!"... I just cried. I completely agree that satan will do whatEVER he can to get a grip on us through any addiction or weakness. Jesus wants us happy and healthy so we can continue to do his work and help to spread the good news that he is here for everyone.

THANK YOU for starting this thread - by just looking at the number of posts I know that I am with an incredible group of people and I can not wait to get to know you all better...

Together in Christ

Thank you Lord Jesus for this gift!

AMEN! :biggrin2:

Stacey

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    • BabySpoons

      Sometimes reading the posts here make me wonder if some people just weren't mentally ready for WLS and needed more time with the bariatric team psychiatrist. Complaining about the limited drink/food choices early on... blah..blah...blah. The living to eat mentality really needs to go and be replaced with eating to live. JS
      · 1 reply
      1. Bypass2Freedom

        We have to remember that everyone moves at their own pace. For some it may be harder to adjust, people may have other factors at play that feed into the unhealthy relationship with food e.g. eating disorders, trauma. I'd hope those who you are referring to address this outside of this forum, with a professional.


        This is a place to feel safe to vent, seek advice, hopefully without judgement.


        Compassion goes a long way :)

    • Theweightisover2024🙌💪

      Question for anyone, how did you get your mind right before surgery? Like as far as eating better foods and just doing better in general? I'm having a really hard time with this. Any help is appreciated 🙏❤️
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      1. NickelChip

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        That sounds awesome. I'll have to check that out thanks!

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