Dating horrors

[kad_82 42]

Ok so this is the only place I can share this. I am 5 weeks post opt feeling good and plugging along. Probably my own fault but started back online dating. Got to a point someone wanted to meet and I told them about my wls and they said they had to go and stop talking to me. So what's worse being overweight and not trying to help myself and single or overweight but making progress to be healthy. Now I just feel awful.

[itstime4me123 139]

Ok so this is the only place I can share this. I am 5 weeks post opt feeling good and plugging along. Probably my own fault but started back online dating. Got to a point someone wanted to meet and I told them about my wls and they said they had to go and stop talking to me. So what's worse being overweight and not trying to help myself and single or overweight but making progress to be healthy. Now I just feel awful.

Sounds like you dodged a billet with that one. You will find a genuine person that realizes everyone has a journey. Hang in there.

[Ldyvenus 317]

That was no loss. You just scared a shallow immature little boy away. There are better men out there.

[Karcares 34]

You might want wait to share that info until you know someone better. Have a single friend who is dating and she explains away her "small appetite" with " I just ate", or "not that hungry, let's just get appetizers". Not everyone needs to know your medical history right off the bat.

[ColleenErin1974 195]

Ok so this is the only place I can share this. I am 5 weeks post opt feeling good and plugging along. Probably my own fault but started back online dating. Got to a point someone wanted to meet and I told them about my wls and they said they had to go and stop talking to me. So what's worse being overweight and not trying to help myself and single or overweight but making progress to be healthy. Now I just feel awful.

Don't get down on yourself because of one person you never met. Know that they missed out on an opportunity to meet a strong and capable woman. If you want to be upfront to perspective dates than tell them what you're comfortable talking about. Some people are pass judgements before actually seeing the entire package.
Smile and know you are beautiful and happy! Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Good luck to you. You can do this.

[dixonpratt 55]

WLS triggers people to think of someone who needs someone to bathe them or the extreams that are on tv.

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[kad_82 42]

Don't get down on yourself because of one person you never met. Know that they missed out on an opportunity to meet a strong and capable woman. If you want to be upfront to perspective dates than tell them what you're comfortable talking about. Some people are pass judgements before actually seeing the entire package.
Smile and know you are beautiful and happy! Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Good luck to you. You can do this.

Thank you so much for your kind words. I didn't give them my medical record they had been asking to meet up and just mention I was recovering.

[kad_82 42]

Sounds like you dodged a billet with that one. You will find a genuine person that realizes everyone has a journey. Hang in there.

Thank you:)

[OutsideMatchInside 10,166]

Wait until you are a year post-op, then date.

[PAstudent 117]

Just remember that you're beautiful, you're a good person, and you're worthy and deserving of love. If he's too shallow or immature to see that then you don't want him. With patience on both ends, you'll find the right one <3

[PatientEleventyBillion 851]

2 hours ago, itstime4me123 said:

Sounds like you dodged a billet with that one. You will find a genuine person that realizes everyone has a journey. Hang in there.

I second this.. a blessing in disguise.

[TippyToesX 30]

I'm sorry you had to deal with that nonsense, but better sooner rather than later. (What I mean is you found out that he wasn't a good person after getting close it attached)

But when does one know what is the "right" time to share that they've had wls? 🤔

[XYZXYZXYZ1955 675]

Everyone's experience is going to be different in this area, I think. Some people have someone at their highest weight who supports them on their journey--that's what I'm hoping, but I don't really know. But whatever he thinks or does, I need to do this for ME. If he likes the result, great. If not, someone else will, I believe.

I don't think you should wait to be on a dating site or meet someone--go for it. You don't know for sure even that the guy went away because you told him about the weight-loss surgery--it could be that, it could be that he just met someone else, it could be that his wife discovered what he was up to, it could be that he broke his arm . . . it could be that he realized you were more honest than he was. Doesn't matter . . .keep on moving forward!! And good luck!

[LetGoJo 27]

I came looking for stories re dating - I personally have not had much joy with dating as the people I attract are fickle and also into large ladies.
I would not be concerned re this behaviour- a lot of people mess around on dating sights with no intention to meet or indeed have relationships already. I have also know people who have been successful with online dating

[Evans Wifey 26]

I meet my guy over Plenty of Fish 2 months after I started my bariatric classes. I told him after we had been seeing each other over a month that I was going to have weight loss surgury. He has been so supportive. We got married 12/16. I had my surgury 3/17 and since I have lost over 40lbs. I was afraid that since I'm no longer as big as I was he wouldn't be as attracted. But thank God that he has become even more attracted to me. I was lucky enough to find a man that fell in love with my heart not just my body. Don't let this bad experience stop you. The right one is out there.

Sent from my SM-G935V using BariatricPal mobile app