Dealing with food you can't eat

[walker6153 4]

So, my wife has invited us over to our neighbors house for dinner tomorrow night. I'm 17 days out from surgery and still on a damn liquid diet. I don't want to be around food I can't eat for another 5 weeks. How do I tell her that? This is making me regret having the surgery. All I want to be able to eat food. I'm so tired of drinking my calories

[Paul Bahr 73]

Hang in there brother. The liquids-only phase is really tough. Mine lasted a week and I was never so happy to leave it behind. You'll make it.

I struggled with this issue last weekend. We went to our friends' house for Easter. Fortunately they knew what I'd done and were perfectly fine with my bringing my own stuff to consume. I'm in the pureed foods stage of my doctor's post-op diet and it was rough eating my blended Soup while everyone else was eating ham, scalloped potatoes and all the rest.

With this surgery, you've GOT to get your mindset changed to where food isn't what we're always looking for. I'm still working through this myself so I appreciate the struggle. I'll have another challenge like this to face tomorrow night during an appreciation dinner for the volunteers in the area where I serve at church.

A couple of things I tried to focus on during the meal:

• This is only a temporary thing - I've got the rest of my life to eat regular food again. "This too shall pass".
• While sharing a meal with someone is centered around food, what's truly to be appreciated is the time spent with that person or people.

[Navigating the Wilderness 824]

4 hours ago, walker6153 said:

I don't want to be around food I can't eat for another 5 weeks.

Easy, you tell your wife exactly what you just typed.

Edited April 20, 2017 by Navigating the Wilderness

[blizair09 3,250]

4 hours ago, walker6153 said:

So, my wife has invited us over to our neighbors house for dinner tomorrow night. I'm 17 days out from surgery and still on a damn liquid diet. I don't want to be around food I can't eat for another 5 weeks. How do I tell her that? This is making me regret having the surgery. All I want to be able to eat food. I'm so tired of drinking my calories

I would just say exactly what you have written here. This is why I was transparent about all aspects of my journey (including the surgery) with anyone and everyone from the beginning. You need to do whatever you have to do to be successful, and if that means missing out on a few social engagements -- especially in the beginning -- then, so be it!

And, by the way, the liquid parts of the journey are among the hardest parts, in my opinion. But they are in place for a reason. Hang in there; it will soon pass.

Good luck!

[bridgesrhonda 14]

its not easy im still haveing a hard time with it

[clc9 644]

You're at the worst part of this. I think you can ask to bow out gracefully given the circumstances.

[OutsideMatchInside 10,166]

If it was dinner out it would be easier to sit there and eat nothing. I couldn't do that at the home of a friend/relative. I know people would be offended.

Just stay home. The first 3 months all I did was walk, work and learn my sleeve. I went places as little as possible.

[Julie norton 2,850]

Unless you want to tell and probably have people focus on wls, I would beg off.

It's one charade to move food around and pick at it. I generally get up first and help clear when it is appropriate...

(People notice far less than you think)

but liquid only is unreasonable to fool people. Hard decision. Tell all and probably discuss it ad nauseum

Best of luck with your choice... one of many coming!!

[evesta 67]

lol I'm bad but I'd fake illness and not go. It's easier after awhile but when it's new it's kind of torturous.

[Ceej0505 2]

So, my wife has invited us over to our neighbors house for dinner tomorrow night. I'm 17 days out from surgery and still on a damn liquid diet. I don't want to be around food I can't eat for another 5 weeks. How do I tell her that? This is making me regret having the surgery. All I want to be able to eat food. I'm so tired of drinking my calories

I tell people I'm not able to join them for meals b/c I'm on a doctor supervised diet, but I'd be happy to join them for coffee...then I bring my own Decaf in a travel mug. That allows me socialization on my terms.

[Sosewsue61 3,185]

Tell them you had ulcer surgery and can't eat anything if you don't want to say it was wls. And then have a really frank discussion with your wife.

[laurierrt 5]

It has helped me to focus on the amazing fact that I'm not even hungry than to look at meals as something I'm missing out on. Helped me get through lunch with my dad yesterday. He had pizza. I had Water. The pizza looked so good, but I didn't even crave a bite. What a wonderful tool!