Sabotaging Myself

[hermione53 157]

I think the hardline feedback is needed. I also think that support and compassion are needed more. Please applaud yourself for your honesty and your commitment to your health. I'm four months out and luckily did not feel cravings for the first couple of months, but it's gotten harder. I'm in a mindful eating group now. Mindful eating is eating with awareness and NONJUDGMENT. I personally don't bounce back from poorer eating choices if I get stuck in judging myself.

I really like the workbook we are using in the group. It's called Eat, Drink, and Be Mindful by Susan Albers. I also recommend the book The Self-Compassion Diet by Jean Fain.

Regarding finding a therapist, if you work you might check to see if you have an EAP (employee assistance program). They're usually good at providing referrals. Also, I think the Psychology Today website has a therapist database that you can search.

Since you were so honest, I will be, too. Yesterday I went way off track and ordered some food from PF Changs. I ate a small plate and started to go for another. I checked in with my body and felt full. So, I decided to throw the rest of the food down the garbage disposal (90%). It was greasy and carb laden. I didn't feel great physically, but I didn't judge myself. I put the food into My Fitness Pal and moved on. I'm proud of myself for throwing the rest away!

Good luck to you!

[Tessa1988 20]

I think the hardline feedback is needed. I also think that support and compassion are needed more. Please applaud yourself for your honesty and your commitment to your health. I'm four months out and luckily did not feel cravings for the first couple of months, but it's gotten harder. I'm in a mindful eating group now. Mindful eating is eating with awareness and NONJUDGMENT. I personally don't bounce back from poorer eating choices if I get stuck in judging myself.

I really like the workbook we are using in the group. It's called Eat, Drink, and Be Mindful by Susan Albers. I also recommend the book The Self-Compassion Diet by Jean Fain.

Regarding finding a therapist, if you work you might check to see if you have an EAP (employee assistance program). They're usually good at providing referrals. Also, I think the Psychology Today website has a therapist database that you can search.

Since you were so honest, I will be, too. Yesterday I went way off track and ordered some food from PF Changs. I ate a small plate and started to go for another. I checked in with my body and felt full. So, I decided to throw the rest of the food down the garbage disposal (90%). It was greasy and carb laden. I didn't feel great physically, but I didn't judge myself. I put the food into My Fitness Pal and moved on. I'm proud of myself for throwing the rest away!

Good luck to you!

Thank you so much for your great suggestions!! And good job for not eating the rest of the food. You should be proud of yourself for that

[CocoNina 210]

Let my start by saying before surgery, I had absolutely no self control when it came to food. I lived for what my next meal would be. If I ate pizza, I ate half a large and a box of breadsticks and still had room for dessert and a soda. My diet consisted of probably 70% carbs. So I knew having surgery would be a mental challenge more than anything, but I also didn't intend to never eat a slice of pizza again. I wanted to learn to control my cravings and eat portion sizes that are acceptable. That all being said, I'm 3.5 weeks post op and I already feel I am failing myself. The carb cravings have NOT gone away, and I find that I am able to eat anything. I have eaten Pizza Crust, biscuit, chips, bread. All of it goes down just fine and what's worse, makes me feel satisfied in a way that a stick of cheese or tuna does not. I realize that if I continue this path I won't see the results I want, and having paid for this surgery out of pocket, I do not want it to be wasted. I need help please [emoji24]

3.5 weeks post op is really early especially eating chips. You don't want to open a staple or have your stomach not heal properly. Our stomachs aren't fully healed until 8-10 weeks post op (what I read).

To me carbs is comfort food. One of my problems before surgery. When I was stressed or sad all I wanted was those carbs. Since it's tough for you to find support where you live, I believe there are also online groups for Food Addicts Anonymous & Over Eaters Anonymous. Good luck! I hope it works out for you not just to lose weight but to also take care of the healing stomach.


Height: 5'0"
Weight for WLS consultation: 216 lbs.
Surgery date: 2/13/17
Goal: -71 lbs for healthy BMI (about 145 lbs).
Current weight: 173 lbs
My profile picture is not me. It's my "FITspiration" body.

[summerset 5,265]

On 15. April 2017 at 6:46 AM, Tessa1988 said:

Thanks guys. I guess I need to look into a therapist. I live in a small town, so I'm not sure what my options will be but I'll google and see if I can find something.

You might also find some help reading books that deal with emotional (over)eating or intuitive eating, you don't have to wait until you find a therapist. (hermione53 already suggested that)

I guess you want to make your way out of the overeat-diet-overeat-diet-cycle and the surgery is a good start for this. Too many people stay stuck in this cycle or fall back into it after a while (look at all the "help, I've gained and can't get a grip on it" threads).

You seemed to have underestimated the power of emotional eating, so did many others. I felt it full-force after I stopped smoking some years after having lap-band surgery and the self-help books were tremendously helpful. The gained weight fell off again during several months without dieting or any 5-day-pouch mumbo-jambo and I'm still a non-smoker.

You can deal with this but you need to choose a strategy that suits your needs.