My story - lost 120lbs

[pvechiola 195]

The way I eat now to maintain my weight at a reasonable point is based on principles of intuitive eating. There is a lot of information about it online but the core info is in a book called intuitive eating by Evelyn Trimble. It's on Amazon. It is based around the idea that our bodies have a set point that they are comfortable at and that set point is a healthy weight because our bodies are always striving towards health. When I reached my lowest weight of 115 I started to get very depressed and basically anorexic, terrified of gaining weight back and still living my life on a diet. That can only go on so long and after a while your body will be able to eat more foods and more quantity and even sleeve and bypass patients can find themselves white knuckling it again to avoid gaining weight. This is because dieting, i.e. Nutritional deprecation, doesn't work in the long term. Your body knows your starving and starts to fight back by increasing hunger and holding on to extra calories by slowing your metabolism.

Intuitive eating is the natural way of eating we are all born with before we start dieting and messing with out internal cues. The basic philosophy is simple: eat when you are hungry, stop when you are full, allow all foods and honor your cravings. Eat regularly and respond to hunger.

This process has allowed me to stop dieting and to maintain a healthy weight post bariatric surgery while also being free to eat the foods I enjoy and crave. Maintaining was the worst part of this for me and thank goodness intuitive eating allowed me to find a way to make peace. I had gotten down to 115 at 5'6 and looked quite sick. I didn't know what to do so I just kept losing. When I realized how unhappy I was I decided to make peace and allow my body to settle and a healthy weight no matter what that might be. Intuitive eating helped me gain to about 128 and it's perfect for me. My weight stays very close to that range and I eat whatever I want at the the time. I never binge and I don't think much about food any more to be honest.

There is me at 115 vs 128. I feel much better now and I eat all kinds of yummy foods. I also have the energy now to run and lift weights on a regular basis and it's become a wonderful coping mechanisms for me.

You're working it girl! So great to see the outcomes of these surgeries. You look amazing! I am so jealous I want to buy clothes so bad, but skinny sassy clothes.

[bellabloom 2,467]

I'm want to share my story so that any of you who are in the fence about this can have a full picture of what can happen both bad and good.
I had gastric bypass dec 2014. My surgery was very very painful. The first two days I vomited a lot of blood and they had trouble getting my pain under control. They gave me a lot of narcotics. My dr, dr Thoman from Santa Barbara, barely checked on me. I was at cottage hospital in SB.
I went home after five days in the hospital. I was going okay but then. The mental challenge of not eating was no joke. It was something I was so used to. They had given me a ton of narcotics and I kinda used those to cope with the emotions of not being able to eat.
About a week later I started to have major pain in my upper stomach. I went back to cottage and they found stones in my gallbladder so out it came. I went home but the pain remained. My doctor was very absent during this time. I told him about the pain and I kept taking more and more narcotics to deal with it. He blamed my pain on the narcotics but I felt trapped in a catch 22. Take them or not take them.. either way.. pain.
Finally after several exploratory surgeries my dr decided to revert my surgery and make it into a gastric sleeve. After that my pain was gone but I was by now hooked on narcotics. I ended up having to go to a detox facility to get off of them. Worst week of my life.
I could barely eat anything during this time and dropped weight rapidly. After I was free of the narcs and started to try and eat. But I could not get anything solid to pass through my stomach. Months went by and finally I said- okay something is wrong. Every time I ate solids I threw up. I elected to go to a new doctor after my bad experience with dr Thoman. I just felt he didn't care and no loner trusted him and his bedside manner was terrible.
I went with dr Swartz in Fresno and he was great. I diagnosed me with a sever structure and did an endoscopy which opened it up. He said I had a ton of scar tissue from dr Thomans style of revision.
After that I gradually began to eat some solids and after many months is continued to approve. Needless to say I lost a huge amount of weight very fast and was loving that. However I had severe malnutrition. My hair fell out in clumps and my legs went numb. I have dumping syndrome and I also still
Sometimes vomit if I don't chew enough of just having a bad day or mix liquids with solids etc.
I feel the American health care system to be very lacking in post operative care. Also they pass out narcotics like they are candy which had a lot to do with my issues.
It's been over 2 years. I went from 240 to 115. I've since gained back to 129 and am holding there. I no longer diet, I just eat to fullness and try not to think about food very much. I run and lift weights daily and that has been the key for me to feel comfortable without having to stay on a diet forever which is impossible to do.
Reaching maintenance was the hardest part of this process and I had very little advice to help me besides to stay on a diet forever. Ones appetite does return and one is able to eat much larger quantities that early on. For instance, now I can eat almost a whole chipotle burrito. I decided dieting wasn't for me and embraced intuitive eating philosophies instead which help me maintain in a place I am happy with.
I still live with this surgery in a daily basis. food gets stuck at least a couple times a week and I have to throw up do to the pain. I can't eat too much or eat with liquids or I will have dumping syndrome. (Yes you can dump with a sleeve). I am happy but good is always an issue. I feel quite sick after I eat sometimes. It's always a struggle for me. I'm not sure if this is due to my complications or just the surgery itself. My best friend had bypass and she says the same thing.
On a positive note I have an amazing body. I really really enjoy my body and my energy and health and I would do it all again even though it was hard. I can run, chase my kids, work my active job, wear any clothes I desire. I feel very attractive.
If you are considering this surgery because you aren't able to live a healthy and energetic life at your current weight, than do it. It won't change how you feel about yourself on the inside and it could end up being replaced by other dependency issues... but at least you will be physically stronger and healthier. I suggest therapy for anyone that is going to do this. Healing comes from within.
Remember you will never again be able to eat to your hearts content. You won't be able to feel like you do now when you eat. This surgery will not help you maintain your weight loss forever and it's vital that you have realistic expectations. Try and make peace with food. Don't see it as an enemy but as a vital component to health.

I dealt with very little loose skin. Mostly on my neck and tummy. I am now having plastic surgery for it in Mexico which I will post about in the plastic surgery section.

On a side note, I you are considering vsg surgery in Mexico, I would highly recommend it. My care here has been extraordinary.


  

Another aspect I forgot to mention is that during the time I had my stricture- I relapsed into anorexia. I had an eating disorder very young and throughout my life. Wls surgery triggered it for me hugely and I had to go into treatment twice to get back into recovery. When I lost so much weight I found I could not stop and there was not bottom to my desire to lose weight. After wanting to be thin for so long it was very hard to see reason.

So part of this whole process for me has also been addressing my eating disorder through therapy and I'm happy to say I am now in recovery and have been for some time.

[maggieO 33]

Thank you for sharing

[Kenya80 6]

Thanks for sharing, you look awesome and you're Happy, which is the most important

[Redo2017 247]

I have been considering WLS for some time now and lurking on the site for a bit. I finally have my date for VSG: July 10, 2017. I am inspired by your story, especially because your beginning stats are almost identical to mine and we seem to have similar body types. (at least we did before your WLS!). Your after pics are a peek into future possibilities, which is helpful in getting over the massive fear that has begun to set in. What was it that finally inspired you to go through with WLS? Were you afraid of not being able to maintain the post-op lifestyle in the months leading up to your surgery? Thanks for any advice!

[Newme17 3,444]

On ‎3‎/‎30‎/‎2017 at 11:54 AM, bellabloom said:

without having to stay on a diet forever

This is my goal.

Congrats on your loss, glad you're off those narcs too. Blessings to you hon.

[bellabloom 2,467]

[mention=307767]bostongary[/mention], Would love to track with you and support each other.

However if what you said is actually true, then I think I am a girl. : ) (But I am not that cool or smart.) As I have obsessed about food most of my life. I don't think it is gender based as much as it is individual. I believe everything you said, but I think that is also unique to you.

I believe we all have our "real issues" which most of us are unaware of until the weight starts coming off. We also have our own "perceived issues" which are the issues we own and admit to. Sometimes those are the same, but many times they are different. A real issue maybe the abuse you suffered not related to food directly, but is a major influence on your ability to love yourself, or be in a vulnerable situation. Food relationship becomes the "perceived issue or symptom, your abuse remains the "real issue".

What I like most about[mention=235696]bellabloom[/mention] is her transformation from perceived issues by losing weight, to her real issues of her relationship with food and herself. With the honest transparency and vulnerability with how she navigated through both of them.

Some back-ground: This is my second procedure, I was banded 12 years ago. (With a lot of success. 375 to 230) But I can tell you, while I was successful losing the weight and keeping most of it off for 7 years, I was unsuccessful at dealing with the "real issues" during that time. As once the band was removed (for medical reasons), all the weight came storming back.

So while I conquered all my perceived issues and felt secure during those 7 years with the results to prove it, in reality, I failed at addressing my "real issues".

That really played head games with me gaining my weight back, as I thought I was over it. But reality doesn't change just because it isn't convenient or uncomfortable. So I had to come to terms that I needed a medical procedure again(!) to physically help me address my "real issues" which are mental/emotional based.

So now I have the blessing to try and learn and conquer my real issues again!

I can tell all of you who are having success losing weight, enjoy it, love it, Celebrate it, but don't let it blind you from other issues still under the surface. If you don't have them, hurray! I do not wish people to have issues they don't, but I was ignorant to mine because of the success of the surgery. It allowed me to ignore my real issues, instead of face them.

Wow. Amazing and well said!!! Yes of course. Our real and perceived issues matter. Our real issues matter the most. Our perceived issue is our inability to control ourself around food. Our real issue is why do we need to desperately try to conform our appearance to societal standards to the point we are willing to starve ourselves. Why is there so much self hatred.

In addition a real issue is that we have lost the ability to eat based on our bodies needs and instead we are experiencing over eating based on guilt and emotional pain and a reaction to dieting.

[Dianeg 18]

You look great!!!

Sent from my SM-G900V using BariatricPal mobile app

[Dianeg 18]

How long did it take you to lose your weight?

Sent from my SM-G900V using BariatricPal mobile app

[bellabloom 2,467]

How long did it take you to lose your weight?

Sent from my SM-G900V using BariatricPal mobile app

It took me about 9 months