What to tell people?

[OutsideMatchInside 10,166]

Tell people you are low carbing. Not a lie and they don't have to know you had surgery to help with Portion Control.

People are really not as curious as people think. Most people think diet and exercise work.

Not telling people isn't lying or hiding under a rock. First of they are asking a rude question to begin with. Losing weight and health really are private things, just because we live in a society where people tell all their business on social media does not mean that is how people are forced to conduct their lives. Privacy is invaluable.

When you tell people your business you are inviting them to comment on it.

OP has already told enough people that I seriously doubt this secret stays a secret anyway. With that number of people knowing, someone is going to blab it.

[AmandaWho 158]

I'm being sleeved on 19th April - I've told mum, my sister, Hubble and 1 friend. It is something really private that I don't feel comfortable telling people but I don't want to glibly say 'eating less and exercising' and perpetuating myth that will result in weight loss. Any suggestions for something vague but not dishonest to tell people?

I'm in the same boat. Only my mom, fiancé, and best friend know and I don't want to tell anyone else because I don't want to hear their two-cents. Just tell them you're working out and eating better, and that won't be a lie!

[Raheema 24]

Lol! If another person say," you don't need to do that! just eat right and exercise" I'm smacking em

[aquarious12585 13]

Lol! If another person say," you don't need to do that! just eat right and exercise" I'm smacking em

Yes!! My brother said the same thing when I first told him. Then I explained all the diets and exercise I've done and he got it. He said he really hadn't realized how hard it's been for me. Hes in full support now

[Raheema 24]

They don't realize. How hard this decision really is to say yes cut me open and fix me and they are really not supportive and don't know the struggle. I live on a diet for 10 years and. I'm still overweight! There's so much support here in the forum it's like we're family. My date May 8th dr. Cervantes my Dr was switched for some reason? So I'm excited

[kinipela24 80]

On 3/20/2017 at 2:40 PM, rudge said:

Thanks everyone appreciate your feedback. Worrying what other people think has always been a huge thing for me - on an intellectual level I know that it is stupid but at a gut evel it is primal if that makes sense! Something that I'm trying to do is just be more private about myself and stop this insatiable need to justify myself to everyone. Perhaps once I've practised that I may be able to move on and just tell people he truth without worrying about their reactions. Thanks again

I can COMPLETELY related to everything you said. You are not alone!

[JRaye 63]

I asked this same question a few weeks ago and most people said to not tell anyone because for those who did, said they got a lot of negative backlash from others. It seems most only told immediate family and close friends and co-workers they trusted. When others asked about their weight loss, they just said they were on a low-carb diet. I have only told a handful of people about my upcoming WLS. I don't feel it is everyone's business. I have already lost 40+ pounds on my own in the last four months so people are already noticing I am losing weight and they will just think I am stepping it up a notch after I have the surgery.

Good luck with what you decide to do. Don't let the busy bodies and the naysayers get to you! Also good luck with your surgery.

[S Ann 8]

I'm afraid to tell my mom, because she is super dedicated to the mainstream medical establishment. She would not approve of me going to Mexico for the surgery. So, I've only told my hubby, kids, one sister, and one sister in law.

[HeatherS. 230]

You don't have to go into details with anyone. If someone notices, you can just say "thank you" or even add that you're working closely with your doctors to improve your health.

Share only as much as you're comfortable with and don't stress too much.

[browneyesdebra 171]

Only people that know I'm having surgery is my daughter sister -in-law niece and best friend and she passed away March 23,2017 and like she said I'm going tell them I'm working closely with my doctors to improve my health and I change my eating habits

[JRaye 63]

6 hours ago, browneyesdebra said:

Only people that know I'm having surgery is my daughter sister -in-law niece and best friend and she passed away March 23,2017 and like she said I'm going tell them I'm working closely with my doctors to improve my health and I change my eating habits

So sorry to hear about the loss of your best friend. My heart hurts for you.

I haven't told one person in my family I'm having surgery. They are all blabber mouths.

Good luck with your surgery and sorry for your friend's passing.

[Lovingmyself83 67]

I've really only had one person that reacted quasi-negatively ("If that's what you want, I guess it's ok." and, "I couldn't do that, I want to lose the weight on my own.").
I think WLS is definitely becoming less stigmatized, especially here in the Midwest, where all the fat people live.

I can't stand when people say "I want to do it on my own" my response to that is well then do it. But as far as I'm concerned I decided to do something about it. wLS is not for the weak. We have to work hard and give up a lot of things to be successful. I decided not to tell many people but my family living at home at my sister. People are always going to say something. Good luck with your surgery. Mine is scheduled for April 13th and currently on liquid diet. It's going well. Not bad.

[MeltsIntoWonder 125]

27 minutes ago, ck2kramer said:

I can't stand when people say "I want to do it on my own" my response to that is well then do it. But as far as I'm concerned I decided to do something about it. wLS is not for the weak. We have to work hard and give up a lot of things to be successful. I decided not to tell many people but my family living at home at my sister. People are always going to say something. Good luck with your surgery. Mine is scheduled for April 13th and currently on liquid diet. It's going well. Not bad.

To be fair, the person who said that is doing it on "her own" - she's lost 50lbs through portion control/exercise, and was actually one of the people who inspired me to get healthy. I definitely know what you mean though. I fail to see how having elective surgery and changing my entire relationship with food and my body isn't also doing it on my own, but whatever.

Good luck with your surgery too! Mine is on Tuesday (4/4)!

[marylu 12]

I too said "I can do it on my own" & I lost weight but it just came back. I did Jenny Craig 3 times with having to loose the weight + 20 lbs. I'm sure that had paid for a home for Jenny. Then I did Nutrisystem, lost the weight & ended up with high blood pressure & high cholesterol. I'll be 1 year on June 23rd, had the sleeve done & I can finally control. Most people don't understand my emotional makeup. Remember, food will never be disappointed in you & I'm learning that it's not food will make me happy until you swallow.

[browneyesdebra 171]

4 hours ago, JRaye said:

So sorry to hear about the loss of your best friend. My heart hurts for you.

I haven't told one person in my family I'm having surgery. They are all blabber mouths.

Good luck with your surgery and sorry for your friend's passing.

Thank you very much I know I haven't told my mother because she is blabber mouth