Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Not telling Husband or Anyone



Recommended Posts

I don't think it's the greatest idea but you have to do you. If you are compelled to have the surg on your own, then go for it. But be prepared for the backlash when you return to your hubby. It may get ugly. Have you thought of telling him just before you leave. At least then he won't feel so betrayed and you won't have to listen to his negativity.


Sent from my iPhone using BariatricPal

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm no relationship doctor but I certainly would not go through a relationship where I couldn't tell my spouse something like this. However, that's just me.

Regardless of that, I hope you do what's best for your health and understand the surgery is not a magic fix, that psychological and nutritional issues (if any) should be resolved before you get the surgery done. You will most certainly benefit from having help post-op for several weeks, especially if you have kids and they're young. Your energy will likely go kaput.

If you have any family you can lean on it would be a good time to possibly dial them up too.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I am sorry you are in such a bad spot.
That doesn't sound like a healthy marriage, in my humble opinion.
Have you two tried marriage counseling?
That would be a start.
Having major surgery without telling your spouse is also not a good idea.
I think you need to work on your marriage before you run off to get surgery.
If he doesn't support you, or love you enough to support you then that is a whole separate issue.
Sorry to hear you are having these issues.
My wife and I are trying to get sleeved together.



Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I did tell my husband. He is my greatest cheerleader, which surprises me. However, I did threaten his life if he told anyone




Really? Do you think people will notice? I suppose It depends on your starting weight if people will question it.



Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites


Really? Do you think people will notice? I suppose It depends on your starting weight if people will question it.




Well you don't have to worry if people will notice I battled the same thing but I'm at the point where it's my life and I want to be healthy and I'm 18 now so there for I don't have to answer to no one(except my parents and they are by my side the whole way ) if you need to tell people how you lost weight just say you portion out your food technically that's what you are doing the surgery is doing it for you though .

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • cryoder22

      Day 1 of pre-op liquid diet (3 weeks) and I'm having a hard time already. I feel hungry and just want to eat. I got the protein and supplements recommend by my program and having a hard time getting 1 down. My doctor / nutritionist has me on the following:
      1 protein shake (bariatric advantage chocolate) with 8 oz of fat free milk 1 snack = 1 unjury protein shake (root beer) 1 protein shake (bariatric advantage orange cream) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein bar 1 protein shake (bariatric advantace orange cream or chocolate) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein soup (chicken) 3 servings of sugar free jello and popsicles throughout the day. 64 oz of water (I have flavor packets). Hot tea and coffee with splenda has been approved as well. Does anyone recommend anything for the next 3 weeks?
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        All I can tell you is that for me, it got easier after the first week. The hunger pains got less intense and I kind of got used to it and gave up torturing myself by thinking about food. But if you can, get anything tempting out of the house and avoid being around people who are eating. I sent my kids to my parents' house for two weeks so I wouldn't have to prepare meals I couldn't eat. After surgery, the hunger was totally gone.

    • buildabetteranna

      I have my final approval from my insurance, only thing holding up things is one last x-ray needed, which I have scheduled for the fourth of next month, which is my birthday.

      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BetterLeah

      Woohoo! I have 7 more days till surgery, So far I am already down a total of 20lbs since I started this journey. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Well done! I'm 9 days away from surgery! Keep us updated!

    • Ladiva04

      Hello,
      I had my surgery on the 25th of June of this year. Starting off at 117 kilos.😒
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Congrats on the surgery!

    • Sandra Austin Tx

      I’m 6 days post op as of today. I had the gastric bypass 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×