3 days out, remorseful, worried and depressed

[CocoNina 210]

I'm 3-weeks post op too. It's mentally exhausting to re-learn how to eat & drink & deal with the soreness. What gets me through it is seeing my results on the scale & fitting into smaller clothes. The pain & "suffering" is short term for the reward which is to lose weight & have the body I want.

You should see the psychologist the Bariatric clinic made you see before approving you or join a support group for Bariatric patients. Sometimes losing our old fat self is like mourning a loss of a person. Sometimes, I'm scared to lose to much but at the same time, it's what I want & asked for when I decided to cut 80% of my stomach off.

I hope you feel better soon.


Height 5'0"
Weight for WLS consultation: 216 lbs.
Surgery date: 2/13/17
Goal: - 71 lbs for healthy BMI (about 145 lbs).
Current weight: 185.2 lbs
My profile picture is not me. It's my "FitSpiration" body.

[krissyfattofab 68]

I am 8 weeks post op today. The first 4 weeks were pretty hellish. Dealing with emotions, lack of energy, wanting to eat and not being able to, regret - all of it. Between week 4 & 5 things started to turn around. I haven't felt any regret or sadness since then. My energy is back with leaps and bounds. Just Friday I completed a difficult 10 mile hike. I'm down 70 pounds since October 24, 2016 when I started my pre op process.

[Jamesarwin 10]

1 hour ago, krissyfattofab said:

I am 8 weeks post op today. The first 4 weeks were pretty hellish. Dealing with emotions, lack of energy, wanting to eat and not being able to, regret - all of it. Between week 4 & 5 things started to turn around. I haven't felt any regret or sadness since then. My energy is back with leaps and bounds. Just Friday I completed a difficult 10 mile hike. I'm down 70 pounds since October 24, 2016 when I started my pre op process.

I'm glad to hear it! Thanks for posting. Today's been dreadful for me but it's nearly bedtime and tomorrow is a new day! Only two day s left till purée food so at least I can get some sort of sustenance . Hope you're all well I'm down 29 pounds sijxe pre op diet about 25 days ago

[clc9 644]

This is the dumbest thing I have read on here in a while, although I will admit I don't read or post as much as I used to.
I enjoy eating out all the time. My personal life is pretty fabulous too.

Why are you trying to spread distrust and misery Anne?

She's been banned. Finally a banning I agree with!!

[Kim Mahoney 4]

I am nine months out, and do not regret a thing. I eat out all the time. I just eat differently & not as much. In fact, eating out is fun because I can always split a meal with my companion...cheap!

HW 235, size 18

CW 122, size 3

No regrets!

[Jamesarwin 10]

4 minutes ago, Kim Mahoney said:

I am nine months out, and do not regret a thing. I eat out all the time. I just eat differently & not as much. In fact, eating out is fun because I can always split a meal with my companion...cheap!

HW 235, size 18

CW 122, size 3

No regrets!

That's great!

today is a much better day! I woke up and decided not to let my anxiety beat me! I'd like to state to anyone who's reading this who's in a similar position that of course it gets better! Everything always gets better. We've all had times in our life where we are so down and regretful but it always works out! My anxiety is what is making this so difficult for me not the actually surgery(even tho they are both hard) I'm going to miss eating huge amounts so much! But I decided to do this surgery because I couldn't control my portions and I do wish I knew more before my surgery because I'd like to have opted for a slightly larger stomach (maybe 10oz) or so as I think that would have suited me much better!

but from speaking to people who are 3+ years out it does seem to stretch over the years so hopefully I'll be able to drink a full cup of coffee one day! :-)

keep ep your heads up guys and girls it's a fun and stressful ride but I'm 29 pounds down 12 days after surgery and starting puree soon!!! Wooo

[Kim Mahoney 4]

I drink coffee every morning. It just takes a while...one cup lasts all morning. And you will find that you will eat till full again, but your new "stuffed" won't be seconds or thirds, but rather, 2 or 3 bites, and once your brain adjusts to that new normal, you will be okay with it.

Btw..the sleeve doesn't really stretch. If it does, people are eating wrong. Many think they stretch it because they gain weight nack, but 99% of the time it is from consuming carbs, sugar, and crap. My doctor said when she gets patients who think their sleeve has stretched, she has inserted her bougie & it hadn't.

[Jamesarwin 10]

1 minute ago, Kim Mahoney said:

I drink coffee every morning. It just takes a while...one cup lasts all morning. And you will find that you will eat till full again, but your new "stuffed" won't be seconds or thirds, but rather, 2 or 3 bites, and once your brain adjusts to that new normal, you will be okay with it.

Btw..the sleeve doesn't really stretch. If it does, people are eating wrong. Many think they stretch it because they gain weight nack, but 99% of the time it is from consuming carbs, sugar, and crap. My doctor said when she gets patients who think their sleeve has stretched, she has inserted her bougie & it hadn't.

From speaking with people who are 3+ years the generally do saybthey can eat a little bit more. Maybe it's just the stomach relaxing or maybe they are just more comfortable with it and know what to eat . There seems to be a lot of debating going off some surgeons say it can stretch some say it cannot. I guess time will tell. I for sure am hoping it does. I would like to learn new ways of eating and new habits and over the years be able to eat slightly more (no where near pre op amounts) but I'd like to be able to treat myself to a burger or something one day lol! But I'm early on in and I am missing my comfort foods. Maybe this will change with time too and I will see food more as a fuel for my body rather than an activity or an emotional crutch.

when you say 'if it does people are eating wrong' what do you mean? Do you mean people are constantly eating till they're super full and eventually stretching it? Or?

im still really struggling with not being hungry and having to force feed myself everyday. I don't like it and I am hoping my hunger returns somewhat. I don't even want a cup of coffee in the morning yet which is getting me down as I love coffee! But I seem to be forcing myself to drink a small cup in the mornings :-(

[Kim Mahoney 4]

1 hour ago, Jamesarwin said:

when you say 'if it does people are eating wrong' what do you mean? Do you mean people are constantly eating till they're super full and eventually stretching it? Or?

James, what I mean is that many people think that just because they can tolerate any foods that means they can consume anything. So, they return to their old eating habits and think it is okay simply because they are not eating nearly as much as they used to. I know people who eat sugary things, consume vast amounts of carbs, and worst of all, drink soda. The empty calories will completely undo all the hard work. Soda is the worst! Many think that as long as it is diet, it is okay; it's not! Soda can literally destroy your stomach, cause leaks, and all sorts of complications. It is the number one saboteur of WLS.

So, while these first few months are difficult and a struggle, use them to retrain your brain while you are retraining your body. The hardest part about this is the brain. My nutritionist always tells people to stop eating with their brain and eat to nourish and fuel the body. Many of us got fat because we turned to food for comfort (you just admitted as much yourself). We need to find new ways of relieving our stress, anxiety, and emotions. For me, I have taken up various hobbies...crocheting, raising chickens, I got a puppy. Right now, I am hatching baby chicks. Yes, I live in the country, but even city folks can find things to occupy their time rather than eating...go for a walk, feed pigeons or ducks at the park, etc.

It also has helped me to start telling myself, "I really don't like ___. It will make me sick" I really don't like sugar (I was an addict before WLS) I will get sick if I eat that piece of pie. I really don't like soda (I used to drink 3 cans a day) It will corrode my stomach. If you tell yourself these things enough times, your brain will begin to believe it. Now, if I consume something with sugar, after telling myself I don't like it and telling myself it will make me sick if I eat it, I literally get sick if I eat it. I haven't had a soda in almost a year now and at times I really crave it, but I don't give in because my brain truly believes it will do more damage than the brief satisfaction.

[ANSeaboch 0]

Hey James,

I am so on the same page! Burpy hiccupy and oh so sad at almost one month out. As I explain to some it's like I broke up with a boyfriend who is now off limits and dating everyone I know right in my face lol.

I think talking about it helps. It's helped to read stories from the other side of the altered diet, but it also feels good to read stories from people "in the trenches." We can do this! Warm liquids sipped have added some relief. Lemon Water, Decaf tea.... warm lemon water lol. I'm still lethargic but feel better after liquid vitamins, a nausea pill, and what little Protein Shake I can choke down.

Fight the good fight my friend. We'll remind each other that this is temporary.

Onward!

A

[Jamesarwin 10]

Just now, ANSeaboch said:

Hey James,

I am so on the same page! Burpy hiccupy and oh so sad at almost one month out. As I explain to some it's like I broke up with a boyfriend who is now off limits and dating everyone I know right in my face lol.

I think talking about it helps. It's helped to read stories from the other side of the altered diet, but it also feels good to read stories from people "in the trenches." We can do this! Warm liquids sipped have added some relief. Lemon Water, Decaf tea.... warm lemon Water lol. I'm still lethargic but feel better after liquid Vitamins, a nausea pill, and what little Protein shake I can choke down.

Fight the good fight my friend. We'll remind each other that this is temporary.

Onward!

A

I'm about 2 and half weeks out now. Today I nearly hit my goals, I'm eating better drinking better and my depression is almost Gone. I still hate the fact I can't eat as I love eating. But that was my problem and I'm moving on! Today I woke up feeling great for the first time since surgery. Almost feel like myself again! Yesterday was bad though felt like I was going to pass out, but thay was because I hadn't been eating right the few days before! Do your best to eat the right stuff and drink as much as you can :-) it's a battle but you gotta keep fighting!!!!! 35 pounds lost!!!!

wooo

god I miss McDonald's large toffee lattes :-( I can manage half of a regular now tho! Lol

good luck in life!

[HomerThompson 3]

Want to give you my background in terms of depression - I'm 29. I have been depressed maybe 3 times my whole life. When I consider depression, I say for longer than 2 days at a time. This surgery made me depressed. It's completely normal. I had my surgery in December, was with my family for 3 weeks, and then went home (I live by myself) and that's when I got depressed.

I consider myself a very happy person and even this surgery got me down. To make you feel better, I am almost down now 100 pounds 3 months post op (lost about 20-30 pounds a month before surgery). It will pass.

[Jamesarwin 10]

1 minute ago, HomerThompson said:

Want to give you my background in terms of depression - I'm 29. I have been depressed maybe 3 times my whole life. When I consider depression, I say for longer than 2 days at a time. This surgery made me depressed. It's completely normal. I had my surgery in December, was with my family for 3 weeks, and then went home (I live by myself) and that's when I got depressed.

I consider myself a very happy person and even this surgery got me down. To make you feel better, I am almost down now 100 pounds 3 months post op (lost about 20-30 pounds a month before surgery). It will pass.

Thank you for your reply. It always helps!

everyday seems to be getting easier, still some hard days but i am starting to feel normal again. Hoping things carry on!

Well done on your weight loss!! Very proud . Im down 34 pounds since surgery now :-) nearly 3 weeks

good luck in life !