Newly Single Mom

[AshleighN14 3]

Hey all!

So I'm a 31 year old, newly divorced, Mom of an amazing 2 year old boy. I'm a year post op VSG, down 102 pounds and only 9 pounds from goal. My ex husband also had VSG at the same time I did, lost a significant amount of weight and began an affair with a co-worker.

I'm finding it to be difficult to adjust to life, not only adjusting to life in my new body but now also single. The prospect of dating is more than slightly terrifying. It can get lonely at times, not only dealing with the emotional part of WLS but also now starting over.

Is it this scary for anyone else??

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

[TheRealMeIsHere! 863]

Congrats on the awesome weight loss!!

At first, it is difficult to adjust to single life. There is no need to jump into dating, just yet, though. I've been single since 2007 and wouldn't have it any other way!

Get to know the new you, do group activities with friends, read, start a new hobby, etc....If/when you do start dating you will be that much more prepared and confident in a relationship. OR you will find that you prefer to be single, it does have it's perks as well!

[TinaKimani 64]

It's scary for me too. My son will be two in April. My divorce was finalized in December and I had my bypass in January.

Everything happened so close together. But you just have to stay positive and know that life will work out the way it's supposed to.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

[Hoping052017 97]

Being a single mom is a scary thing in and of itself. I've been a single mom of three for almost 4 years now and it still scares me. Having a strong support system is a big plus. I don't know what I would have done if I was newly single and going through wls. It's insane enough now trying to do it after over 3 years of singlehood.

Sorry about your ex. I like to think that people get what's coming to them. I have found that Karma really is a beach.

As for the dating thing...I've tried, but so far no good. Not that I haven't met some really neat people along the way, but from experience...take your time. Like someone else said, get to know the new you and spend as much time loving on that wonderful little one of yours. They grow so fast. You give birth to them and then it seems like you blink and they are all grown up and you ask yourself "What happened? When did I miss that?"

I believe you are a really strong lady to have gone through the wls and have been successful. Just use that same strength and determination that got that weight gone in everything you do and you'll be great.

Congratulations on the weight loss and have faith that when the time is right to date, you'll know.

[larry971 279]

Hey all!

So I'm a 31 year old, newly divorced, Mom of an amazing 2 year old boy. I'm a year post op VSG, down 102 pounds and only 9 pounds from goal. My ex husband also had VSG at the same time I did, lost a significant amount of weight and began an affair with a co-worker.

I'm finding it to be difficult to adjust to life, not only adjusting to life in my new body but now also single. The prospect of dating is more than slightly terrifying. It can get lonely at times, not only dealing with the emotional part of WLS but also now starting over.

Is it this scary for anyone else??

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

That sucks....believe me, I've been there..but your young pretty and smart enough to ask for help. You'll be fine, concentrate on you and your son. The rest will come.

Sent from my SM-G935V using the BariatricPal App

[AK_Bookworm 116]

I've been a single mom since 2007. I started dating when my daughter was 3 and got pregnant again only to end up a single mom with two kids. I haven't dated since and have been so focused on working to take care of them that I gained weight. I'm having VSG in May and I'm ready to gain my confidence back but I am honestly comfortable and ok with being single and not sure I want to date. Focus on adjusting to your new life and getting a solid routine down for you and your son. Dating will fall into your life and routine when the time is right but if you try and force it into your life relationships won't work because you won't be ready. Congratulations on weight loss... you're a lot stronger than you may realize right now and once you take the time for you and get yourself in a good place mentally, physically, and emotionally ... everything else will fall into place

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Edited February 4, 2017 by AK_Bookworm

[larry971 279]

I love having someone who is happy to see me and I them. But it seems no one wants that nowadays.

Sent from my SM-G935V using the BariatricPal App

[TheRealMeIsHere! 863]

I've been a single mom since 2007. I started dating when my daughter was 3 and got pregnant again only to end up a single mom with two kids. I haven't dated since and have been so focused on working to take care of them that I gained weight. I'm having VSG in May and I'm ready to gain my confidence back but I am honestly comfortable and ok with being single and not sure I want to date. Focus on adjusting to your new life and getting a solid routine down for you and your son. Dating will fall into your life and routine when the time is right but if you try and force it into your life relationships won't work because you won't be ready. Congratulations on weight loss... you're a lot stronger than you may realize right now and once you take the time for you and get yourself in a good place mentally, physically, and emotionally ... everything else will fall into place

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Wonderfully said!!!