Best friend totally unsupportive.

[Mrs Swen 14]

Below is just a snippet of some of our conversations about my journey. She is very unsupportive and it's hard to ignore. She is my best friend. I share everything with her and it's hard to not share this with her but when I do share she is beyond unsupportive. ☹️

 

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[Travelher 915]

That is just weird. I don't get why some people are not supportive. I have yet to meet someone who wasn't supportive.

What is her rationale?

[Mrs Swen 14]

That's the thing... I don't even know her rational. My husband wasn't on board at first but he came with to my consult and realized how much I wanted it and wanted me to be happy. I just don't get it. She was super successful with weight watchers and maybe she thinks there are other ways. Idk

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[Travelher 915]

That's the thing... I don't even know her rational. My husband wasn't on board at first but he came with to my consult and realized how much I wanted it and wanted me to be happy. I just don't get it. She was super successful with weight watchers and maybe she thinks there are other ways. Idk

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Doesn't sound like a very nice person from the texts. None of my friends have ever talked to me like that. They don't read like "I'm worried or concerned for you". Sorry you aren't getting support there. I'm glad your husband is supporting you.

Edited February 3, 2017 by Travelher

[Newme17 3,444]

Wow. That's just terrible. She's got a problem. What happened to loving unconditionally? Even if we don't agree on something someone does or whatever, and we love them, we should always be there for them regardless. Sorry, but I wouldn't call her a best friend anymore. Just my opinion.

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[Newme17 3,444]

Hey, I'm a skinny girl trapped in a fat body. and more often than not, thinner people tend to be healthier. So, why not?

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[clc9 644]

Yikes. I think you need to stand up for yourself more here! She's being pretty awful and you sound like you're bowing down to her. She's not stating opinions worthy of respect. Those would be "I'm worried about you", "I'm concerned about your reasons for doing this, help me understand", or "I may not like that you're having surgery, but I support you."

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[mzzmisty 22]

I would probably choose to not speak to her anymore.about it .. Even though she is your best friend she could be more supportive even if she doesn't agree.. Look for support other places .. I love this forum and also I use Instagram a lot and love all the people I've met on there .. Good luck

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[strengthin#ers 195]

Good thing your not doing it to please her. Do what you have to do, for what EVER reason you want to do it. Just because she's your friend doesn't mean you owe her any explanation for anything. That's your friend, you had to know that she's a light weight hater!!! My sister WHOM I LOVE so much, I knew she would be very very very negative about it in so many ways. That's just my sister I've known her my whole life. So guess what.....SHE WILL NOT KNOW UNITL ITS DONE. I haven't told her and will not tell her. My mom knows and respect my decision, because she knows my sister will ultimately try to make mountain out a mole hill. Do what you have to do, if she decide to come along for the journey..... COOL!!! If not, pray for her and enjoy the new you. God bless

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[Numbergurl37 201]

Do it for you, maybe she will come around maybe not, either way its your body your choice and never let anyone stand in your way. Best of luck

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[Daisy Day 91]

I had someone like that in my life, key word is HAD. I walked away, after surgery I made the choice to surround myself with positive people, not everyone knows that I had surgery but every one that I surround myself with is positive.

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[BigViffer 3,544]

I can totes relate. I told my bestie of 25 years about my surgery and I didn't get support either!

After I told him I had surgery, all he said to me was, "Huh... I can still eat in front of you, right?"

In all seriousness, stop talking to people about it if they aren't on board. You're just wasting your efforts.

Sent from my phone. Please forgive brevity and spelling.

[Numbergurl37 201]

I can totes relate. I told my bestie of 25 years about my surgery and I didn't get support either!

After I told him I had surgery, all he said to me was, "Huh... I can still eat in front of you, right?"

In all seriousness, stop talking to people about it if they aren't on board. You're just wasting your efforts.

Sent from my phone. Please forgive brevity and spelling.

Couldn't agree with you more

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[cmlee 12]

My best friend is completely supportive and another really close friend who is completely against wls has stated her support for me as well despite her own opinions about it...I have another really close friend who is obese and has always been as I have and she is not a fan of wls either and rather started her journey again with weight watchers as I have begun this journey towards wls. I knew she wasn't a fan of it but still told her about my final decision and a few things here and there that I have done along this journey towards getting the surgery and she surprisingly has been very receptive to the things I have shared with her and turns out she will be taking off and being there for me day of surgery assuming I get approved... people who are TRUE FRIENDS will cheer you on despite their own opinions not negate you or be rude because she simply doesn't agree with such an important life altering decision as pursuing this..hopefully you are blessed with a much more supportive friend than she is in the days to come and if she has to go along with the weight you intend on losing then so be it!! This is for you and NO ONE else! Best wishes dear!

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[parrott06 18]

Almost the same thing happened to me, but more harshly delivered. I had surgery last week and haven't spoken to her since before surgery and don't plan to speak to her again. I've decided to surround myself with positivity. The recovery isn't a walk in the park and the last thing you need is her and her negative thoughts. This is your year to focus on your health and making your quality of life better.

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