Why I Stay Here

[gowalking 10,790]

Hi all. I'm not going to go into all the drama around here. You all know what's been going on so no need to hash that out. I'm well aware that as I am four years on these boards, I've been around for alot longer than most vets and certainly alot longer than the new folks I've seen come and go. The reason why I stay even with the nonsense going on is noted below. If you want to hear/read at least this vet's thoughts and opinions, feel free to continue with the following:

Without pointing fingers, I can see that my suspicions are likely accurate. When people leave, they often do so because they have/are gaining the weight back. I've seen some of my peers (those who were losing as I was losing back in 2013 and 2014) come back here and kudos for them for doing so. To a man (or woman), they are saying they have lost their way, gained the weight back, etc. etc. etc.

I've also gained back. I was as low as 115 lbs. and now I hover in the mid to high 130s. Some of my clothes are too tight and that bothers me. I feel bad when I see the scale go in the wrong direction, but I fight it every day and try not to have that number creep up any further. Being on this forum and going through my struggles, helps to keep me accountable. If I leave, I fear that I will cut off the thing that has helped me the most, which is to hold myself up as an example of how this WLS so profoundly changed my whole life.

Not everyone has gone through the same metamorphis as I have and I understand that. But to say that my life was horrible when I was obese and immobile and now is normal because I fit anywhere and can walk again, can't even explain it all.

I'm happier and more satisfied than I've been in years. I think more of myself in that I take care of me. I work, I exercise, I take joy in my family, heck, I even plunged into the dating world again and somehow managed to find the guy I call MOMD (man of my dreams). He has brought me such joy and happiness and I know we would never have met had I not changed my life. And yes...I dated a number of frogs before finding this prince.

So here I am day after day. I don't post as I used to and truthfully, I don't read much in the way of folks asking specific questions about post op things. I'm too far out to really respond to those queries. But for the folks who are interested in maintenance...and living with the disease of obesity even if we are no longer obese, I am here for that.

Some days are good, some are not. I try to live by example and not espouse any particular way that others should approach their weight loss journey. We all make this journey our own way and while there are many similarities, we are all different and have to understand that. I've seen so many posters who were my support drift away and while I hope that they are just out there living their lives as successes in terms of their weight loss, I fear that for many of them, they have slipped up and gained the weight back.

For those just starting out or fairly new to the process, it's all about losing the weight. For those like me, it's about maintenance. And with any lifestyle change, the maintenance is the hardest part. I've very few peers left on this forum but I stay because if I go, I have none of you to make me accountable.

I just hit my four year anniversary. I always posted in prior years, but did not this time but I decided to put this out there and make it my 'anniversary' post.

Here's hoping that what I wrote helped someone out there, be they years away from their surgery, or those who are pre-op and everyone in between.

[Alex Brecher 10,512]

Happy "anniversary"!

[MrsSugarbabe 727]

Very well stated.

Thank you for staying, @@gowalking!! You are an inspiration and I appreciate your honesty and wisdom based on your experience.

Happy "anniversary!"

[JamieLogical 8,708]

Glad to still have you around!

[Beautiful Diamonds 59]

You are appreciated!Happy Anniversary ????????????

R4C????

[TXJess 98]

Thanks for staying and being inspiring to us Newbies.

[2ndSpring 350]

Happy Anniversary!!!!

[doxaholic 252]

Congratulations so happy you stayed i believe there are more vets on this site but i feel as they may be waiting for things to settle before coming out again.

Sent from my SM-G920P using the BariatricPal App

[ssflbelle 829]

Thanks for staying around. It is very much appreciated. I hope other vets will post again as I do miss their wonderful suggestions, advise and years of experience.

[Daja 48]

Happy anniversary! Glad you are here sharing your thoughts and journey with us.

Sent from my iPad using the BariatricPal App

[shedo82773 1,236]

Happy Anniversary!! And thank you for staying and being honest about the struggles. I am 3 and 1/2 years out. I have maintained my 124# loss for 3 years. So I it is so different being in the maintance than the losing phase. Lets face it watching and feeling all those changes is really liberating!! Now we have all of the NSV's to keep us going. When you have been at goal, people stop talking about the weight loss so we all need to find something else to keep us going. For me it is coming here getting and giving support. Because if just one person is helped thru something that is holding them back then ALL IS GOOD with me. Again Thank you for your post.

[B-52 7,113]

I'll be 6 years in a few weeks....110% successful, never had any problems.

Good restriction, portion sizes limited. Hunger and cravings next to nonexistent.

Certain foods I cannot eat, others I gave up intentionally...so it's all good.

Exercise regularly, struggle at first to be motivated but after seeing results it became more and more of a habit.

I do not believe in Maintenance, I do today what I did last year, and the year before that and the year before that.

It is a new way of living that has developed...not a diet.

I have no fear of gaining any weight back as long as my band remains constant.

It has gotten to the point that WLS is old news, most people don't remember when I was obese, and new people will never know.

Don't think about it all that much anymore, go about my daily routine. Same as it ever was.

I enjoy things that people here turn into hot topics....

So you see, being successful makes me an odd ball...someone who does not fit in on this forum. And people have been critical of my success even though it is first-hand life experience. Can't possibly be true...it's only a tool! A concept I do not belive in...wait for it,...see what I mean???

They are all newbies and we are worlds apart.

There is simply nothing for me here...I come around just for the reading entertainment and every now and then, like now, I put my 2 cents in for whats it worth.

There were many, many people who were here when I first came..it was called the "Lapband Forum" then.

I followed their success, and they too, like me, found nothing here for them anymore so they moved on.

Imagine this was a website for people just getting started driving a car...lots of good discussion on how to get started, hints and tricks to get it right, and some frustrations and fear of failure...

Parallel parking can be tough....and yes people have car accidents. Even veterans.

But after you have been driving for a few years...whats the point of staying here? Time to move on.

[summerset 5,265]

I enjoy reading your posts when you come around from time to time. Hopefully you'll never experience complications with your lap-band.

[doxaholic 252]

B-52 hey those two cents you just posted now was packed with more valuable information for me than you will ever know. I understand that you feel like there is not much for you here i suppose if i am as successful as you one day i may and would probably feel the same way. As for now i am thankful for this website as i find so many of my silly questions that i was not brave enough to ask but someone else did answered. And now wondering whether i can keep this up long term. Thank you for sharing and i am sorry to see you go.

Sent from my SM-G920P using the BariatricPal App

[Julie norton 2,850]

I'm very glad to see some long term vets showing up here. I feel like I need some group support.

This is a long and sometimes lonely road. Especially without all those lunch and dinner offers that come up all the time. I can only make about 1/2...

Thanks Liz for hanging around. You helped me navigate a bit of Wls with the devastation of widowhood..

Hoping many people with years of experience stick around!! I appreciate you!