Family and friend rejection

[pvechiola 195]

They are arrange of sizes. I hope they come arround. I gave my fiance 3 months to adjust to it and he called it a unnecessary surgery and didnt support me so i broke the engagement off yesterday. It's really hard thanks for you guys ... Atleast you all support me

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My mom was so opposed to the surgery I decided not to have it, now after almost 2 years I still lose and gain the same 20-25 lbs all day everyday, I am back to my nutrition classes and have about four months to go. My mom is acting like she's going to disown me but she's my best friend and she's just scared and won't change her mind but I am not doing this for her and she isn't the one carrying around an extra 80 - 100 lbs every day.

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[logen000 15]

They are arrange of sizes. I hope they come arround. I gave my fiance 3 months to adjust to it and he called it a unnecessary surgery and didnt support me so i broke the engagement off yesterday. It's really hard thanks for you guys ... Atleast you all support me

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My mom was so opposed to the surgery I decided not to have it, now after almost 2 years I still lose and gain the same 20-25 lbs all day everyday, I am back to my nutrition classes and have about four months to go. My mom is acting like she's going to disown me but she's my best friend and she's just scared and won't change her mind but I am not doing this for her and she isn't the one carrying around an extra 80 - 100 lbs every day.

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Thats exactly how i feel ! Im so sorry you feel it too !

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[pvechiola 195]

Is you finance over weight? How about your family members? Very often these reactions are about their issues with weight. Someone else making changes threatens them.

You are so young and your life is just starting. Please don't live your life to please others. And, as Hollyhock just said, think carefully about getting married to someone who gets angry at you for wanting to improve your appearance and health.

My experience that my fat friends have been the least supportive. Even the ones who don't know I have had WLS but notice that I've lost some weight manage to piss me off. One of them recently told me she thought I'd lost enough weight! Seriously? Um... I weigh 235 POUNDS, I am morbidity obese.[/quote

Maybe he is just trying to make you feel good by saying its "unnecessary (meaning he loves you the way you are)". Sounds like he thinks you are doing it just for insecurities and looks. Which is understandable. Try not to be too hard on him. He just needs more education on it.

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I had a hard time trying to get my family to support me but they just don't want to so screw em . They even refused to take me to the hospital so I have a best friend on standby, thank God for great friends, also his sister had the surgery and she did great .

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[O-Town Body Rock 148]

This is why I told no one prior to my sleeve surgery. Best thing i couldve done. After the surgery, I did tell some close friends when i went on a girls trip and boy did the judgements flow!! Now that I'm considering sleeve to bypass revision, i told my mom i was "considering" it and she called me a few days later and told me i was gonna die on the table, yada,yada,etc. Told my boyfriend i was "considering" the revision surgery, he flipped and went on a "join the gym" rant. So back to dont ask, dont tell for me.

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[Tufflaw 463]

This is why I told no one prior to my sleeve surgery. Best thing i couldve done. After the surgery, I did tell some close friends when i went on a girls trip and boy did the judgements flow!! Now that I'm considering sleeve to bypass revision, i told my mom i was "considering" it and she called me a few days later and told me i was gonna die on the table, yada,yada,etc. Told my boyfriend i was "considering" the revision surgery, he flipped and went on a "join the gym" rant. So back to dont ask, dont tell for me.

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I'm not familiar with the sleeve to bypass revision. Looking at your numbers on your profile you've been extremely successful with the sleeve, what is the benefit of a revision (NOT judging, just genuinely curious).

[jhemp85 106]

As everyone has mentioned, this is your decision. Many times people respond in a negative way because of fear? Whatever their fear is, is theirs. You have one life to live and you should live in a way that makes your happy and proud. Yes it is great to have support, buuut at the end of the day, the decision is yours. You are putting yourself first to take care of your health and anyone who loves you is going to be there be it now or later. I also suggest looking at ClusieL on YouTube. She is awesome! Will be praying for you and sending you positive vibes for your surgery next week! *hugs*

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[O-Town Body Rock 148]

@Tufflaw No problem! I gained all of my weight back and I have GERD. No excuse here; I went back to my old habits and my sleeve is stretched. (For some reason, I can not update my signature....)

[O-Town Body Rock 148]

...and when I told my un-supportive boyfriend that I hated the way I felt and looked and this was going to affect our sex life, he changed his tune...!!

[Tufflaw 463]

Ah, makes sense then. I have GERD too, have you tried Prilosec? The generic form is Omeprazole, I've had a prescription for a few years so all I pay are co-pays.

Re: The revision - have you looked into some type of support group or counseling to work on underlying issues? If you "went back to old habits" after the sleeve, the same might unfortunately happen after a revision. I know a few people personally who have had bypass surgery, lost a ton of weight, and put it all back on a few years later.

[O-Town Body Rock 148]

Ah, makes sense then. I have GERD too, have you tried Prilosec? The generic form is Omeprazole, I've had a prescription for a few years so all I pay are co-pays.

Re: The revision - have you looked into some type of support group or counseling to work on underlying issues? If you "went back to old habits" after the sleeve, the same might unfortunately happen after a revision. I know a few people personally who have had bypass surgery, lost a ton of weight, and put it all back on a few years later.

I have but I have not "acted" on it, if you know what I am saying. Within the last two years, I had ALOT of emotional, unfortunate events happen and I am an emotional eater and also BIG time binge eater. I haven't pulled the trigger on the revision just yet. I got a script from my PCP for the GERD so we will see what happens. I am at a crossroads right now. I just may try the pouch reset, etc. I dont know....

[logen000 15]

Thats what i was doing but everyone kept asking about what surgery i was getting so i blabed it out last night

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[Thick2Thin2016 63]

Well I had one person get snippy with me about it.i asked point blank when my back knees and shoulders were shot by the time I was 45 were they going to stop by and wipe my booty for me because being overweight all my life my body is only going to get worse

[Tufflaw 463]

Ah, makes sense then. I have GERD too, have you tried Prilosec? The generic form is Omeprazole, I've had a prescription for a few years so all I pay are co-pays.

Re: The revision - have you looked into some type of support group or counseling to work on underlying issues? If you "went back to old habits" after the sleeve, the same might unfortunately happen after a revision. I know a few people personally who have had bypass surgery, lost a ton of weight, and put it all back on a few years later.

I have but I have not "acted" on it, if you know what I am saying. Within the last two years, I had ALOT of emotional, unfortunate events happen and I am an emotional eater and also BIG time binge eater. I haven't pulled the trigger on the revision just yet. I got a script from my PCP for the GERD so we will see what happens. I am at a crossroads right now. I just may try the pouch reset, etc. I dont know....

Well, I wish you the best of luck! Re: the GERD, once I started taking Omeprazole it was like magic, all symptoms immediately stopped.

[VSGVega 26]

I've decided to tell some people but have received mixed reactions. I'm excited and it's my decision only so I'm ignoring bad reactions and not dwelling on it. I know what I'm doing and am eager to prove it. It's not the easy way. It's a lifetime commitment. I'm astounded by the courage and support I see here. Thankful for this community.

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[BigDog Bryan 262]

This is a decision that requires a level of courage that a LOT of people don't have. Change in general is not always welcome, so there will always be resistance from someone in your life. We ALL commend you for taking the step to change the trajectory of your life. Those who are fighting you are doing so from their own fear, not their love for you.

Don't make their fear your problem - you will be the ONLY ONE on the operating table, and their words will probably become even angrier as your success becomes more evident. This is an important life lesson for you - not everyone in your corner is truly with you. The same thing will happen when your career takes off and you start making more money than some of your current friends and extended family. The same thing will happen when you get a house (your first, or the first that is bigger than theirs). Not everybody wants to see you succeed on your own terms. They want your life to be on their terms, and not according to your own life journey. Be Excited for yourself !!! Doing the right thing means that life will work out for you JUST FINE.