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Feelin' sorry for myself

Jazzzyjay

By Jazzzyjay, in Gastric Bypass Surgery Forums

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Jazzzyjay    222

Jazzzyjay
Posted

Just got done with all my pre op stuff. Surgery is Jan 17. My surgeon told me she won't do my surgery unless I have someone to look after me and help me for at least the first 48 hours after being discharged. I have no one. I'm not exaggerating. My soon to be ex husband kept me totally isolated. I'm feeling so sad that I don't have a soul that will help me. I'll lie to her if I have to. Please don't judge. I'm a tough cookie. But it's just so heartbreaking that I am absolutely alone in this world.

BTW...How do you even make friends at 40?

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southbound    159

southbound
Posted

The fact that he is soon to be ex is a good start. There are women support groups. Churches, Salvation Army, women's shelters... I'm tough as nails but I was glad I had someone to adjust pillows and get me stuff I needed when I just was exhausted. Don't lie to her, it could be dangerous. My church is always there for me and that is where my best true friends are. They cooked for my husband and son. And have for many other people who have had the need. If case need be, hire a sitter.

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Jesus loves you!!!

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James Marusek    5,244

James Marusek
Posted

It will be important to find a way of getting home after surgery. You will not be able to drive. Also, generally they write the prescriptions for you when you are released from the hospital and you will need to go and pick these up on the way home.

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Nicetomeetyou 82    41

Nicetomeetyou 82
Posted

How about calling around to the local nursing college? I know a lot of nursing students look for side jobs to pick up some extra money, if you can swing something for 48 hours that might be a good place. They could come over after school study and stay with you to make sure you are ok.

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asantiago    89

asantiago
Posted

Hello. Please don't get discourage. Try calling your insurance company and let hem know that you need home health care for at least a week. Most insurance provide these services. I work in a hospital and before getting discharge you can let the nurse know you need help at home. Try this first. What state and town do you live in ?

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clc9    644

clc9
Posted

Search for local home health care services online. You could have someone come in for just those days and pick you up from the hospital. Funnyish story - I live in a very vain (read plastic surgery), pricey part of the country and they even have hotels that have post-surgical care programs where you can have nursing staff take care of you (can't imagine how much that costs, but it would be kind of cool!)

As for making friends, it does take a little effort, but you can do it. I started by going to Meetup.com meetups for walking. I clicked with a few people and sucked up my courage to suggest meeting outside the meetups for walks. It worked! That evolved into doing other activities like movies, theater, shopping, coffee, meals and now I have some very close lifelong friends.

A post-WLS surgery support group is another place to meet likeminded people. Put yourself out there just a little and you will find your tribe!

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Jazzzyjay    222

Jazzzyjay
Posted

Hello. Please don't get discourage. Try calling your insurance company and let hem know that you need home health care for at least a week. Most insurance provide these services. I work in a hospital and before getting discharge you can let the nurse know you need help at home. Try this first. What state and town do you live in ?

Thank you. I'm in Omaha Nebraska

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It will be important to find a way of getting home after surgery. You will not be able to drive. Also, generally they write the prescriptions for you when you are released from the hospital and you will need to go and pick these up on the way home.

My surgeon is giving me my prescriptions a week before surgery. I'm taking a taxi to and from the hospital.

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Jazzzyjay    222

Jazzzyjay
Posted

Search for local home health care services online. You could have someone come in for just those days and pick you up from the hospital. Funnyish story - I live in a very vain (read plastic surgery), pricey part of the country and they even have hotels that have post-surgical care programs where you can have nursing staff take care of you (can't imagine how much that costs, but it would be kind of cool!)

As for making friends, it does take a little effort, but you can do it. I started by going to Meetup.com meetups for walking. I clicked with a few people and sucked up my courage to suggest meeting outside the meetups for walks. It worked! That evolved into doing other activities like movies, theater, shopping, coffee, meals and now I have some very close lifelong friends.

A post-WLS surgery support group is another place to meet likeminded people. Put yourself out there just a little and you will find your tribe!

Sent from my iPad using the BariatricPal App

Great ideas. Thank you!

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Jazzzyjay    222

Jazzzyjay
Posted

The fact that he is soon to be ex is a good start. There are women support groups. Churches, Salvation Army, women's shelters... I'm tough as nails but I was glad I had someone to adjust pillows and get me stuff I needed when I just was exhausted. Don't lie to her, it could be dangerous. My church is always there for me and that is where my best true friends are. They cooked for my husband and son. And have for many other people who have had the need. If case need be, hire a sitter.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Jesus loves you!!!

Thank you. I'll look for some support groups.

Sent from my Y538 using the BariatricPal App

How about calling around to the local nursing college? I know a lot of nursing students look for side jobs to pick up some extra money, if you can swing something for 48 hours that might be a good place. They could come over after school study and stay with you to make sure you are ok.

Never thought of that. Thank you

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boiseboz    5

boiseboz
Posted

Don't they have bariatric support groups through your Dr? Mine does and would be a good place to meet people and already have something in common.

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boiseboz    5

boiseboz
Posted

Clc9. You must be in L.A.!

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Jazzzyjay    222

Jazzzyjay
Posted

Don't they have bariatric support groups through your Dr? Mine does and would be a good place to meet people and already have something in common.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Yes, they told me today I can start after surgery. Feb 1st would be the next one. I'm definitely going.

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