Say what?!

[SharBear617 146]

So, went yesterday to see the NP/Dietician at my surgeon's office for my 6 month post op follow up. Was happy they were thrilled with my progress so far (LOTS of inches off measurements, down 67 lbs since first visit Feb 2016, down 52 lbs since June surgery), but we had never talked before about what their post op weight goal for me was, and what my goal weight was. My "say what?!" moment, was when I was told they had a goal weight for me of 145-160 lbs. My goal weight for me? 125-130 lbs. Bit of a difference. I'm 5'2", and have probably a medium frame, so I don't think my goal weight is really off.

And before I get feedback, I know for many it's "not about a number on the scale." Yes, I know, and it isn't for me either, it's going to be about how I feel, how fit I am, energy levels, etc, so my "number" may change. But the goal weight in my opinion is to keep me accountable, so that when I reach maintenance, I can answer to the scale. What kind of got me though, was the Dietician's response, when I said what goal I had for myself, was in so many words, not gonna happen. Well sorry, but I didn't go through a surgery and re-route my intestines to reach a weight that would still put my BMI in the "overweight" category. I know, even though we have to live and die by BMI to qualify for surgery, general concensus is it's a load of crap that doesn't factor everything in....but still.

So, I'm curious to hear of anyone else who felt the surgeon's/NP/Dietician's expectations for you were a little lower than what you expect of your results?

BTW, am feeling AMAZING already, have ZERO regrets about surgery, and have welcomed the changes it has forced me to accept and incorporate into my lifestyle. AND, loved seeing the comparison photos they took of me on my first visit (although really difficult to look at) and the pics yesterday, made me very proud!

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[thunder32 65]

If you can be healthy and make your #'s....go for it!!! Healthy keyword and sounds like you are doing it

thunder32

[James Marusek 5,244]

Goal weight is an artificial number. I think that my surgeon decided my goal weight would be 190 pounds. In the end I dropped down to 143. But 190 is a comfortable number to measure success by. Because if I got down to 190 I would be satisfied and it was achievable. In the end I looked at morbidity tables and determined the ideal weight would be on the high side of NORMAL BMI. It is good to have a little extra fat on your body for the times when you experience an accident or medical condition in the future. It is this fat or extra body weight that your body relies on until you recover.

[esskay77 785]

They just have historical averages to use to show what others have done to sort of predict what they think you will do. It isn't anything set in stone. Do what you need to do to get where you need to go.

[j16 166]

My program's goal for me seemed really high also. It actually made me question whether surgery was worth it. I suspect a higher goal helps their statistics appear more successful. I am aiming for the high end of a normal BMI.

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[clc9 644]

My surgeon uses those actuarial tables and said for my height (6'), my ideal weight was 153. I would look emaciated at 153. 170 looks great on my frame. He then used the 153 number to give me an idea of where he would expect my weight to settle after surgery based on what his patients are generally able to keep off and that is around 180. I would be fine with that. 183 is the high end of the normal BMI for me. I'll take normal!

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[Who'sThere 331]

A couple of ideas here...not in any way researched or anything, just Amy's wonderings...

For those who have been morbidly obese for a long period of time, do our bones become more dense? I wonder if the constant weight and pressure put on them makes them that way. One reason I wonder is that in previous yo-yo weightloss episodes in my life, I found clothing fitting me much differently than at that weight in the past. For example, I wore a size 16 as a high school senior weighing around 160. At 173 in my 20s, I was in a tight 12, loose 14. Also, my friend who weighed the same as me but was TALLER wore a bigger size. At 5'10" and 170ish, she was in a 16/18, while I was in a 12/14 at 5'3". Wtf???

Here's another thought. I have PCOS. My previous gynecologist (who is now in administration and no longer sees patients, thus new gyno for me) was best friends with the man who literally wrote the book on PCOS. He told me long ago, that my body had a "happy weight" that would always be above what BMI charts said was ideal for me. So, perhaps long term obesity along with other medical conditions make your surgeon consider what he/she deems realistic for you, not as a means to stifle you but to help you feel successful at a weight they feel is likely for you.

I have my goal setting at 135. That is the high end of normal on the bmi charts for my height. If I get there, that will be awesome! If I don't, I'll be okay with that. Why? I weighed more than that in middle school. Lol. I wasn't "fat" then, but I was a little bigger than my peers. Most of my friends were in size 3 or 5. I wore a 7. Nbd. My main goal is to be healthy. My endocrine system is all out of whack. I want normal tests. I want to stay on one dose of synthroid for more than a couple of prescriptions. I want to no longer take meds for insulin resistance. I want to avoid BP or cholesterol meds. I want the arthritis in my hip and knee to be bearable. Mostly, though, I want the energy and stamina to play with my child. I have an almost 4 year old. (One week from today!)

I want to be able to play with her at the park or in the yard, not sit on a bench. To me THAT, so much more than a number on a scale or in the tag of my clothes, will make me feel successful.

I have probably rambled, but I hope you understand my point and my intent. Best of luck to you. This is not an easy road, but it's a worthwhile one!

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[Who'sThere 331]

Oh and fwiw, my surgeon won't set goals for us. If we want a goal, we set it ourselves. This is a change from 7.5 years ago when I had lapband. Back then, he did set goals. His entire program has been changed (all for the better) since then. I love my surgeon and his whole group!

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[SharBear617 146]

They just have historical averages to use to show what others have done to sort of predict what they think you will do. It isn't anything set in stone. Do what you need to do to get where you need to go.

Great point about their averages, thanks!

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[SharBear617 146]

My program's goal for me seemed really high also. It actually made me question whether surgery was worth it. I suspect a higher goal helps their statistics appear more successful. I am aiming for the high end of a normal BMI.

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Very good point as well, makes sense.

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[SharBear617 146]

@Who's There....very intersting theory about the bones because that is true; you can tell how much weight a person bears based on the thickness of the bones. It is also why people (mostly women) who have been very thin their whole lives develop osteoporosis at a much higher rate than women who have carried additional pounds. Definately food for thought (no pun intended, lol). And same here, main goal is feeling great and also doing what I can to control my weight, to hopefully live a much longer and happier life. Thanks!

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[GBLady41 393]

For me, I will not accept 1 percent of fat more than what my ideal weight is, which is 140-145. I am 5'7" and that weight puts me a little higher than smack dab in the middle of normal weight. I did not have this surgery to accept less. I don't care what any doctor or nutritionist says. It's my goal. I still remember what I looked like at 155 lbs and I had at least 10 more pounds to go to get to the weight I'm supposed to be at. I won't settle for less. My NSVs include getting my health back and being able to work out like I used to; to go hiking when I want; to be able to do my career with the most versatility. But I will not budge on that weight, because I KNOW I will get there.

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[Vinasu 621]

My surgeon sets patients' goal weight as 66% of excess weight. She says that's realistic for most patients. I exceed that month 4. My goal weight is still 20 pounds away.

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[cdeisroth 420]

My surgeon didn't set a goal weight but at my last appointment I brought it up. I mentioned that my goal was 125 (I'm also 5'2). He said that based on where I currently was, I may not be happy at that weight and that the healthiest folks have a bmi of 25-27 long-term (he's not a fan of the bmi chart and says it's outdated). Anyway, as I've continued to lose weight I've readjusted my goal to 136.4. That is the very high-end of the normal weight for our height. Once I get there, I'll decide if I want to go lower. I'm currently 140, a size 6, and a small top. I never realized I was "small-framed" and always thought I was big boned. Now that I'm close to goal I'm realizing that 125 may be too small for me.

The point, set a goal that you are comfortable with and work to achieve it, but allow yourself to be flexible along the way. As your body changes, allow yourself to let go of the number and truly figure out what is best for your body and health.

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[tanyamann32 84]

My dietitian and I did not discuss it until l after the surgery. We are pretty much on the same page 70 kilograms . I am in total agreement with your post.

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