Chickened out- Am I crazy??

[mrgrta 0]

Well, I chickened out of my surgery last week. After 12 months of medical supervised weight loss programs, sleep study test, medical records, psych eval, etc., I was finally approved by my insurance company in August for lap band surgery. I was so excited I couldn't stand it. I followed the liquid Protein diet to a tee and lost 12 lbs in 2 weeks. However, 1 week prior to surgery, I started reading the threads on complications and I totally freaked out!! I canceled my surgery the day before I was scheduled to have it done. Now I'm sitting here thinking that I have made a huge mistake. My approval is good for 12 months and I can get back in next week if I want to have it done, but after reading about vomiting, slipped bands, erosion, PBing, minimal weight loss, I can't help but be scared. I have two small children at home that need their mommy to be around, and honestly if it weren't for them, I would have been on that operating room table without a doubt. I am so scared that something will go wrong. Sorry for the long rant, but I can not make up my mind.

Kat

[TracyinKS 7]

Yes...

but that is me

[Daisalana 33]

My rule.. I NEVER opened the 'complications' folder here, until post-op.

I just knew it would add to my anxiety, and I of course had second thoughts until I was there.. and then right before surgery, I was still thinking of leaving (all because I didn't want a cathedar.. which I never got).

They gave me some happy meds, so I relaxed and just sailed through.

So glad I did.

I think you need to re-evaluate.. stop looking at complications.

Hell, I've ended up having a complication.. and while I'm disappointed, and nervous about going back under the knife.. I've yet to say "I wish I hadn't done this".

[babs0101 1]

I too have been reading the complications about lap-band. But as nervous and scared that I am, nothing compares to the excitement of my finally starting this journey come Oct. 5th. I have waited 40 years for some hope with weight loss. I honestly feel this is it. If this doesn't work, then I was meant to be fat forever and live a short life. But it will work because I want it to work, and I"m willing to work at it to make sure the band becomes my best friend. If I give up, I've only given up on me and given in to obesity.

[JennR 0]

I was more scared of the surgury than the complications. I think I watch to many Discovery Health shows. I was crying uncontrolably and they had to give me something to calm me down. I'm so glad I went through with it. I know how scary it is to have someone that depends on you. I have a 4 year old and a 2 year old, and I don't want them to grow up without me. However, they might have to if I didn't get this weight thing under control. I also don't want them growing up without a mom to do fun things with. My son wants to go to Disneyworld. I can't fit in the rides. Try explaining that to a 4 year old.

[Serena 0]

You're not crazy in my book. I may have chickened out as well except that through a twist of fate, I was prescribed a beta blocker 3 days before surgery because of abnormalities in my cardiac stress test (further testing after surgery showed that my heart was perfectly healthy). The mechanism of beta blockers also blocks anxiety. In fact, I felt elated!

I had the surgery and I'm so happy that I did. My only regret is that I can't seem to tolerate salads or most vegetables. My recovery has been totally smooth. I admire you for putting the needs of your children first, but you'll be able to be a more active and contented mom if you feel better physically.

As a member of this forum you have an advantage--you can check out any concern you may have and learn what's normal and what is potential trouble so you can get in to see the surgeon early.

Good luck to you in your decision.

[Mom2Sassy 0]

I was scared too, and I thought maybe I was being selfish to take the risks involved with surgery to lose weight and feel better about myself. Also I paid out of pocket for the surgery, so it was a huge financial investment too.

I have a 10 year old daughter, a 16 stepdaughter and an 18 year old step son.

But, I looked at the risks I was taking by being obese. Diabetes runs in my family, heart disease too. I decided that getting the band would allow me to be here for my children, and someday their children too.

I have lost 40lbs so far, and I am a much more active and involved mother. I have more energy, I get fewer headaches and have fewer digestive/stomach problems.

My youngest has noticed the difference in me too.

The other day I suggested the family go for hike (something I would have never done in the past) to some Water falls near our house. We climbed down a big hill off the path to get to the water and then back up the hill to get back to the car. I pointed out to my daughter that I wouldn't have been able to do that 40lbs ago, and she said, "Yeah, you probably would have been home with a headache."

Only you can decide if this is for you. Yes, there are risks involved. But you take a risk everytime you get in a car, walk down the street, or just get out of bed. Life is unpredictable, only God knows what is in store for us. You have to decide if the risk is worth the benefit. I am almost 1/2 way to goal, it's been a struggle getting use to this new lifestyle, but I would do it again in a heartbeat.

We are going to Maui in December, and it is so nice to know that I will be able to put on a swimsuit and snorkle with my family without feeling like I am embarassing them or myself.

I wish you the best on your journey.

[lmedina 0]

hey kat,

I can totally relate to you. I was soooo scared. I am a single mother with 2 children. I kept thinking if I died who would take care of them..I was terrified of going under,I had never done that before but, I realized just like some of the other posters said,i was more prone to dying from obesity complications then on the table. I made it through fine. No complications only successes!!! talk to your dr. about you concerns and take a little more time to feel more comfortable about the surgery..good luck to you..

[WASaBubbleButt 41]

Kat...

If you want to be around for your kids, what are you waiting for?

Complications from obesity are a given, it is going to happen and likely already has. Complications from banding are minimal.

So you have a choice, die young from obesity or take a small chance on complications?

Either you are ready to give up large quantities of food or you aren't. No inbetween. If you are not ready to give up food don't blame 1-3% complication stat with banding vs. a 100% promise that being fat will do you in before your time. Come to terms with the *real* problem so you can stick around for your kids.

[Betsyjane 2]

People come here for support when they have problems. The rest of folks are usually out living their lives and don't post as often. So it seems like there are lots of complications when the incidence of complications is actually low.

I don't call PBing a complication exactly. It's more a learning process. A swift punishment, er, reminder when I'm not following the plan.

I no longer take meds for diabetes. I no longer test as having osteoporosis. I can cross my legs and see my feet!

[Paulax 8]

I too also almost jumped off the operating table. Lol! I am so glad I didn't. I am now 14 months out, 85 pound lighter and so ever grateful that I went through with it.

I have personally never been to the complications forum, I will go there if I ever need support from complications. I go look at the Before and after Threads, THAT is what inspired me. Still does. I ask myself, would ANY of these men and women have been better off if they had not gone through with the surgery. In my case the answer is, 'Uh no!'

Good luck with your decision, whatever you decide. We are here for support. hugs...

Paulax, mom of 3 younguns.

[Guest ZenGarden]

Hi Kat,

I can tell you that MOST of those things NEVER happen to everybody. If you stay on this site long enough, it can scare the bejesus out of you. If you WANT to lose the weight, GET THE BAND.

[docsdeb 0]

Mrgrta,

Wow, I almost did the same thing. I didn't even have to go through half of what you did or the time you put forth to do it. I simply (uh yeah?) made up my mind on Sept 3rd and called on Sept 4th and got the ball rolling and I am to be banded in Mexico on the 28th.

I started reading this forum like a drug addict. I read everything I could. Then one night I read a horrible thread about one person's bad experience with her band and I freaked! Almost had a total meltdown and I am not that kind of person. It had me almost cancelling my appt, losing my deposit and getting a refund on my plane tickets. What happened next is what this forum is really all about. SUPPORT!!!

The responses I got almost immediately were supportive,firm and to the point, and just what I needed at the time. I was and am so grateful for them.They were from newbies as well as being years post banded and it very much helped. To those of you who responded (and you know who you are), if you ever read this thread, thank you very much!!!!

I am a stonger person everyday and my decision to go through with my band has even more empowered me. You have to think this through and work you way through it yourself. I sat back, took a deep breath and did some pretty hard thinking. In my mind food is no different than heroin is to a drug addict or nicotine to a smoker. You get the picture. I need help and that is why I am going through with it. I am 51 years young and I figure this is my last shot at being as healthy and I can before God calls me home.Am I scared? Hell yeah, everyone on here will probabaly tell you the same thing. I don't know a single person who LOVES to be put to sleep and have surgery. It's just a necessary step and will be over and done with before we know it. You just have to make the right decision for you. Just find a quiet place and really noodle it out.

The best thing is, this forum is not just about the complications. It is about the support no matter what is going on. If you decide to go ahead and I hope you do, you couldn't have a better bunch to have your back afterwards. Best of luck to you no matter what you decide and God bless you good!

docsdeb

[Guest ZenGarden]

One other important note: while there are NO guarantees regarding surgery, you definitely need to choose a reputable surgeon. Mine is one of the best in Georgia. Perhaps some of the things we've read about on the news occurred because of a few less-than-standard surgeons.

[Alex R. 0]

Only you can decide what is right for you.

But you have to remember that the few people who do have complications come here for support. There are a vast many others with no problems who do not post.

I find however, that reading about complications helps me to behave in a way that often will help prevent complications. A lot of those posts are "don't let this happen to you" warnings.

Being banded was the best thing I have ever done for myself.