Considering Lapband..should I? or shouldn't I?

[sewenup1 0]

Hey Bridget,

I'm not banded yet but the idea behind not drinking whilst eating is that the Fluid will help wash the food past the band and you will not feel as full. You can drink with you meal, but it might slow down your weight loss.

The thing is that the band is only a tool. It's there to help you eat less, but what you eat is up to you. If you eat fattening foods, or drink a lot of your calories you can still gain weight. You still have to make the lifestyle changes.

Before you decide whether to have the surgery or not you need to make a list of what you will gain if you are banded - a healthy life, a longer life etc and what you will lose - drinking whilst eating etc and decide which is more important to you.

The thought of half a cup of food to me was horrific ( but then I was told that is the equivalent of a very firmly packed half cup - not a half cup of lettuce), but my mother died at 53, her father at 57 and her mother at 73. I'm now 47. I don't want to die at 53.

Don't rush into a decision, make sure it is the right one for you.

Good luck with your decision making.

Danna :ranger:

[iluvronniejr 0]

Thank you for that Donna, that is what I wanted and expected out of the lapband.. now 2 questions 1) do you drink with meals and 2) do you EVER consume soft drinks? I know you can't drink them like you used to but do you ever drink them?

Bridget:)

[faithmd 14]

I rarely take a sip, I simply don't want them. It's weird, your tastes do change after banding. Everyone's are different, so I can't predict what you may or may not want after being banded, but I remember saying to myself "My tastes won't change, that's silly." And they did. I have little to no interst in soda at all, I took a few sips and really, I was uncomfortable, felt like a balloon in my belly. That was enough for me. Many docs are revising their original reccs and saying it may be okay to have it 6 months 12 months post-op. But for many of us, it just doesn't taste the same as it did. Besides, it leaches Calcium out of your body, and you are hard pressed to get your 64oz of Fluid (non-caloric, NON CAFFEINATED-why? because caffeine not only is a diuretic and we need all the fluid we can get, but it also can make you hungry) in in a day, why would you want to add soda on top of it?

[ndmom 0]

Bridget, this is Penny.......the other scared girl on your thread. I can relate to what you say about "I eat because I want to eat." Actually, that is what scares me. That is what I hear from alcohol and drug addicts who are fighting treatment. Even though their health, career, family are on the line....they won't consider stopping the destruction. It's the addiction that has them convinced that they are drinking or drugging because they want to. The fact is, they drug and we eat because we are addicted. You and I are faced with early deaths and yet we still are hanging on to the lifestyle that will take us from our families "just because we want to." I agree with IndigoGirl, you and I need to have a plan beyond just the band and diet. We need to have a plan to address our addiction. I am glad your husband loves you just the way you are but with your family history, he won't have that luxury for long. I am a health care social worker, I watch young people (50's and 50's) die every day from earlier life choices. It isn't pretty and the families suffer so deeply. Love yourself and your husband as much as he loves you and be healthy to grow old together. Maybe now isn't the right time for the band, but it is the right time to do your addiction work. Here's to us and our future!!!

Penny

[Pattypoo1 0]

I have been reading all of your posts. I find this info very interesting and very individualized. In my opinion, I will use the band to eat only enough to sustain life. I want control over the food, I no longer want the food to control me. I will find something else in life to enjoy, I don't want to get satisfaction out of food anymore I am tired of it. No more, what should I eat...it will be this is what you will eat, eat it and be done with it and move on. I will no longer have to dwell on it, should I or shouldn't I, the answer is no. No longer will I waste so much energy on these decisions. It is all in black and white. Eat it, log it, and go focus on something else.

It was just like when I was taking Alli, and people would bring Cookies and goodies to work, the idea of eating that stuff repulsed me due to the consequences, so I stayed on the other side of the room. A year ago I would have been the first one to the dish and the last one to leave the dish. I found staying away to be no problem. So I know I can stay away from that stuff forever. It is no longer important!

Thanks for listening. It's all in your mindset.....

[IndioGirl55 32]

Really thank you for the honest comment. I can handle people being honest with me. Things you say I might not like, but in the end I know there true and truth is always welcome in my court. Believe me I hear what you are saying. And I keep thinking ok.. food, death.. food, HBP, food death.. I know my risks, that is why I am here looking into this, I don't have any of the symptoms that come with being overweight, but I know if 5 years look out I know they will come.

I just worry if I spend $1,000's getting it and can't do it because mentally I still want the food, then what. And maybe I should seek a psychologist if that has honestly never crossed anyone's mind. I maybe different. Everyone else seems to be going into this thinking this is my new life and I will do whatever it takes, I am going into it thinking, bye to my old life and feeling a loss for the foods I will never be able to eat even in small portions... I would think it's a mental thing as well, and that is where I fear I would fail because if I had that kind of mental control Jenny craig, weight watchers etc would work.

I really am scared, and the fact I am a going to hospital in Mexico where I feel I won't have adequate follow up care scares me too. I can't fly to mexico every 2 weeks for support. But I am a self pay and with 4 kids, I can't afford 40,000 for this surgery and my insurance won't consider lap band, only RnY gastric bypass and I can't get my head around the fact that rearranging my insides is any more healthy then being fat in the long run.

Please feel free to hit me with all the tough love you have. I do need it, but at the same time if anyone else feared what I fear let me know. If you worried about the foods you couldn't have and the mental aspect of getting past the eating, tell me how you conquered that or infact if the lapband helped you conquer it.

Bridget Sweetheart - You are the same age as my son - so maybe I will be your lapband mom :party:- I am glad to read that you accept my comment as they were intended - to raise awareness not to hurt - I too beleive in honesty and am so glad that you are receptive to it as many aren't.

You are not alone in your fears - Giving up "your best freind food" is a hard thing to rap your mind around - I had the same feelings too. But think about it - is food really your best freind - would you your best friend be killing you slowly but surely. When you read Last Meal Mentaltiy - this is what we are talking about - thinking we can't eat again so we stuff ourselves prior to surgery - I gained 5 lbs from 5/31 to 7/6 doing just this. I ate the foods that i can still eat - but that are unhealthy - white gravy & rice - brownies (my downfall) etc - unhealthy food. I can still eat these foods if I chose to and have had a brownie but just 1 not the whole thing. It's about retraining yourself - to eat healthy 98% of the time and maybe once a week have a treat - but again for some once you eat one you gotta have the whole thing - right now i don't cuz i want to lose weight I want to live and i know that even with the band i can eat them but i can't eat as much. I have come to the realization that they really aren't that fantastic. When I was 36 i didn't have any medical problems either - but as the years pass and each one added a few more pounds - all of a sudden -there you are taking blood pressure meds.

Sweetheart you have 4 kids and you need to be there for them... I think you need to take some more time and soul searching before you make any decisions.

I don't understand why your insurance would cover bypass and not the band - imho i don't think they can do that and maybe you should look into appealing that decision - but again I am not an expert.

There are alot of people here who go to mexico, but i truely understand the fear of not being able to get the followup care - maybe you should talk to some who have been banded in Mexico to see how they handle it - go talk to "Wasabubblebutt" she was banded in mexico and is about 8 lbs from goal -(not i gotta warn you she can come off a little strong - but she is a nurse and imho very smart - she is a little bit more ridge in her diet so just take that into consideration as everyone here does things differently and you gotta make it work for you)- but i guess if you can handle me, you can handle her truth too.)- I was lucky that my insurance covered it. As for support -I get mine here on this site. My hospital has a support group but it's mostly bypass - and i would have to drive 20 miles just to go - it's easier just to jump on here to get my support...

Good luck Bridget - and I am really happy that you are aware that I am comming from the heart and not trying to hurt you... :D

xoxo

Janet

[IndioGirl55 32]

Bridget, this is Penny.......the other scared girl on your thread. I can relate to what you say about "I eat because I want to eat." Actually, that is what scares me. That is what I hear from alcohol and drug addicts who are fighting treatment. Even though their health, career, family are on the line....they won't consider stopping the destruction. It's the addiction that has them convinced that they are drinking or drugging because they want to. The fact is, they drug and we eat because we are addicted. You and I are faced with early deaths and yet we still are hanging on to the lifestyle that will take us from our families "just because we want to." I agree with IndigoGirl, you and I need to have a plan beyond just the band and diet. We need to have a plan to address our addiction. I am glad your husband loves you just the way you are but with your family history, he won't have that luxury for long. I am a health care social worker, I watch young people (50's and 50's) die every day from earlier life choices. It isn't pretty and the families suffer so deeply. Love yourself and your husband as much as he loves you and be healthy to grow old together. Maybe now isn't the right time for the band, but it is the right time to do your addiction work. Here's to us and our future!!!

Penny

Penny - Well said - you hit the nail on the head !!!! :clap2::clap2::clap2:

[mjsafari 0]

Soda - drank some before, never drink it now, it tasted terrible the one time I tried. DH on the other hand - 64OZ Diet DP EVERYDAY before - now never drinks any soda. He said he doesn't even have any desire for it. We do drink iced tea some, but we do try to minimize our caffeine intake.

Steak and Turkey - no problem for me. They need to be moist and I have to take small bites, but they go down fine. The only thing I feel like I have given up is bread. Do I miss having a sandwich or a burger - sure I do, but I can everything but the bread, so that is what I do.

Mental - now this is a difficult road. If you don't think your ready - Your NOT. I thought I was ready and still at times get frustrated. I ate because I wanted to, it had to do with hunger sometimes, but I ALWAYS made bad choices. There was not one healthy thing about my pre-band diet. Did I love it, sure, but it was killing me, even if I didn't have any co-morbidities. food still has a very strong hold on me, but the band does not allow me to overeat. I love it and hate it at the same time.

Only you can make the decision that is right for you. As some one suggested, seek professional help if you can and make a list of pros and cons.

Good Luck!

[Amber 0]

At the time I decided to go ahead with Banding I was already borderline diabetic at the age of 32. I take 3 (yes that's right 3) blood pressure pills a day. I was heading down a path that would eventually lead me to an early death by either stroke or complications from the diabetes. This was NOT ok with me. I wanted to be around for my kids, grandkids and great-grandkids! I have a 6 year old son that I would do ANYTHING for and one day my own mother looked at me and said then why don't you LIVE FOR HIM. This was a real turning point for me because what she said was so true. If I loved him that much then why wouldn't I do anything possible to be here and healthy for him? She also said that the way I feel about my own son was how she and my dad felt about me and they were truly concerned about my health.

This is definitely a very personal decision for everyone but for me my son is more important than ANY addiction could ever be. It is very important to recognize that over-eating is an addiction and most people that suffer from any type of addiction suffer from either depression or obsessive-compulsive disorder. You should be seen by a psychologist for an evaluation to make sure you do not have an underlying mental health issue that could sabotage your success. I am not ashamed to admit I suffer from both depression and OCD and since starting on medication I have kept my impulses in check. You might be amazed what you discover after talking with someone.

I wish you only the best in your journey and hope you discover what will work best for you. Look at those beautiful children of yours and ask yourself if you would do it for them?

[Daisalana 33]

I have an issue with eating emotionally. I decided to go see a shrink about it, but the earliest they can get me in is the end of Oct. I'll see how that goes! They said he specializes in eating disorders, and told me to join some group.. and I said.. you realize, it's OVER eating, I'm not anorexic or belemic. And she said she's not sure if there's over eaters in the group, but I could still go and share. And maybe on some big broad spectrum, it boils down to we have some sort of issues with food.. but I'll be damned if I sit my big butt in a chair and try to relate to someone who can't eat.

[sewenup1 0]

My Dr has ok'd soft drinks as long as they are diet ones. You have to remember to drink them slowly so that you don't take in to much air with them - so you can't gulp them down. I find it really difficult not to drink with meals, but I think waiting 1/2 hour to drink is a small price to pay if it means that I will live longer and be able to enjoy life longer.

I know of people that are banded and can eat anything - just smaller portions, while others have trouble with certain foods particularly white bread. The thing is that you have to eat slower because your food has to be well chewed - so while you don't eat as much, you do get to savour the taste a lot longer and feel full.

The other thing to consider is that when you reach your goal weight you can experiment with other foods - if you start to gain you drop the fatty foods, if you don't gain, then try a little of another favourite.

Yes you will have to be on watch what you eat, just like on any other diet, but the band is there to remind you when to stop eating - so as long as you don't cheat, the band will long after real hunger but you have to learn to deal with mind hunger.

Good luck

Danna :gluck:

[suecasb 0]

Bridget, I have a lot of the same fears. First I am afraid that my insurance won't approve me...then I'm afraid they will.. and I will have the procedure and it won't work for me! I come on here and read everything and I talk to people that have had these same fears. This is a great support group and I know this is the right choice for me... but only you can decide if it's right for you. Just keep reading and asking questions and good luck with what ever you decide.

[ndmom 0]

Penny - Well said - you hit the nail on the head !!!! :clap2::clap2::clap2:

Thanks....now my action needs to match my insight! Keep an eye on me IndigoGirl, you have good tough band love for us newbies!!

And Amber, thanks for mentioning OCD, a factor much under diagnosed in overeaters.

Penny

p.s. Got my surgery date yesterday...Nov 6. Scared....excited, scared, excited......

[IndioGirl55 32]

Thanks....now my action needs to match my insight! Keep an eye on me IndigoGirl, you have good tough band love for us newbies!!

And Amber, thanks for mentioning OCD, a factor much under diagnosed in overeaters.

Penny

p.s. Got my surgery date yesterday...Nov 6. Scared....excited, scared, excited......

Penny

CONGRATULATIONS ON GETTING YOUR DATE 11/6 :clap2::clap2::clap2:

I am so happy for you !!!-I know how JAZZED I was when they called me with my date (7/17) - i thought it wouldn't be until August...

Penny - you will ususally find me in the "how is weight lose for those over 50+" thread and Lucky #7 (july 07 support) or you can always seach members list to find my name and pm. me.

Go, look for Nov 07 monthly support group and join that, these people will be just like you - and you can always contact me, when you get scared or have any questions.

I am in no way an expert on the band (but have a tad bit of knownledge as i have researched it for 2 yrs) - but am expert (imho) on being fat and the issues (mental & physical) that go with it - I can be pretty insightful sometimes (if i do say so myself - and you can see i am so humble:p)

You are on your way to becoming a healthy strong woman...

xoxoxox

Janet

[drstan1 0]

Your post really hit home I was banded 3/08 and had similar considerations 9 months later I still have same thoughts however my Internist said I have never been healthier my BP is stabilized blood sugar normal lipids best ever

Still hungry at times, need to get this fill thing corrected,, a key to this procedure ,lost 20 of my 35 lb goal I know I will not pigout today, I cannot, that is the key benefit to will I live longer?, probably, who knows??? I would do it again however your life will change a trade off this eating malady is always a tradeoff. You will still be able to go out and enjoy food small bites and chew chew chew. good Luck