Negative Nellies!

[Aggiemae 739]

One of the two people I told before surgery pretty much stopped being my friend, in fact I was hospitalized for 10 days (not WLS related) and she didn't even call once. She is overweight too, I considered that she was losing her "eating buddy", but over time I see it is more than that that. She has reached out to me again but there is an underlying hostility (anger?) that I just can't seem to ignore.

Surround yourself with positive energy and love.

[Hiraeth 515]

@@Hiraeth I have someone like that at work too. I also have this lady who I KNOW has had bariatric surgery. I can just "tell". But she won't talk about it or admit it. I used to knock her for not being honest and just saying it but now I realize why she doesn't.

It's like Jenn said, some people are against it out of legitimate concern, others for fear you may succeed.

good luck to you!

xoxo

Exactly! I mean, what normal person will say things like that to you just for the heck of it? I know the woman at my work wasn't worried about my safety, because she can be so spiteful and mean. She talks about me behind my back and has even called me names (not to my face, but I overheard her). So, the more I thought about it and discussed it with other people, I realized that she is just insecure and jealous. She doesn't want me to succeed because, if I do, then she will still be overweight and miserable.

Some funny things that happened: My mom kept telling me that my co-worker is jealous of me. At first, I didn't believe it because I couldn't understand why she would be. But my mom kept telling me to watch for signs and pay attention to how she acts. So I started paying more attention. I remember one day I came into work and told her I was going on a diet (this was last year when I tried dieting on my own). The next day, she announced that she was going on a diet, too. I was happy for her. She failed her diet in 3 days, because I noticed her munching on chips, Cookies, and cakes. I lost about 16 pounds, but stalled in my weight. I then regained the weight, because I'm a "yo-yo dieter". Another day, I walked in wearing Nautica sneakers that are black with white trim (they kinda look like Keds). She actually complimented my shoes and said they were cute. I was so excited that she thought that, because I'm so used to her being kinda bitter towards me. The next day, she was wearing sneakers that looked so much like mine. They were like the knock-off brand that you get at Walmart. I thought that was odd that she wore them right after complimenting mine. On another day, I wore my hair down. (I don't wear my hair down often because it's long and I hate dealing with it while at work, because I work around a lot of mail.) She kinda complimented my hair by saying, "Oh, I see you're wearing your hair down today." Within the next two days, she walked into work wearing a long-haired weave (she's African American). Again, I thought that was odd. On another day, I was just working at the mail machine, and I had my hair in a ponytail. She made another comment and said, "Her hair is so long. I wish I could wear my hair in a ponytail like that." She didn't even compliment me. She just says things in a third-person point of view as if I can't hear her, even though I'm literally 10 feet away from her. The next day, she wore her hair in a ponytail. I couldn't believe it, lol. When she found out that I was having this WLS, she was so mean and negative about it. It was like she wanted me to fail. But, while she was at her desk, I overheard her talking to her daughter on the phone about how they need to go to a weight loss clinic. I thought it was ridiculous how she was so negative about my WLS decision, yet she's going to a weight loss clinic to get stimulants and weight loss shots... And you know what else? She hasn't even complimented me on my VERY obvious weight loss. Everyone around me, even people who don't work in my department, say things like, "Wow, I don't know what you're doing to lose weight, but you look great!" Or "You're coming down!" Yet, my co-worker doesn't say anything about my weight loss. I've lost 60 pounds in 4 months. So, I asked her if she noticed I have lost weight. She said, "I can tell." Oh, ok then.

Edited December 14, 2016 by Hiraeth

[Carrie1122 139]

Wow- i had nothing but positivity at work. My work brother and Mom were on my ass to make sure I hit my fitbit 10,000 steps by the end of the day. I had to stay on target with weight before my surgery. I am so glad for their support because I didn't have it from everyone else!

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[Wonder WomanNJ 119]

@@Carrie1122 I know exactly what you mean. Just an example: My mother who is NOW supportive said "I hope you have the strength to make the life changes you need to make and not fail at this". Geeee thanks Ma! LOL I've been fat/chubby/heavy whatever you want to call it, all my life. Tried everything at least twice. This is not the EASY way by far.

We'll get there!

[Carrie1122 139]

@@Wonderwoman My mother in law is not supportive at all, she see's failure, which drives me to prove her wrong! People don't understand its an aide, its not a permanent fix. We all still have to workout, and eat healthy. This just gives us a reboot to start over. I miss my raw foods though, and I can barely eat. I wait all day to have a 1/3 cup of food with hubby at night. I made homemade Chinese last night it was so good and tons of healthiness. I am dying for pizza so I am going to make cauliflower pizza this weekend. I am so trying to stay away from bread I love it way too much! I love the fact that creative cooking can come out and I know making these changes will prove a healthier eating style and again prove wrong!

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[WGH3IWDT 93]

Also, don't focus on those people who are not supportive.

Focus on why you are doing this and who it is for, YOU.

SOME PEOPLE ARE NEGATIVE AND WILL NEVER CHANGE, YET AND STILL PRAY FOR THEM, AND FOCUS ON YOU

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