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Today all of the tears & anxiety hit me, with 23 days until my surgery. It was like you wrote this for me. We share a similar background, I lost my husband 5+ years ago because of the anesthesia wake up after surgery. Yep, it's all starting to freak me out. I've only told 5 people. I don't want anyone's anxieties from losing him to freak out and try to talk me out of it, I need this. None of my family knows. I think it's better for myself & then this way, especially my mil.

I keep taking deep breathes and concentrating on my goals. I have a wonderful & supportive BF who is my support.

Thanks for sharing.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

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When I was preparing to have my sleeve surgery, I spent a lot of time on this forum. I found most of the people here to be very helpful. Even though there's every kind of personality here, we all have one thing in common: we wanted to lose weight and be healthier.

Approaching any surgery is scary. There are real risks, and real rewards when all goes well.

I have struggled with weight my whole life. Total sugar junkie. Used food to replace every unmet need I had, to repress every emotion for which I was unprepared to deal.

I gained and lost hundreds of pounds over the course of my life. Hundreds.

When my husband died eight years ago it broke me. I shattered, and it took me almost a decade to put myself back together. During that time, I lost everything: my beloved, my home, my income, even my sense of self. And I spent the next eight years eating to fill this giant empty void inside my being where someone who I thought of as the love of my life used to be.

I ballooned up bigger than I had ever been, surpassing my previous high weight and moving into the 320s.

I avoided social situations, and only left the house when necessary. I was afraid I would have to ask for a stronger chair when invited to sit down for dinner at somebody's home. I was afraid that I would need to sit down every 20 or 30 steps during a leisurely stroll through the mall with a friend. My body ached; sometimes the pain was so bad that I could scarcely move-even sitting still was painful.

Life had become extremely small.

Deciding to get the surgery was surprisingly easy, but getting through the approval process and going through with the surgery summoned up terror in me that had been there since my first surgery when I was three years old.

I thought it would be a miracle if I were able to get the surgery, simply because my trauma was so severe for so many years that it seemed like an impossible feat to put myself in the hands of medical professionals, who I have never trusted all my life.

With lots of support from my mother, my sister who had already had the surgery, and my therapist, I was able to get the sleeve.

And it changed my life!

I also decided that I was going to make up for lost time now that I was going to be able to physically get around again. I sold all my stuff, ditched my apartment, bought an RV and moved in! And it's wonderful! I could not have fit in here, nor could I do the things necessary when living in an RV, at my previous weight.

This surgery has allowed me an opportunity for a whole new lease on life. I am officially one year postop, and I am down about 130 pounds, with another 30 to go. It's amazing the difference a single year can make!

If you know that this is right for you, and the only thing giving you pause is fear that is not coming from your true intuition: there are many people on these forums who feel that this surgery has saved our lives.

I am one of those people. Here is a before and present a photo of me, in a year, this could be you!attachicon.gif ImageUploadedByBariatricPal1480776848.497729.jpg

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

@@JupiterinVirgo you have no idea how much I needed to hear your words. I too have struggled with trust issues in med field along with self doubt and fear of complications. As I get closer to my surgery date (12/21/16) my addiction is trying everything to win. I know this isn't a cure all, and I know there is lots of work to be done, but fear has held me back for so long, that I have listened as if it is a trusted friend!

Your words were exactly what I needed to hear to tell fear, once and for all, to take a hike! I will not let fear rule my life any longer!

This is a Weightloss adventure, but the journey is in finding out what we are made of, what we have been missing, and what we are meant to be!

Thank you again!!!!!

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

I am so honored, if in some small way my story gives you strength or courage. I know it's really close now-really just stays away for you. The doorway to a new life!

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

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Today all of the tears & anxiety hit me, with 23 days until my surgery. It was like you wrote this for me. We share a similar background, I lost my husband 5+ years ago because of the anesthesia wake up after surgery. Yep, it's all starting to freak me out. I've only told 5 people. I don't want anyone's anxieties from losing him to freak out and try to talk me out of it, I need this. None of my family knows. I think it's better for myself & then this way, especially my mil.

I keep taking deep breathes and concentrating on my goals. I have a wonderful & supportive BF who is my support.

Thanks for sharing.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Your strength and courage makes you a kind of pioneer! As a culture, we outsource everything. Including the most important initiatory experiences of our lives: birth and death. Both of these things change everything, and people become very afraid. But you are showing them, leading by example! Congratulations! Vanquishing of fear is expansion of aliveness!

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

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What an amazing story , You really spire me !! Congratulation and many blessings to come !!


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Thank you for your story, it's very inspiring! You look amazing!!!

Sent from my SM-G930VL using BariatricPal mobile app

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I want to earnestly thank everyone of you from the bottom of my heart for being so receptive, and so kind in your responses. I read them all. And I am so grateful if in some small way my story helps you to claim the life you truly deserve. Aliveness has become my primary value. I am pursuing it with all my primal might. LOL
Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App


I absolutely love this. “Pursuing aliveness with all of our primal might.” Fantastic- I am going to borrow this if you don’t mind. I am 1 week postop, and was very afraid to get this surgery. So far I am shocked to feel like the same me. All is well. Thank you so much for such wonderful inspiration today!


Surgery Date: January 8, 2018
Sleeve Gastrectomy

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When I was preparing to have my sleeve surgery, I spent a lot of time on this forum. I found most of the people here to be very helpful. Even though there's every kind of personality here, we all have one thing in common: we wanted to lose weight and be healthier.
Approaching any surgery is scary. There are real risks, and real rewards when all goes well.
I have struggled with weight my whole life. Total sugar junkie. Used food to replace every unmet need I had, to repress every emotion for which I was unprepared to deal.
I gained and lost hundreds of pounds over the course of my life. Hundreds.
When my husband died eight years ago it broke me. I shattered, and it took me almost a decade to put myself back together. During that time, I lost everything: my beloved, my home, my income, even my sense of self. And I spent the next eight years eating to fill this giant empty void inside my being where someone who I thought of as the love of my life used to be.
I ballooned up bigger than I had ever been, surpassing my previous high weight and moving into the 320s.
I avoided social situations, and only left the house when necessary. I was afraid I would have to ask for a stronger chair when invited to sit down for dinner at somebody's home. I was afraid that I would need to sit down every 20 or 30 steps during a leisurely stroll through the mall with a friend. My body ached; sometimes the pain was so bad that I could scarcely move-even sitting still was painful.
Life had become extremely small.
Deciding to get the surgery was surprisingly easy, but getting through the approval process and going through with the surgery summoned up terror in me that had been there since my first surgery when I was three years old.
I thought it would be a miracle if I were able to get the surgery, simply because my trauma was so severe for so many years that it seemed like an impossible feat to put myself in the hands of medical professionals, who I have never trusted all my life.
With lots of support from my mother, my sister who had already had the surgery, and my therapist, I was able to get the sleeve.
And it changed my life!
I also decided that I was going to make up for lost time now that I was going to be able to physically get around again. I sold all my stuff, ditched my apartment, bought an RV and moved in! And it's wonderful! I could not have fit in here, nor could I do the things necessary when living in an RV, at my previous weight.
This surgery has allowed me an opportunity for a whole new lease on life. I am officially one year postop, and I am down about 130 pounds, with another 30 to go. It's amazing the difference a single year can make!
If you know that this is right for you, and the only thing giving you pause is fear that is not coming from your true intuition: there are many people on these forums who feel that this surgery has saved our lives.
I am one of those people. Here is a before and present a photo of me, in a year, this could be you!post-260601-14807768576727_thumb.jpg
Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

That is amazing!!! Thank you for sharing your story. I’m so nervous about the surgery, staying in the hospital and post-op. Glad to know it’s worth it!!


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