ascott0322 2 Posted November 26, 2016 Coming from someone that has always yo-yod with weight, I definitely feel you. As soon as I gain weight, one of my ugly a$$ family members or friends want to point out the obvious. I'm the clapback queen and have no problem with pointing out the flaws of anyone that thinks it's OK to mention the big girl. People can be rude... and you handled it very well. When you drop the pounds, they'll talk about that. There's no changing rude folks Sent from my SM-G930T using the BariatricPal App Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The New Kel 1,312 Posted November 26, 2016 @@Raymia , Just wait till next year, and how they will be eating their words. People can be soooo rude! The day I met my mother-in-law for the first time while simultaneously hugging me said, "You sure aren't a frail twig like Lisa (his ex) was." I was like...uh, thanks. Even though my journey is just beginning, I now feel better in social situations, knowing that my body is transforming and I will never be as big as they see me now. Its nice knowing, even though they don't realize it, yet. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shellyd88 463 Posted November 27, 2016 Some people will just find things to criticize others about regardless it's just their personality they must diminish others in some way to feel superior do not allow it smile and change the subject and do not respond in any way to to the nasty comments do not allow any acknowledgement to this type of behavior do not let others make you feel you aren't good enough whatever your size etc no one is perfect Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Raymia 565 Posted November 27, 2016 Thank you!!! By "big" girls they must have meant:BeautifulIntelligentGifted Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Raymia 565 Posted November 27, 2016 If it were my family I would... But it was my first time meeting some of his family on a holiday. I didn't want to ruin things so I let it go... People need to realize we can lose weight, but they're stuck with their flaws! Coming from someone that has always yo-yod with weight, I definitely feel you. As soon as I gain weight, one of my ugly a$$ family members or friends want to point out the obvious. I'm the clapback queen and have no problem with pointing out the flaws of anyone that thinks it's OK to mention the big girl. People can be rude... and you handled it very well. When you drop the pounds, they'll talk about that. There's no changing rude folksSent from my SM-G930T using the BariatricPal App Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Raymia 565 Posted November 27, 2016 Thank you that's all I kept saying to myself @@Raymia , Just wait till next year, and how they will be eating their words. People can be soooo rude! The day I met my mother-in-law for the first time while simultaneously hugging me said, "You sure aren't a frail twig like Lisa (his ex) was." I was like...uh, thanks. Even though my journey is just beginning, I now feel better in social situations, knowing that my body is transforming and I will never be as big as they see me now. Its nice knowing, even though they don't realize it, yet. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ascott0322 2 Posted November 27, 2016 If it were my family I would... But it was my first time meeting some of his family on a holiday. I didn't want to ruin things so I let it go... People need to realize we can lose weight, but they're stuck with their flaws! Coming from someone that has always yo-yod with weight, I definitely feel you. As soon as I gain weight, one of my ugly a$$ family members or friends want to point out the obvious. I'm the clapback queen and have no problem with pointing out the flaws of anyone that thinks it's OK to mention the big girl. People can be rude... and you handled it very well. When you drop the pounds, they'll talk about that. There's no changing rude folks Sent from my SM-G930T using the BariatricPal App Oh I completely understand... you handled it very well. Sent from my SM-G930T using the BariatricPal App Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
4MRB4PHOTO 3,900 Posted November 27, 2016 You kept your class with your MIL, even after that remark by her. You could also have said with a smile and a soft, tranquil voice: "Yes, I am not like Lisa, I am here for your son right now and love him very much". Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AvaFern 3,516 Posted November 27, 2016 I'm sorry those people were rude to you. I think most of us have had a comment like that at some point. If it makes you laugh a little, when I was walking around the hospital after my sleeve surgery one of the staff (I think she may have been an orderly) says to me...oh well honey, you have such a pretty face...now the rest of you will match. Lol, at the time I was like, well gee, thanks, but now I can look back on it and realize she wasn't trying to be hurtful. Ha..and now I do have a rest of me that matches a pretty face, so in the end it all worked out well for me. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Armygalbonnie 643 Posted November 28, 2016 My dad is the worst! He always comments on people's weight. "The sweet girl at McDonalds who fixes my coffee every day is such a hard worker, but she sure is a big girl." "All your brother ever does is think about eating. I think it's an obsession. He really needs to lose about 100 lbs." No telling what he says about me!!!! That's why I didn't even tell him that I was having surgery. I've heard about my weight issues my entire life from him, and I'm in my 50's. He's very prejudice about overweight people. However, I do remember when he had a huge belly and looked 9 months pregnant. Of course he never saw himself that way. My all time least favorite, backhanded compliment: "She has such a pretty face." Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Raymia 565 Posted November 28, 2016 Gosh he sounds like my father @@Armygalbonnie I haven't told my dad yet either. But my sister spilled the Beans and told my mom so its only a matter of time. Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G928A using the BariatricPal App Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kc13 31 Posted November 28, 2016 I had a substitute PE teacher in highschool that told me "you're pretty but you could stand to lose a few pounds" after I just helped this old man take attendance and go over what we do daily. I'm obese but I've alway been physically able to do everything a smaller person can. I can run a mile without stopping and I'm extremely flexible. It's just so rude lol Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
y0lis 33 Posted November 29, 2016 Soooo yesterday I met a few of my Fiancée family for the first time. Okay cool but of course the first thing said is..... Marvin Love's those Big Girls (No he only loves me.... He's ex was petite rolls eyes)! Followed by she's Beautiful tho.... What type of **** is that! I'm telling you I'm so tired of hearing this and if I had a dollar for every time a person says this to me I would be rich! Anyway as usual I didn't reply to the ignorant statement but in my head I just wondered what will people say about me once the weight is gone? It's seems to me that weight is the ultimate issue with ppl, and there were so many ppl around I wonder did everyone get a grand announcement when they arrived? Such as ( Oh look here uncle John with his new wife she's missing all her teeth or wow Carla boyfriends here I noticed he still has bad acme...) but no they only see the Big Girl, I can never go unnoticed when I enter the room. 5'5 280 and high heels....... Of course I make heads turn! Just wait I hope things play and I get my January surgery date I am so sorry for your experience I too have dealt with this sort of nonsense. I dated a guy for 2 years I finally called it quits his family are all petite they make fun of and discriminate so much against people who are over weight. It's always you know the fat girl the big girl etc I could just imagine what they say about me when I am not around. He recently said you are the biggest girl I have ever dated but once I got to know you I got passed you being fat. He was so against me having surgery even threaten to break up with me. Little did he know it was just a matter of time before I beat him to the punch. I am good and look forward to a stress free life without him. I know exactly where to run into them and Lord willing in a few months I will walk in to see thier jaws drop! I am not doing this for this sole purpose I have been dealing with alot of health issues in the last year. I have rheumatoid arthritis and being overweight does not help! Best of luck to you! Sent from my SM-N920P using the BariatricPal App Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Raymia 565 Posted November 29, 2016 Soooo yesterday I met a few of my Fiancée family for the first time. Okay cool but of course the first thing said is..... Marvin Love's those Big Girls (No he only loves me.... He's ex was petite rolls eyes)! Followed by she's Beautiful tho.... What type of **** is that! I'm telling you I'm so tired of hearing this and if I had a dollar for every time a person says this to me I would be rich! Anyway as usual I didn't reply to the ignorant statement but in my head I just wondered what will people say about me once the weight is gone? It's seems to me that weight is the ultimate issue with ppl, and there were so many ppl around I wonder did everyone get a grand announcement when they arrived? Such as ( Oh look here uncle John with his new wife she's missing all her teeth or wow Carla boyfriends here I noticed he still has bad acme...) but no they only see the Big Girl, I can never go unnoticed when I enter the room. 5'5 280 and high heels....... Of course I make heads turn! Just wait I hope things play and I get my January surgery date I am so sorry for your experience I too have dealt with this sort of nonsense. I dated a guy for 2 years I finally called it quits his family are all petite they make fun of and discriminate so much against people who are over weight. It's always you know the fat girl the big girl etc I could just imagine what they say about me when I am not around. He recently said you are the biggest girl I have ever dated but once I got to know you I got passed you being fat. He was so against me having surgery even threaten to break up with me. Little did he know it was just a matter of time before I beat him to the punch. I am good and look forward to a stress free life without him. I know exactly where to run into them and Lord willing in a few months I will walk in to see thier jaws drop! I am not doing this for this sole purpose I have been dealing with alot of health issues in the last year. I have rheumatoid arthritis and being overweight does not help! Best of luck to you! Sent from my SM-N920P using the BariatricPal App Yes!!!! I completely relate to you... The only difference is my fiancé family well on this side are not skinny they are all shapes and sizes! But they will see me again and I promise you I'm gonna flaunt my @$$ off to! Anyways I hope you feel some relief after the surgery, mother moved around a lot better after her Gastric Bypass of course losing weight didn't take the Arthritis away but she does feel much better. I wish you the BEST!!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites