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Scared and confused



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So I just started the process, I have my first appointment/ Nutrition group on Monday and up until 2 days ago I have been very excited and fully committed. This is something different for me because I have commitment issues and I am always thinking about the what ifs and always scared to make the wrong decision, can I live with that decision for the rest of my life? but with the surgery I was 100% committed and knew it was what I wanted to do for myself, my wife, and future offsprings.

2 days ago I read a post about a woman who completely regrets her decision to get the wls and her struggles with most of the aspects around it. While I was reading the story, I thought to myself that her regrets were because of her many complications, some possibly caused by previous health issues and that it did not mean that I would have the same outcome. Aside from being extra fluffy and a recent diagnosis of high blood pressure I am actually pretty healthy. I read the story, everyone's reactions and put it aside, however, for some reason I keep thinking about that it and this woman's issues and regrets.

I am constantly thinking about what are all the possible issues that could arise from this surgery? Could I handle them for the rest of my life. Is it worth it? Am I going to want to be on Vitamins the rest of my life?

That same day, my dream of joining the military after weight loss was also crushed because the military disqualifies wls patients.

In addition, there are possibilities of insurance issues in the future. How will this affect me?

What else will be affected from my life because of this? It's funny because I am thinking, what else will I miss because of this surgery? let's be honest I am probably missing a million more things because of my weight.

Could my weight be a cause of sleep apnea?(i am working on getting a study now) if I do and use a cpap, will I all of a sudden get enough energy and be able to loose the weight?

Do I have hypothyroidism? I have had blood work done and my level shows that I am fine but everyone on my mothers side including my sister have had the same result. Eventually, they get someone to agree to complete an MRI of the thyroid and sure enough, they are diagnosed with hypothyroidism. Could this be the result of my excessive weight? If I get someone to agree to the MRI and the result is positive will I stop being fluffy after treatment ?

These forums are filled with people that are ecstatic with their decision to get wls but not very many of people past the 2 year mark. Obviously everyone is happy at first and has that honeymoon phase (After the immediate regret phase of course) so they share and maintain in contact with the people that helped them through it for a little bit. What happens after 2 years? Does everyone just move on with life and not have time because their new found freedom? Do they decrease communications to separate themselves from being something other than a wls patient? Do they not post because of regrets? Are they still happy? How do they feel about the constant maintenance? It will always be difficult but does it get easier? Does it become routine? Why isn't there much information and experiences about the long term?

Welcome to the inside of my brain. #chaos

What dreams have come true or been crushed because of wls?

What have you done that you would have never in a million years thought you'd be able to do? (Ex. Become a police officer)

I have so many more questions I can't even think of them right now. I may post more as they come in.

Thanks for reading, it felt good to let someone know.

Edited by rico31286

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The percentage of wls patients with complications is very small compared to successes.

Just do your research. Pick a good doctor, if possible chose a center of excellence hospital.

As far as insurance after wls. My brother sells life insurance and he told me no insurance company would touch me while in the process, but once I'm finished it would be fine. Come on, we are living a healthy lifestyle.

I didn't know that about the military. Maybe it depends on which process. To me the sleeve left me with no complications and a year of follows up with my doctor and up to 12 visits with my nutritionist. As far as Vitamins, I use the PatchMD. Easy peasy. My labs came back fine. I put one on each night. I've never felt better.

It's ultimately up to you in how you succeed in keeping the weight off. There are enough veterans on here years out still successful.

More often than not, those at goal all say they wish they did it earlier.

Sent from my SM-N910T using the BariatricPal App

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I belong to a Facebook group for the company that I had my surgery with.

As an example of the kinds of posts people make about WLS, one woman wrote about her experience with her IV.

She said it was so painful when they inserted the (tiny) needle that she screamed. She swore and burst into flames at the nurses, basically. She told them she couldn't stand the pain when they had to reinsert the IV.

The nurse gave her a few mins, then returned. She refused, because it was just the. Let excruciating pain in the world. The doctor came in and told her they were not going to operate if she couldn't tolerate a simple IV. SHe was so offended that she trashed this doctor to the group, because no one had ever been so rude to her in her whole life.

She bravely suffered through the IV, but when it was removed after surgery it left a small bruise on her arm. It was the most painful thing she has ever endured.

This is just 1 example of many of the things people say/write. Take everything with a grain of salt. I struggled to feel empathy for this person, because she clearly has a flair for melodrama, and I thought it was super crappy of her to mistreat the hospital staff over a simple, routine and medically necessary part of being admitted.

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I do think that many times those who post have more challenges than those who don't. I am only two days out of surgery which seems to be the time people feel the most challenges and thus far things are fine...sore, sure. Nausea ... after surgery. Hungry? I am .... but not out of control. Just getting ready to embrace this new life. Conversely, thus is the third time I started the process ..... I just wasn't ready before. Listen to all experiences with a grain of salt and make the best choices for you and your life. Trust yourself as opposed to all of us....

Sent from my SM-G935V using the BariatricPal App

Edited by Pam924

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Everyone has a different experience. Preparation for the surgery is key--practice everything the doctor, dietitians and psychologist tells you (if all that is part of your program). Go to support group - again if your program has that feature. I learned so much before surgery with these suggestions. And..I met many people who were years out of the surgery, and still "normal" weight--in the support group. They had tips and tricks I never would have thought of to help with a successful outcome. With all that preparation under my belt, I was so, so ready for the surgery. I had the usual post-op aches and pains, but nothing was terrible. All I could think of was "finally, I'm going to be able to control my weight!"

I stuck to the program to the letter. I kept every appointment. Vitamins are not that big a deal (I take one a day--and take Calcium separately). I am on a CPAP, and recently had a follow up sleep study. I still need the CPAP (it wasn't necessarily my weight! Sometimes it's just the way we are built). And that's okay--and I'm only 9 lbs to my goal after 13 months in the program, 7 months post op. I LOVE IT!!! I've lost almost 120 lbs, and I still am amazed.

There has not been one second of one day that I have regretted this decision. Every day brings a new wonderful surprise, and I can't believe it's me in the mirror. Even the plateaus aren't too bad...I just keep on keeping on. I wish I'd done this years ago, but I'm so glad I did it now. I feel sooo good!

My husband thinks I look awesome. Our relationship was always good, but now it's better because I feel better about myself.

Just prepare, prepare, prepare. Learn everything you can about the procedure. A decision is a lot easier when you know what you're deciding. It was the best thing I ever did, and I hope it will be that way for you.

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