Vet advice on permanent changes

[2ndSpring 350]

I’m 1 month out and have been on mushy food since early on (as per doc’s instructions). I’ve been following all of my instructions: eating only allowed foods, taking Vitamins, getting Protein, going for walks and hydrating. I’ve been logging and tracking everything.

I want to use this period wisely. I want to change habits and create new automatic responses. I figure practice makes perfect when it comes to saying no. My concern is that I feel like I’m still obsessed with food but it is masquerading as positive behavior. All the planning, tracking and logging means I’m still thinking about food constantly. And I eat a snack at night even when I’m not hungry if my Protein count is too low for the day. Are these seemingly good behaviors reinforcing the old ways?

I’d be really interested to hear from the vets about anything that helped them make permanent changes and also what didn’t help.

Thanks!

[Bufflehead 6,358]

Look at it this way: Say you knew someone who had severe financial problems, ended up getting evicted from their apartment, their car repossessed, bouncing checks all over the place, overspending on credit limits, and eventually filing bankruptcy. They couldn't afford to support their pets so gave them away to the county shelter. You get the idea -- bad situation, severe financial distress.

They work extremely hard after their bankruptcy. They get a new job. They are diligent about making sure they have enough money in their bank account, they decline to spend on credit cards, they check their credit score regularly. What would you tell them:

(1) Wow, you are too obsessed with money. You should have a more normal relationship with money. Stop looking at your bank account balance and just go with your natural instincts! Spend what you want and stop being so negative about money.

or

(2) Good job keeping on top of your financial situation, I know it's caused you problems in the past. If you keep up with these great habits, you'll never file bankruptcy or get evicted again.

Sometimes when things give us problems in life, we have to commit to doing hardcore, serious work to fix those problems. Don't let anyone tell you that the work you do to fix a problem means that you are "obsessive" or engaging in "negative behavior." Don't even let your (fat) brain that wants you to stay fat try to tell you that.

Good luck!

PS: I am calling it your fat brain not because I am picking on you or trying to be insulting. I think we all -- primarily ME -- have a lizard brain that instinctively wants us to stay fat or to gain weight if we aren't fat anymore. My fat brain tells me things like "this one piece of cake won't hurt anything" and "you deserve Starbucks after a long week at work." I notice other people on here with fat brains telling them things like "you need to eat more calories in order to lose weight" or "ice cream has lots of protein" or "I can't eat that much mashed potato anyway, I should eat as much as I want on the puree phase." All of us have fat brains that try to trick us and lie to us.

Edited November 4, 2016 by Bufflehead

[theantichick 2,204]

I'm not a vet yet, but I can't express how much working with a therapist about food issues has helped me re-configure how I think about food. I was (am?) an emotional eater, and verging on binge eating behavior. As well as a PTSD type of situation around vegetables. I started seeing a therapist before I even decided whether or not to have the surgery because I knew I needed to address those with or without the surgery.

I will probably keep working with her through the first year at the least. I don't want to blow this opportunity. It can be hard to find the right fit with a therapist, but I think it's absolutely worth it.

[2ndSpring 350]

thanks for the replies.

Bufflehead: That was a great analogy! You are absolutely right and I'm thinking of this the wrong way. I just really want to make sure I'm putting this time to good use. I totally understood the "fat brain". I agree with you that our reptilian brains want us to stay fat. Haha, we would have been great cavepeople...sole survivors after a long winter famine.

Antichick: thanks for the advice, maybe I'll make an appointment with the psychologist at my surgeon's office.

[sgc 538]

I have a set meal for each day of the week. Today is chicken night. Yesterday was fish. Breakfast and lunch are the same each day. It's a rigid schedule but I don't have to make choices. I already made the choices.

Edited November 5, 2016 by sgc