Staying positive. I am NOT happy

[Spectra13 25]

I am 4 weeks out (sleeved 9/19) and struggle mentally on this daily. It's not easy and I keep saying I regret even doing it. I don't want to eat 4oz meals forever.

What's messed up is, people who go through this should be made to see a psychologist who specializes in food disorders for 6 months instead of one visit to say she is sane enough to have the surgery. Because if you get your mentality under control you may not even need the surgery. You may be able to do it yourself. Unfortunately, I didn't realize that until now. Yeah all the failed diets, "I can't do it by myself cos I've tried 10 times and failed" blah blah. It's bull. There is a mental reason we haven't been able to do it. (Unless you have medical reasons of course). We are addicted to food. And I think about food now WAY MORE then I did before the surgery. Because I have to and it's torture and I hate it.

It's a hassle to go anywhere. I have no energy. I feel like I'm dying and I dream about pizza. Everyone here seems so positive and upbeat. "Think about why you wanted to do it in the first place...." it's not the answer for me. "Go talk to someone"....It's not the answer for me. I don't know what I can do, but I know it's done and I can't turn back the clock. I know I am forced to live like this now. All I can do is pray. But most of the time I just curse myself for doing this at all.

Has no one here felt like that!!??? I feel so alone in these thoughts here.

HW 276. SW 245. CW 230

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[kathy Garibay 11]

I've just had my first visit to the surgeon, and I know my eating is out of control and that's why I have 6 months to work on my eating habits. ..I know it's going to be hard ...I feel ya on this I'll be praying for you

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[GinaCampbell 434]

You are not alone. I posted exactly the same.

I am nearly five months out now. I have not altered in my opinion.

I won't patronise you by saying all the usual things people say in response to being unhappy this early on.

But I will say this. You will become more healthy i.e. you will heal, learn a way to eat, recover from surgery.

I know that it seems grim right now, trust me, I know.

You are right, it's done now. And you are right, you have to think about food more, plan how you eat more etc. You will think about junk food and old food habits.

Believe me when I say, the thought of those foods are better than how they will taste now.

You will probably not have the energy you need for awhile. Recovering from surgery takes time.

It is okay to feel unhappy. People here will tell you about "buyer's remorse" and the hormones that are raging through your system as the weight drops off initially.

This is all normal.

Praying is good. Mourning the loss of what was normal is understandable.

I literally decided to concentrate on healing. I put out of my head that I made the wrong decision, that I had to live this way etc. and just spent everyday trying to get well.

Water, rest, Protein and walking. That was my priority.

Praying for peace, staying calm and talking to your team will help.

Hang in there!

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[tenseintexas 182]

I am not happy with my surgery currently either . I am 8 1/2 weeks out and I can't eat too much. But food absolutely grosses me out and every time I eat I feel uncomfortable. Two bites and I am def done . I don't want to eat at all and worry about health from not eating but 400 calories a day. I don't have any energy either and am scared it's never going to come back. But so many people here say it gets better- so I am def trying to focus on that and believe that it WILL get better. I don't necessarily crave eating but I crave my stomach feeling normal when I eat ... Well anything. Good luck to you

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[allies journey 144]

My goodness, you are really struggling. I am so sorry. .I am having my sleeve surgery in 13 days. I feel like it's my only hope.

Although weight loss is a super big bonus for me it's about getting my health on track and off over Half the meds I am taking.

Are you doing your Protein Drinks? ?That should give you energy. MAYBE you should talk to the nutritionist. .

Have you lost some weight? ?

Maybe you should see your Dr.too if you're not on antidepressant maybe you should consider it for a while.

Gosh , I hope things get better for you.

Good luck and just keep your chin up.

Set small goals and focus on the end result not so much on what foods your currently missing.

I know easier said than done and I have not experienced it yet but this is a lifestyle change not a quick fix .

Again best of luck. .

Allie

[sc101071 398]

Prayer is not all that you can do. Talk to someone. I know it's not an answer for you but it might be the best you've got post surgery.

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[KristenLe 5,979]

@@Spectra13 It's not too late to have therapy to deal with your food addiction. You will be able to eat more than 4ozs. This is more mental than physical and I wish they required therapy before surgery. Also be aware that your hormones are all out of whack right now and things look worse than they are. It's very unlikely you would have been able to lose on your own and keep the weight off. You've lost 15 lbs in 3 weeks. That would not be possible for me without surgery. It would take me months and I would get do frustrated that I'd give up. Also - I'd have to starve myself to get there and that's not sustainable. Hang in there!

[Dairymary 533]

So for those of you regretting surgery and struggling, are you seeing a therapist.? In my experience, this is critical to success and yes, should be mandatory before and after any WLS. It's done wonders for all aspects of my life. just Like the OP said, we suffer from a psychological addiction that surgery did not address in any way shape or form.

[Seevan 32]

No your not the only one who has these feelings. This process is challenging. I feel I need to see psychologist. But not right now. We all have our thoughts. I think about pizza, subs etc. But this why I had the surgery. Not being able to control my eating portions. We should be eating like this anyway. I was sleeved on 9.7.16. I'm having my moments. I'm 30 lbs down. I feel much better. I'm gonna hang in there. I pray your strength. I gets better. I have friends that have made it through this with good results.

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[Pescador 1,374]

Seriously try and get some professional help. In addition to hormonal changes in your body, surgery, and the thoughts you have, I think depression itself is a big part of being overweight. Not to mention the daily stresses we have.

That being said, I don't want to deter anyone from changing their life with the sleeve. My husband and I were 67 when sleeved, and instead of being absolutely chained to the sofa, we are up, out, boating, kayaking, and traveling. He has lost 100 lbs and I gladly walked him straight into the sleeve after fifteen years of WL seminars, horrible cellulitis, toe amputations from diabetes (5 months of daily IV antibiotics to save a big toe), HBP with the highest number of medicines, rescue calls in the middle of the night when his blood sugar bottomed at 40 because he went ALL day not eating because of his weight. If we had the sleeve available fifteen years ago it might have stopped some of the serious health problems. It has changed our life forever and I hope you will look at the health benefits and why you went into this surgery. Good luck everyone. I know this is a hard journey but find help, and find the positives.

[GinaCampbell 434]

So for those of you regretting surgery and struggling, are you seeing a therapist.? In my experience, this is critical to success and yes, should be mandatory before and after any WLS. It's done wonders for all aspects of my life. just Like the OP said, we suffer from a psychological addiction that surgery did not address in any way shape or form.

I did have a therapist throughout but not through my bariatric team and not in connection with being overweight.

I don't have a food "addiction".

I gained weight during a long term illness that left me bed bound and taking medication that causes weight gain.

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[Ebony Rose 133]

Oh love, I hear what your saying.

Try to stay in the moment. Mindfulness is a great tool, it will help you relax and help not look forward or backwards. Just being here right now in this moment then the next etc. Sitting with these feelings and acknowledging them is great!

Your mind and body are tired right now but over time things will get better.

Hope today is better for you xx

[cbonet 336]

I'm certainly not going to tell you how you should feel. I would like to offer you some support. Maybe it would help if you concentrate on why you chose the surgery to begin with and what your life goals where when you made the decision. I had mine a week before you, so I'm at one month. It is hard, I am tired and I miss food.< /p>

I don't regret it because I know why I did it and what I want. I do wish you well and hope time and healing brings you success and comfort.

[Dairymary 533]

So for those of you regretting surgery and struggling, are you seeing a therapist.? In my experience, this is critical to success and yes, should be mandatory before and after any WLS. It's done wonders for all aspects of my life. just Like the OP said, we suffer from a psychological addiction that surgery did not address in any way shape or form.

I did have a therapist throughout but not through my bariatric team and not in connection with being overweight.

I don't have a food "addiction".

I gained weight during a long term illness that left me bed bound and taking medication that causes weight gain.

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I'm very sorry for your illness and what you have gone through. We all have our own stories of how we became obese. But bottom line, we all got that way because we ate more calories than our bodies needed. Yes, medications, certain illnesses and restricted activity can contribute, but we consciously made the choices of the kind of food and amount of food we ate. We couldn't help ourselves despite the fact our behavior lead to unwanted results. This is the definition of addiction.

I hope you are getting better and I truly hope you find peace with your decision to have WLS.

[GinaCampbell 434]

So for those of you regretting surgery and struggling, are you seeing a therapist.? In my experience, this is critical to success and yes, should be mandatory before and after any WLS. It's done wonders for all aspects of my life. just Like the OP said, we suffer from a psychological addiction that surgery did not address in any way shape or form.

I did have a therapist throughout but not through my bariatric team and not in connection with being overweight.

I don't have a food "addiction".

I gained weight during a long term illness that left me bed bound and taking medication that causes weight gain.

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I'm very sorry for your illness and what you have gone through. We all have our own stories of how we became obese. But bottom line, we all got that way because we ate more calories than our bodies needed. Yes, medications, certain illnesses and restricted activity can contribute, but we consciously made the choices of the kind of food and amount of food we ate. We couldn't help ourselves despite the fact our behavior lead to unwanted results. This is the definition of addiction.

I hope you are getting better and I truly hope you find peace with your decision to have WLS.

My becoming disabled suddenly is certainly not common. Being bed bound, alone and unable to cook meant that I was making the only choices that I could. That's not to say that I don't own any responsibility in any part that I may have played in becoming obese.

That is why I approached my GP, spent years in the bariatric system, then had surgery based on the advice I received from that team.

I was told that "I could not exercise and would only get heavier" if I did not have this done.

And of course, who doesn't want to lose the excess weight?

I am better and I am at peace. I have lost all of the excess weight now and am on maintenance but still losing weight. I still have clostridium difficile also.

Just trying to reassure the OP that they will recover from surgery eventually and that they will find a new "normal", even if this surgery doesn't feel like it was the right thing to do.

The OP asked if anyone else felt the way they do. It can feel very isolating when everyone else is thrilled with their sleeve and you hate yours.

When I was at my most ill, hospitalised and suffering from all manner of problems (malnutrition, infections etc), most everyone always said the same thing. I know you are deathly ill right now but look how much weight you've lost.

People love to talk about it. They want to be excited with you. But sometimes you just feel rotten because you can't simply grab a cup of tea, or a sandwich on the go anymore.

No matter what got you here though, there is little point in dwelling on what you can't change.

Having acceptance is crucial here. I really feel for everyone who feels low because they think they made a mistake in having WLS.

Just hang in there! You can get better, feel better. I have been through purgatory since May and am still quite ill but my body is healing gradually. I had my first B12 injection recently. I am getting back to being myself a bit more everyday.

It won't always be so bad.

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