First Consult! Husband jumping the supportive ship...

[Smdnght28 69]

So my first consult with the surgeon was this past friday . I am so excited for whats to come. While we did discuss the different types and the benefits of each surgery; I feel as though he was trying to push me to have RNY instead of VSG. But he said as long as I don't have severe reflux getting the sleeve should be okay.

I was discussing the surgery with my husband again and he has some concerns with getting a part of my stomach removed. He was very supportive in the beginning but now he doesn't want me to do it, he says its too much of a risk

[Fredbear 397]

And your husband is a licensed medical doctor or surgeon, right?

"When all is said and done, usually more has been said than done. "

[mrswifey2008 11]

I am in the very same boat. I had asked the surgeon I want to use at the consult how many surgeries he's done and how many had complications that lead to death. My husband focused on that information only and now is convinced that I am going to die if I have this surgery (the number of surgeries was a little over 1500 and he's had two deaths....one was from issues that the person had prior to surgery and the other they don't know what happened... the surgery was perfect and she passed away her sleep the next night). My husband literally is my only person I have I can lean on for support. I NEED this surgery for my health. He doesn't seem to realize that if I don't have it my path will remain the same. ????

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[Simply Sleeved 1]

My honey wasn't supportive of me having the surgery and since I have came out of surgery on 9/27 I have received approximately 3 text msgs,.one of which was to say "I told you so" in regards to the pain. This surgery changes people...

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[Smdnght28 69]

I am in the very same boat. I had asked the surgeon I want to use at the consult how many surgeries he's done and how many had complications that lead to death. My husband focused on that information only and now is convinced that I am going to die if I have this surgery (the number of surgeries was a little over 1500 and he's had two deaths....one was from issues that the person had prior to surgery and the other they don't know what happened... the surgery was perfect and she passed away her sleep the next night). My husband literally is my only person I have I can lean on for support. I NEED this surgery for my health. He doesn't seem to realize that if I don't have it my path will remain the same.

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I asked the same question to my surgeon as well. He's performed over 3000 with 6 deaths; three from heart attacks. I want my husband to come to one of the support groups with me and see if that would help ease some of his fears i guess. He wants me to wait a year, but i just cant each time i go back to the doctors i get scared that something else might be wrong with my health. I'm really to take charge of my life, he's just gotta fall in line lol

[genn 460]

I'm so lucky my husband is by my side % he supports me for the RNY even tho he thought I shld go a different route told me it's my choice in the end. I find out my surgery date soon and he is even taking a week off to be with me. I hope everything gets better for all u all it makes me realize how lucky I am even when my husband is grouchy and drives me crazy. Remember this is about you now and ur health I always put everyone before me and I realized if I wanted to put them first in the future I had to put me first so I could be around. Good luck to all!!!

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[mrswifey2008 11]

Right! I've never been one to rock the boat... but I'm 35 now and have progressively been getting worse since my early 20's. I'm fed up. ????

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[genn 460]

I am in the very same boat. I had asked the surgeon I want to use at the consult how many surgeries he's done and how many had complications that lead to death. My husband focused on that information only and now is convinced that I am going to die if I have this surgery (the number of surgeries was a little over 1500 and he's had two deaths....one was from issues that the person had prior to surgery and the other they don't know what happened... the surgery was perfect and she passed away her sleep the next night). My husband literally is my only person I have I can lean on for support. I NEED this surgery for my health. He doesn't seem to realize that if I don't have it my path will remain the same.

Sent from my SM-G920V using the BariatricPal App

I asked the same question to my surgeon as well. He's performed over 3000 with 6 deaths; three from heart attacks. I want my husband to come to one of the support groups with me and see if that would help ease some of his fears i guess. He wants me to wait a year, but i just cant each time i go back to the doctors i get scared that something else might be wrong with my health. I'm really to take charge of my life, he's just gotta fall in line lol

My husband even went to a support group with me and asked all kinds of questions. But will not change his habits with me but supports me otherwise!! There are lots of horror stories. That's why they do so much testing before surgery tho !!! Lots of luck!!!

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[laceemouse 631]

The way my surgeon explained it is......obese people are much more likely to need OTHER surgeries down the road such as hip or knee replacements. The risks involved with those surgeries are much higher than WLS risks. Being 100 pounds overweight will take 10 years off your life. Down the road all obese people face high risks of diabetes and heart disease. Both are responsible for millions of deaths a year.

Actually, c-sections are more risky than WLS. And lots of people have those (some even want them versus vaginal delivery)

[Christinamo7 4,042]

my husband has always been for whatever I want pretty much. but he was very worried about having part of my stomach cut out.

he has never struggled with his weight and honestly it took a lot of research for him to understand that while he could simply eat less potato chips to drop 5 pounds - my 100+ was not going to budge without drastic measures. And then I developed diabetes.

honestly, had I been approved sooner I would have just gone ahead - and trusted him to come around - but that does not always happen - so you have to be aware.

as it turns out a completely different medical condition delayed my surgery almost a year - and during that time, as we both became more educated he came around. He is not overweight, so the only habit he has changed is I have asked him to not put his bag of chips between us, but rather on the other side of him - and he also now wants Protein powder in his hot cocoa at night. He's thrilled that I no longer have diabetes or high BP and as of now I am back to the weight I was when we married -

wishing you all the success in the world as you educate your spouse and make plans for your new future.

[kittykatja85 34]

My husband did a lot of research on his own and asked me to wait 6 months before I made a decision. (I can be a bit rash sometimes. ) HE was mostly worried because his dad had gotten the band and it didn't work well for him. And my grandfather (Another band) had tons of problems. But he watched all my doctors stuff and attended the meetings with me and went to pre op and agreed this was the best course for us to start family planning.

I suggest maybe watching some materials with him and showing that the pros out way the cons by a lot.

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[rolosmom7 740]

So my first consult with the surgeon was this past friday . I am so excited for whats to come. While we did discuss the different types and the benefits of each surgery; I feel as though he was trying to push me to have RNY instead of VSG. But he said as long as I don't have severe reflux getting the sleeve should be okay.

I was discussing the surgery with my husband again and he has some concerns with getting a part of my stomach removed. He was very supportive in the beginning but now he doesn't want me to do it, he says its too much of a risk

My husband went with me to a support group held after a seminar my surgeon gave. He was wishy-washy before hand, but got on board right after! If your program has something like that, might be worth a try.

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[rolosmom7 740]

My honey wasn't supportive of me having the surgery and since I have came out of surgery on 9/27 I have received approximately 3 text msgs,.one of which was to say "I told you so" in regards to the pain. This surgery changes people...

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I'm sorry. Hope (s)he's come around.

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[luvriden 18]

No its not, it's great

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[TracyBar 132]

The way my surgeon explained it is......obese people are much more likely to need OTHER surgeries down the road such as hip or knee replacements. The risks involved with those surgeries are much higher than WLS risks. Being 100 pounds overweight will take 10 years off your life. Down the road all obese people face high risks of diabetes and heart disease. Both are responsible for millions of deaths a year.

Actually, c-sections are more risky than WLS. And lots of people have those (some even want them versus vaginal delivery)

laceemouse - I hadn't even thought to compare stats of WLS vs C-section. I had a terrible recover from c-section (planned) with my 3rd child 11 years ago. As luck would have it, I had my baby during a baby boom and being a mom 3rd time around I was basically ignored while in hospital. But it was my first section - I got a terrible infection, SO painful and not one nurse was trained well enough obviously to see the infection spreading. On day 4, release day, the surgeon came in and said 'you have an infection!'. Ah yes I do! Raging fever, sickening pain. Laprascopic surgery is less invasive, but the stomach IS being mostly removed. I wonder if the number of deaths is related to the General Anaesthetic...It's scary to hear those stats - but even more scary to read that being 100 lbs. overweight shortens a life by 10 years. I feel sure that I'm going to get many of other diseases and all because of weight....