6 days post op and I've broken down...mentally struggling :(

[Tabatha C 2]

I had the sleeve.. and I know I made the right choice but It's really hard for me right now. I am so overwhelmed and wish I could find more people in my area support groups to be open about this side of reality. I'm only 6 days post op and I am really having a hard time. I am so hungry, I feel starving actually..like how I did before. I drink my little sips to fill me up but am struggling with any liquid intake which is getting scary. I never want to see Jello again.. and the sugar free popsicles we got are waaayyyy too sweet for me. I have just started my Protein shakes 2 days ago (as directed by my dr) and I'm even struggling with that. I have 2 kids under 3 who need to eat well balanced meals. Even cooking for them or feeding them is stressful. I'm not necessarily craving, I just want to be able to eat something. This is definitely harder, for me, than when I delivered my girls. This surgery is a physical process but it is absolutely mental too. I have already broken down and cried. I had to tell my SO and mom to stop bringing home or eating certain foods around me. It is to a point where I sit in my room when they are cooking or having a meal. I am saying all this not to deter or scare anyone.. but to hopefully help someone else be some what mentally prepared for after their surgery. I was told about depression after surgery.. but did not realize it would be like this. It's actually common for patients to second guess their decision and to feel sad. It's just hard to go thru. Hopefully someone else can

relate and help me with sharing their experience.

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[Utleyshair 4]

I feel exactly as you do. Not being able to bite and swallow food is causing deep depression. I don't care what it is I just need to eat something other than Jello. I am very much second guessing this decision and hope it gets better soon. I can't imagine life without eating- I pray I will be able to eat normally, albeit, less sometime soon!

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[Tabatha C 2]

It is so hard. I have a friend who did the "chew and spit" but I'm so scared I'll actually swallow something I don't even dare. I know some people come out of surgery and for weeks they have absolutely no desire to eat anything. I am on the other end. And like I said, it's not necessarily junk food.. just food in general. Had a birthday party yesterday.. TORTURE. so I left my kids and SO there.

One promising thing I keep hearing though is "it gets easier. It gets better. Just be patient"

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[Sai 785]

Tabatha, I'm so sorry you're feeling this way and all of you who are going through it. Please know that the healing phase of your stomach, when it's swollen, and the extra acid you're body is producing to try to make up for the 80% stomach removed is mimicking hunger pains. The first week or so was hard, and like you, I didn't want to deviate or cheat either because it can cause catastrophic and grave consequences on a healing stomach. I'm on day 17 now, and the mimicking hunger pangs just dropped off in the last few days. Hang in there, we're all here for you.

[Pescador 1,374]

If you live with other people in your home, and have children, I know it is harder. I say feed your kids and go for a walk, which will help your mind and your health. Reminds me of the show, My 600 lb. life where the people always bring in fat food. Seriously, head hunger is real, but having others in your home eating pizza is not good for you. Start fixing healthier meals for your children now, and they will hardly know it when the food is so tasty. I wish you all the best and I can hardly believe you regret this surgery. It is the best thing that has ever been given to me in my life. Some day soon you can run and play with those babies!!!!!! May tomorrow be a better day.

[Nikosmama06 59]

Hang in there, girl! You are doing EXACTLY what you need to do; seek advice and support. I don't have much advice for you, but I have a son and a husband (with a normal BMI), so I can relate. Currently I'm at my son's school carnival. There is pizza and all sorts here. I have had to watch my husband devour two slices of my favorite pizza and one tri-tip sandwich. I wanted to chew my arm off, but then I ran into a parent who came up to me and said "You've lost so much weight! What have you done?!". That got me into a more positive mood. I am just here reminding myself that I will hit goal weight and then one day I can have a slice of pizza as a treat. Hang in there and know that you are NOT alone!!

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[Ragdollorchid 128]

I admire you for going through all this and looking after two young children! Reading it made me quit my own whining about my liquid preop diet! take it a day at a time. Like I keep telling myself, feelings don't last forever. You can do this but ask for help to get you through.

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Edited September 24, 2016 by Ragdollorchid

[Tabatha C 2]

Thank you everyone for kind and motivating words. I'm now 11 days post op and unfortunately I have spent the last 2 days in the hospital. I happen to be so special that I fall in a very small percentage of patients who experience a blood clot in one of the veins in my stomach. Partly could be due to genetics but it is something that could happen to any one. I thought it was really bad gas blocked up, so I dealt with the pain for about 3 or 4 days until I was practically crawling into the doctors. The sent me for an emergency ct scan and labs and they found a big clot in the middle of my belly. I have now been on heparin and pain meds for 3 nights. My surgeon says I may be here until Sunday. Upon discharge I will be on blood thinners for 3 months. And to make matters worse, I may not advance to purées until my 3rd week. (Which at this point I don't know what's worse)

If any of you haven't had your procedure yet or just had it done, please please please be mindful of your body. Even if it seems like someth no silly to call the doctors. It doesn't hurt to ask, it's better to ask and get an answer on the phone or be seen and have it be nothing or something small than to dismiss it until it's unbearable and you end up like me in the hospital. I'm anxious to get home and be with my babies and just feel normal again.

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[jenjenp 63]

Did your dr put you on blood thinners when you left the hospital after surgery? I was on them for two weeks after. Anyways glad you caught it. And hope you feel better about everything. I am almost 6 weeks out. I am just at the point of not regretting surgery. I was nauseous all the time. Still not 100%. And food doesn't really taste good to me anymore. Probably a good thing or I wouldn't be where I am. But now I can see the weight coming off so it will get better

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[Leather'nLace 187]

Tabatha, I am so sorry you are going through this.

I wish I had magic words to make you feel better. I will be thinking of you. Rest up and please update us when you can.

[Spectra13 25]

I am 5 days post op and already have cried a few times and second guessed myself. My SO tells me it's going to get better and that's all I can cling to. I feel just as you do. I can't eat the Jello or popsicles either because they are so sweet. My SO did find me Outshine no sugar added ones and they are so much more tolerable. Also found warm chicken bouillon and warm tea is good for my belly. All we can do is pray. Xo

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[Pescador 1,374]

Tabatha, so sorry you are suffering this setback but 1). You knew when to go to the doctor/hospital, and 2). They found the problem and are treating it. What is so important here is that you don't rely on uneducated people here giving you medical advice that something might be gas pain, etc.

Trust your gut instinct, your judgment, and your body, and make sure you get medical treatment, the life you save may be YOURS!

[Melanie89 56]

Hey. I'm 11 days post op for the first week I wasn't hungry but all of a sudden the hunger has come back. I try to drink lots of hot tea normally helps or just keep busy. I started my soft food diet 4 days earlier than I was suppose to and so far so good. But honestly hot milky tea.

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[Browneyedgirl41 176]

I feel the same way and I have a 9 year old son and husband who had steak the other night while I slowly slurped down soup- AGAIN. I was not a fan of Soup before and even more so now.

I stay in my room a lot to avoid being around the kitchen. Made my kid Breakfast this morning. No question about it- this is more difficult than I expected and I have had MANY second thoughts (too late now!).

I keep telling myself it's head hunger and take my antacids, but boy it feels like real hunger to me! And I am hungry a lot- more than I was pre surgery.

I'm not sure about all of this, not that it matters now. What's done is done. I'm too early out to really make any hard line assumptions yet. However, if I could go back in time right now, I'd probably cancel my surgery. I hope I feel differently in 6 months.

[allies journey 144]

Get well soon and I totally agree listen to your body. The surgeons have been doing this for a long time and the only dumb questions are the ones you don't ask.

Haven't had my surgery yet but will definitely keep you in mind and your experience. .

Allie

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