When you trust your surgeon but you're mad at him too.

[ALittleMe0914 69]

Hi Guys!

I am finding myself wanting to go on a rant about my surgeon and just curious if anyone has had similar experience.

I saw my surgeon yesterday for my final pre-op weigh in and consult. The first time I met with him I thought he was kind, knowledgeable and I know he has a great reputation. Fast forward to today ......... I first met with his NP, who gave me my instructions for the few days before surgery. She told me that they found an abnormality in my bloodwork, and that I tested positive for a Lupus Anticoagulant. Has this every happened to any of you? While I have heard of Lupus, I have never really heard of it this specific abnormality (it's not a diagnosis).

Anyway, she told me that my surgeon would come in and talk more in detail about it. He did come in, but he seemed to be in such a rush to the point that he made me talk really fast and gave me anxiety. He didn't seem to want to talk to me or answer my questions. I asked him about the abnormality and what I should do ..... and he basically said "don't worry about it, I'm going to give you some shots to take at home after surgery, otherwise call your PCP and she'll refer you to a specialist, I am only worried about your surgery." I asked him about the day of surgery and what to expect, he just said "it'll be fine", and nothing else. I asked if I would have stitches/staples in the incisions, he basically told me he doesn't "close me up" but they'll prob use stitches. After each question he said "is that it" "is that it", I was just so turned off by his lack of wanting to deal with me.

I don't know how to accurately explain how I felt. I felt like I was a nuisance to him and he was so rushed and really didn't want to be talking to me. His NP however, answered all of my questions, was patient, informative and kind, and spent some extra time with me after I saw him to make sure I understand my "day of" requirements.

I know this guy is great as his job and at the end of the day that's what I really care about. But I can't help but to feel a little bothered by his demeanor. Is this just how surgeons behave because they are always on the go?

[kimini 175]

In my limited experience with surgeons, I feel like they are not the same as other doctors. They don't necessarily have the patient skills or "bedside manner" we are accustomed to with other doctors, but that doesn't mean they are not good at what they do. It's just that what they do best usually involves a "sleeping" patient that they don't have to talk to. My surgeon's office gave me a booklet, and it basically says to read the whole thing, and if you call the office to ask a question that is in the book, they will just refer you to the page in the book. I rely on my booklet for everything! As for the day of surgery, the nurses and anesthetists should be able to answer all your questions and allay any fears you might have. If you are confident in your surgeon's ability to perform the surgery, I would focus on that and reach out to your regular doctor for answers about your abnormal bloodwork. Good luck!

[KristenLe 5,979]

@@ALittleMe0914 Surgeon's operate on people who are under anesthesia for a reason - they usually have a shitty bedside manner and often have a God-complex. That's okay - you don't need them for their personality - but for their surgical skills. If you didn't already know - this test would indicate you have a higher risk of developing clots - which is why he'll put you on blood thinners. I would be sure your PCP gets your blood work and schedule an appointment with them soon to follow-up.

[kimini 175]

@@KristenLe you said what I was thinking! I was on blood thinners as well. I just assumed that was a normal thing they do.

[ALittleMe0914 69]

@@KristenLe

Thank you! I didn't know what the test meant at the time and the word Lupus kept getting tossed around. I did call my PCP today and she is reaching out to get the bloodwork so we can address it post op if need be.

I do have to come to terms with the fact that my surgeon is just that - a surgeon. He has no time for the conscious/nervous version of me. He 100% is one of those with the "God Complex", but as I said, he is reputable, and I think I only care that he is good at his job and at this time next week I am on the road to a smooth recovery.

[Montana Gal 448]

I agree with @@KristenLe, surgical skills are the most important! I needed to be reminded of this as well 7 months ago. At my first appointment with my surgeon he was kind, patient and caring. By my next appointment and all the way through to my follow up appointments, his true personality came out. His answers became short and to the point and his time seemed valuable only to him. From that point on my "go to" person in his office was his kind, knowledgeable Bariatric Nurse. I called her for most everything, pre and post op! Keep us posted on the blood work regarding Lupus, it could just be a false positive and needs to be repeated.

[Ragdollorchid 128]

Yes. After my appointment yesterday to set my date for surgery, this surgeon joins my son's surgeon from years ago as two of the smartest and strangest people I've ever met. Lol. And like two of you shared, this doctor was personable the first time I met him. I am sure that their job is extremely stressful especially if they really do care. I can't imagine staying focused for hours working inside someone's body. I think the biggest concern is their success rate. My opinion.

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