Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Please allow me to vent.......



Recommended Posts

I had my VGS on 4/9/15, and have gone from 285-170, so far. I feel like a new person completely. I, like you, have all the same skin issues, and frustrations.

Something that has helped me immensely is wearing compression garments! They really work wonders, and people have actually asked me if I've had surgery to remove the excess skin! My favorite is called a "skinny tee" (skinnytees.com). I never leave the house without one on. They can be pulled down past your butt, and hold everything, from the boobs down, very still and small! The difference is amazing! And they are not uncomfortable at all, to me!

I carried most of my weight in my butt and thighs, so my legs are what trouble me the most. So, I wear jeggings most of the time. These are leggings made of a denim that contains spandex. I like them tight, for maximum control! My butt is GONE now, and my boobs have shrunk from a 42 FF, to a 36D. Unfortunately, that's a 36D LONG!!! Wearing my skinny tees helps to keep them in the bra, but smashes them just a little. I've decided that I'm fine with smaller boobs for now. Someday, I may do something about them.

The clothes I look best in are like tight athletic wear. Sometimes I will wear workout capris under a pair of pants for maximum control. I'd rather not wear girdles or things like that. These make me feel skinny and energetic, not crammed into body armor!

By the way, for those flabby yammies (that's what we call the underarm wobble), skinny tees makes shirts with sleeves, also! Holds everything in tightly, without pain!

I hope this helps a little!



Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest

13 hours ago, godblessedchild said:

Hey ladies 50 and above, congrats to all of you. But I have some concerns, I'm 6 months out and I've only lost about 37lbs and I have a long way to go to reach goal. I'm craving a lot. How can I get my body back into the losing mild.

Are you talking about age 50 or 50 lbs? The reason I ask is, that I am over 50 and sleeved on 1/10/17 had lost 31 lb since sleeve date. Well now, scale shows gain of 2 lbs which didn't have me worried but now stuck at this weight (which means loss of 29 lbs in 2.5 months). I know there are stalls, and when I read your post picture that being me in 3 1/2 months. I was thinking of trying to get back to 2 shakes a day and protein/veg at night like pre-op. Let me know if you get "unstuck".

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

On 2/15/2017 at 8:33 PM, Idahome said:

Once I was heavy and my skin was smoother and tighter than all the other "old ladies" I knew. I did look younger, but the difference I envied was not their skin, but how easily they fit into their world. They could cross their legs, not have to ask for an extra seat belt, not have to portion their energy for the day or pre-assess a restaurant by the seating available. Sure I'd love to look like a model rather than a melted model, but I am fiercely proud to fit in these days. I'm in the middle of the group, having my picture taken and being part of the experience instead of watching from the edge or waiting to see the cell phone pics. These wrinkles - I earned them fighting - and winning the toughest battle of my life. You did too. You are a warrior!

Hi, and I thank you so much for what you said above. I am sorry for the delay in my reply (I'm) not usually like that, but I have been so depressed the last few weeks that I feel up to my nose in sand and mud that I can't escape from. It's torture. I am battling awful urges to eat and some days I lose the battle. I am mortally terrified of the potential outcome and all I do is take pills to sleep as much as I can to escape. But then when I am awake, I feel so awful physically from what I took to sleep. No one ever has to tell me about hell, I'm there (not to mention the Florida heat).. I used to feel like a fighter (a wrinkly old lady one) and a success story. Now, there's just the wrinkly part left. I feel dead inside. I am sorry for this intrusion on your time. If you are a praying woman, please remember me to God, and may he have mercy on my soul. I wish you only the best. Cassie

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest

1 hour ago, Cassie111 said:

Hi, and I thank you so much for what you said above. I am sorry for the delay in my reply (I'm) not usually like that, but I have been so depressed the last few weeks that I feel up to my nose in sand and mud that I can't escape from. It's torture. I am battling awful urges to eat and some days I lose the battle. I am mortally terrified of the potential outcome and all I do is take pills to sleep as much as I can to escape. But then when I am awake, I feel so awful physically from what I took to sleep. No one ever has to tell me about hell, I'm there (not to mention the Florida heat).. I used to feel like a fighter (a wrinkly old lady one) and a success story. Now, there's just the wrinkly part left. I feel dead inside. I am sorry for this intrusion on your time. If you are a praying woman, please remember me to God, and may he have mercy on my soul. I wish you only the best. Cassie

So sorry to hear you fell like this. Are you from somewhere else originally and just hate FL? I just wondered, I hate the La. originally from somewhere else, living here is very depressing. You look like like you reached a great weight, that's great.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hey, nope.....native Floridian! People usually say "you must be used to it by now". But my thinking is just the opposite. It's BECAUSE I've been enduring for 57 years that only makes me hate it more every year. Especially since we have NO fall, and very little winter. I don't own more than 1 light sweater and a very thin fancy long jacket in case I'm going out. I really think not having those 2 seasons are the main cause of my hating it here so much. If I had something to look forward to during the terrible summer months,(I don't even have to wait for summer, our daytime temps are in the mid 80's) If I had something to look forward to, I know I would be happier. And there is no option for me to move further north. I would love to live in the Carolina's. (hubby would like to go back where he lived many years, New Hampshire) but my son Danny, my only child, lives near-by and I'm REALLY hoping that he and his wife will want to get pregnant one of these days! He and I are extremely close. THEN, there's my 12 year old goddaughter Katie. I have helped to raise her since birth and she is my "buddy" for movies and shopping. I couldn't love her more if she were a blood relative. And so it goes...... Sorry about not loving where you live either. It can be very depressing. Where have you lived before? Just curious. Thanks for writing and reading my reply. Take care,

Cassie

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest

1 hour ago, Cassie111 said:

Hey, nope.....native Floridian! People usually say "you must be used to it by now". But my thinking is just the opposite. It's BECAUSE I've been enduring for 57 years that only makes me hate it more every year. Especially since we have NO fall, and very little winter. I don't own more than 1 light sweater and a very thin fancy long jacket in case I'm going out. I really think not having those 2 seasons are the main cause of my hating it here so much. If I had something to look forward to during the terrible summer months,(I don't even have to wait for summer, our daytime temps are in the mid 80's) If I had something to look forward to, I know I would be happier. And there is no option for me to move further north. I would love to live in the Carolina's. (hubby would like to go back where he lived many years, New Hampshire) but my son Danny, my only child, lives near-by and I'm REALLY hoping that he and his wife will want to get pregnant one of these days! He and I are extremely close. THEN, there's my 12 year old goddaughter Katie. I have helped to raise her since birth and she is my "buddy" for movies and shopping. I couldn't love her more if she were a blood relative. And so it goes...... Sorry about not loving where you live either. It can be very depressing. Where have you lived before? Just curious. Thanks for writing and reading my reply. Take care,

Cassie

Believe it or not, I was born in Florida (don't claim it!). We moved to NY when I was 9---never forget that wonderful day in October of 1969 :lol: Seriously! I remember as we drove north and the trees were like those beautiful leaves kids would bring after they were up north. I loved the snow, ice skating, tobaggonning, sledding, and we still had summers on the beach, waterskiing, Playland (think Zoltar in the movie Big w/T Hanks). At least you have a movie buddy, I have no one. My son lives in Chattanooga, TN which I love....the mountains, things to do, not as hot as La. I totally understand you. After NY we lived in Ohio, a mile or so from the Great Lakes, yes beaches, waterfalls, downtown Cleveland, concerts, fun things. Then I moved to NYC after Ohio. From there I met my hub....drum roll....online. HATE Louisiana, can't leave because I built a business--- 8,500 sq ft building. I feel BEYOND stuck here. Hopefully my "new dream" will happen and someone will want to buy this and I can GO!!!!! Not sure where but funny, I have looked at FL (just cuz of taxes in my old age). I just want a community where I can walk to stores and things. Not to sure I want snow in my old age either. I have a friend getting a place in Conway, NH for when they retire, but want near Carolinas for winter.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

WOW! Your story sounds a lot like my husband's, as far as moving around many times! He's originally from Long Island, and has also lived in West Virginia, (Florida as a child), back to Long Island, then Washington state, then New Hampshire, then finally here in South Florida. And guess what??? We are one of the few success stories of meeting online with a happy ending! We met in 2001, did the long distance thing between NH and FL for quite awhile, then he moved here and we married in 2003. 13 years, not bad at all. (my 1st marriage lasted 18 years, 11 of them practically living as roommates. BEST FATHER ever, not the best husband) If you are thinking of Florida as an option, the furthest south you should consider is a town called Port Saint Lucie, we lived there for about 7 years and LOVED it. It's on the east coast (hate the west coast) a little less than 2 hours south of Orlando. Try to avoid central Florida .....if it's possible, even more hot than here. North of Orlando would be the best place. A lot of nice places in the Panhandle. Ever been to Disney? I am a Disney FREAK and have been more times than I can count (literally). Love and collect all things Disney. I know you don't have a movie buddy :( but do yourself a favor and go see the new version of MY favorite Disney movie, Beauty and the Beast. I thought I would hate it because I was loyal to the original, but it was wonderful!!! I would see it again for sure.

BTW, you've lost 97 lbs. since January???? AMAZING to say the very least!!! My weight loss has been strange. In the 1st 7 months, I lost the first 100 lbs. I thought THAT was amazing! In the ensuing 14 months, is the amount of time it's taken me to lose the additional 36!!! I've heard of slowing down, but this has really been a loooong slooow journey for me. Mind you, however it came off, I'm generally happy overall. I just wish I could have lost another 10 by now. I know my original goal was 160 and I'm now 150, but you find out when you get to a certain number, you sometimes feel you'd like a lower number. 145 is my final goal number, so I need SIX more and it just won't come! Now truth be told, I rarely do my walks anymore, which could most likey be a game changer. But my "oomph" to do much of anything is zero at the moment. It's been a very rough 2017 so far, a lot of stress and pressures. And then 1 week ago today, I had to put down my beloved 4-legged child "Bruce" that we've had for almost 11 years. You have to be a true animal lover to understand, but it was 1 of the worst days of my life. Having pets, mostly dogs, all my life, I have had to do that before. But Bruce was my true buddy, always near me and it just happened at a really bad time. But he is now running free in heaven, which is great because with his very bad hips and legs, walking had turned difficult, and up and down all night TRYING to get a comfortable position to lie in. It was time, but he'll be in my heart forever, as all those who came before him are. I've rambled enough, I have many things to get done today and PRAY that I can force myself to go walk the mall. (not surprisingly, I do NOT walk outside, only in the air conditioned mall, lol) Have a blessed weekend, and hope to chat again soon. Take care, Cassie

PS.....2 things, I don't think I know your name, lol and what part of NY do you live in? If it's Long Island, I guarantee my husband has lived there at one time or another!!!!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Im not close to goal yet, but I do fear what I will end up looking like. I assume my stomach is screwed but I am stressed about arms and thighs. What struck me about your post is the start weight and goal weight are within pounds of mine. I agree there should be some plastic....something.....included in the process. One "cute shirt" idea.....shoulder exposing shirts are popular now. They still have the sleeve bottom but look fun.



Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest

19 hours ago, Cassie111 said:

WOW! Your story sounds a lot like my husband's, as far as moving around many times! He's originally from Long Island, and has also lived in West Virginia, (Florida as a child), back to Long Island, then Washington state, then New Hampshire, then finally here in South Florida. And guess what??? We are one of the few success stories of meeting online with a happy ending! We met in 2001, did the long distance thing between NH and FL for quite awhile, then he moved here and we married in 2003. 13 years, not bad at all. (my 1st marriage lasted 18 years, 11 of them practically living as roommates. BEST FATHER ever, not the best husband) If you are thinking of Florida as an option, the furthest south you should consider is a town called Port Saint Lucie, we lived there for about 7 years and LOVED it. It's on the east coast (hate the west coast) a little less than 2 hours south of Orlando. Try to avoid central Florida .....if it's possible, even more hot than here. North of Orlando would be the best place. A lot of nice places in the Panhandle. Ever been to Disney? I am a Disney FREAK and have been more times than I can count (literally). Love and collect all things Disney. I know you don't have a movie buddy :( but do yourself a favor and go see the new version of MY favorite Disney movie, Beauty and the Beast. I thought I would hate it because I was loyal to the original, but it was wonderful!!! I would see it again for sure.

BTW, you've lost 97 lbs. since January???? AMAZING to say the very least!!! My weight loss has been strange. In the 1st 7 months, I lost the first 100 lbs. I thought THAT was amazing! In the ensuing 14 months, is the amount of time it's taken me to lose the additional 36!!! I've heard of slowing down, but this has really been a loooong slooow journey for me. Mind you, however it came off, I'm generally happy overall. I just wish I could have lost another 10 by now. I know my original goal was 160 and I'm now 150, but you find out when you get to a certain number, you sometimes feel you'd like a lower number. 145 is my final goal number, so I need SIX more and it just won't come! Now truth be told, I rarely do my walks anymore, which could most likey be a game changer. But my "oomph" to do much of anything is zero at the moment. It's been a very rough 2017 so far, a lot of stress and pressures. And then 1 week ago today, I had to put down my beloved 4-legged child "Bruce" that we've had for almost 11 years. You have to be a true animal lover to understand, but it was 1 of the worst days of my life. Having pets, mostly dogs, all my life, I have had to do that before. But Bruce was my true buddy, always near me and it just happened at a really bad time. But he is now running free in heaven, which is great because with his very bad hips and legs, walking had turned difficult, and up and down all night TRYING to get a comfortable position to lie in. It was time, but he'll be in my heart forever, as all those who came before him are. I've rambled enough, I have many things to get done today and PRAY that I can force myself to go walk the mall. (not surprisingly, I do NOT walk outside, only in the air conditioned mall, lol) Have a blessed weekend, and hope to chat again soon. Take care, Cassie

PS.....2 things, I don't think I know your name, lol and what part of NY do you live in? If it's Long Island, I guarantee my husband has lived there at one time or another!!!!

Ok, we should friend each other thru here. :D WAIT!!! Are you ready?? My husband and I met online too. I moved from NYC (lived in the fun East Village area--across the street from 2 parks---LOVE NYC!!) to Louisiana. I moved here in November of 98. As you can see we are still together, I laugh when you say not so good husband. I just think we are different creatures. I REALLY miss hanging with my friends, brunches on Sundays, walking all day, walking around parks, street fairs, just so much there. I am sorry about Bruce, and yes, I am such an animal lover that I built a dog hotel here. That is what I do 7 days a week for 11 years. To this day I say I lost 'the love of my live' 3 yrs ago. I have other dogs from before and after Willie, but NO one is Willie. I loved that boy more than anyone in my life. Yes, I have an older son lives in TN but that dog was my savior. I would get really not so much depressed, as blue living here and he was my end all be all. Never lived in Long Island, but I lived in Port Chester as a kid. I would give anything to live there, but homes and taxes are a killer there. Anyone my age has pretty much gotten or are getting out.

....my name is Ginny.....oh and yes, I do want to see Beauty and the Beast on a big screen (although, the smart part of me knows it doesn't happen all the time but don't want to go to the theatre cuz of shootings----we had the shooting here with Amy Schumer's movie)....I pretty much wait and watch Netflix. :) I have to catch up and watch Cinderella....I love those dresses. I am not a Disney fan though. I told my son, I will take the grandkids anywhere in the world, but never Disney.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Hi Ginny, I am SO sorry for the long delay in my response.....again! I haven't been on my FB or aol account for about 2 weeks, which makes for a lot on not replying to people I really want to talk to AND over 400 pieces. Partly because of the battle I've had with depression and anxiety for over 30 years. Meds are NOT a cure, just keeps your head above water...usually. Bruce hit me super hard, sounds a lot like the loss of your "baby" I know the feeling all to well. I think a big part of the problem (other than my connection with him) was that every time when I've had to make this horrific decision, I've always had other pets waiting for me at home. At least they were a bit of a moments of distraction. I could hold them close when I had a cry fest. No this time. And even though my best friend swears a day will come when I get another dog, I've told her NOT, NO WAY, Ever!!!! I'm told old and have to many problems and issues to ever go through that devastation again. I've had so very many "4 legged "loves of my life", that I will end with the blessings from God to have had them for as long as I did.

So odd how you also met your hubby online....NEVER expected that in a million years. And I had to go through a dozen or so "frogs" before I find my prince. 15 years since we met and 13 married. I consider 3 things that have kept me alive, when I should have been dead ages ago. !) My 32 year old son Danny, who is THE love of my life. I doubt many of been as blessed as I have been having the best son anyone could ever even hope for. We talk almost every day, that's how close we are. Without him, there would be no will to live. 2) THE miracle sent to Tom and I when God had us meet online. This man has to be the most loving, caring, compassionate and hard working man I've ever known. He literally saved me from myself, as I am my own worst enemy. He treats me like a queen and forgives my moods and occassional outbursts and never holds it against me.

My "bad" husband referred to my 1st husband Mike, who for 2 people at the beginning and lasted about the first 7 seven years and the last 11 were really terribly rough. He moved into the guest room and we became roommates. Devastating because I finally got to him to admit, against his better judgement, to finally telling the truth and confess that he had simply fallen out of love with me, partly due to my inability to lose weight. I met him at about 155 lbs., and after Danny was born my highest was 210 of which I only took off about 25. We both agreed to this roommate set up and not to divorce because we KNEW what effect it would have had on Danny. Only child and totally in love with both of us. He would not have adjusted to either of us being a "part time parent. Michael was the FATHER of the CENTURY and that is why I don't doubt our decision for even a second. We were both happy to sacrifice any happiness we might find in or for the good and well being of our Danny. Our time was to come later on. Never made a better choice.

Though he "did that to me", his father abilities more than made up for it. He may have changed as many diapers as I did. And helped me during those 1st rough,no sleeping months by staying up with his boy and letting me get some sleep. And he was a wonderful provider. He made good money as a Miami Police Officer, rising to the rank of Major, which in those days, those jobs usually went to minorities. But he kept driving forward and fought and clawed his way very close to nearly the top. I was , and still am very proud of the things he could do despite so many obstacles along the way.

My Tommy has been perfect from day one (of course and only naturally) he has one or 2 traits that drive me INSANE! But they in no way out number the good. I'm also go glad to have met a decent Christian man to connect with me on that level. We try to let God do everything for us....You know, "Let go and let God". We are desperately looking for a new apartment and I so believe from the bottom of my heart that he will provide us with the perfect place to go.

OOPS, I forgot #3) My 12 year old goddaughter Katie. First held her the day she was born, and I knew at that very instant. we would be so connected to each other as long as I am allowed to be on this earth. We did the movies again yesterday and I got to keep her from Friday through tomorrow because of Spring Break, I was SO totally thrilled to have her with me that long. Talk about love? She is constantly showing me her deep love for me every time we're together. She touches my heart to the core. She is my sunshine every single day.

Enough of me.....I want you to tell me how your journey has gone since January. Everyday now, I'm eating something I shouldn't and I am truly, truly frightened of the potential of what could happen if I don't change my ways and attitude. Perk up and get out of this hole I seem to have crawled into. If I don't start my mall walking again and SOON, I think I'm doomed. I've gone from 149 to 152.5 which for some people, its not that terrible. But after 3-4 comes back, then I'm sure you know what USUALLY happens after that. I actually don't think I could recover if I went back to 287 or even anything over 160. My size 10's won't fit if I get to 160. I pray every night for the Lord to take this "eating" obsession away from me, but so far, to no avail. Terrified is a much better word to use. Please say a prayer for me , as I will do the same for you for whatever plagues you currently. BTW , you mentioned at the top of your last post that we should become "friends" on here. . Not sure how to go about that. But if you do, just "friend" me (if that's' the way that goes and will certainly accept!!

Hope your week has gone well so far. Take care, Cassie

PS.......SO SO happy about your doggie job. You must love them the way I do.... and that's A LOT!!! God bless you for your gifts that I know you show them by yourlove for them.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • cryoder22

      Day 1 of pre-op liquid diet (3 weeks) and I'm having a hard time already. I feel hungry and just want to eat. I got the protein and supplements recommend by my program and having a hard time getting 1 down. My doctor / nutritionist has me on the following:
      1 protein shake (bariatric advantage chocolate) with 8 oz of fat free milk 1 snack = 1 unjury protein shake (root beer) 1 protein shake (bariatric advantage orange cream) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein bar 1 protein shake (bariatric advantace orange cream or chocolate) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein soup (chicken) 3 servings of sugar free jello and popsicles throughout the day. 64 oz of water (I have flavor packets). Hot tea and coffee with splenda has been approved as well. Does anyone recommend anything for the next 3 weeks?
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        All I can tell you is that for me, it got easier after the first week. The hunger pains got less intense and I kind of got used to it and gave up torturing myself by thinking about food. But if you can, get anything tempting out of the house and avoid being around people who are eating. I sent my kids to my parents' house for two weeks so I wouldn't have to prepare meals I couldn't eat. After surgery, the hunger was totally gone.

    • buildabetteranna

      I have my final approval from my insurance, only thing holding up things is one last x-ray needed, which I have scheduled for the fourth of next month, which is my birthday.

      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BetterLeah

      Woohoo! I have 7 more days till surgery, So far I am already down a total of 20lbs since I started this journey. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Well done! I'm 9 days away from surgery! Keep us updated!

    • Ladiva04

      Hello,
      I had my surgery on the 25th of June of this year. Starting off at 117 kilos.😒
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Congrats on the surgery!

    • Sandra Austin Tx

      I’m 6 days post op as of today. I had the gastric bypass 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×