Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

Who did you tell?



Recommended Posts

I'm getting banded next month, and I have reservations about telling

friends, coworkers and even some family members about my decision.

They've all seen me lose weight on some diet/program, only to put it all back on again.

I've had to tell my supervisors at work because of scheduling and sick leave concerns, but no one else at work--I don't want people watching my weight on a daily basis, checking out what I put in my mouth, etc...and I don't need their "supportive" remarks.

My partner and one other close friend knows, and that's IT as far as my personal relationships go. I've yet to tell my parents (who live out of state) mainly because I hope to surprise them with the new, improved, fabulous me....

Am I being paranoid or unreasonable?:)

Inquiring minds need to know!

Dana

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I totally understand why you don't want to tell anybody. I'm right there with ya! I will be banded tomorrow. I told the people who I eat out with... close friends and family. Friends I see every other month, none of their business. As for work, I told my supervisor for the same reasons, and 3 others at work who have been struggling with weight loss as well. They know it's secret.

Only tell who you want to tell. I am going to say, "I cut down on my portions, calories and alcohol" ~ the rest is up to their imagination... ! haha...

Dana

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

WOW!

Tomorrow...how cool for you! And you have a great name as well!:)

Good luck to you on your surgery...check back in and let us know how things are going!

Dana

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I was banded in Dec. and theres still a few people who I work with and see everyday who dont' know. And I'm not planning on telling them. I told family and very close friends, people in my church - there are 4 in my church who had the gastric bypass so they've been encouraging and a brother of a lady in my church just had it done by the same surgeon and has been attending support group so I'm sure it would've been 'out' before long anyway. Most people think I'm just counting my calories and exercising - because I am - I tell everyone about FitDay - Free Weight Loss and Diet Journal and how much I've been walking. I was able to get away with it at work bc I had it done in the off season when everyone is laid off and the course is closed. My family and friends have been wonderful and very supportive - that is all except my monster in law - who I wasn't going to tell my dh filled her in.

The ONLY regret I have in telling people is when they ask how much I've lost.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

i dont know..i have told alot of people.. i dont know i think its cool...im having surgery tommorow morning

i have told my whole family and all my friends.. i guess it just doesnt bother me...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I told every one, ive had both positive and negitive responses, the negitive is from people that dont really understand weight loss surgery, and think its an easy way out, which it is not. People react to it in very diffent ways depending on how much they understand the procedure.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That's what bugs me--the thought that this is the "easy way out"--and as far as I can tell, that's pretty darned far from the truth.

I know quite a few HWP folks who just can't give up their caffeine, sugar, nicotine, bread, etc...how about trying to give up a large part of your food intake?

It p*sses me off. I'm not a weak person, in fact I think that the decision to have this procedure done in the first place takes a fair amount of courage.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well, I only told my parents, brother, and a couple of other people. THEY took care of informing everyone else. Heck, everyone knows now, including my mom's hairdresser and many of my dad's clents. It's really quite irritating. I would have liked to not be under such a microscope and I would have really liked to have had the choice of telling people of not.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Well, I only told my parents, brother, and a couple of other people. THEY took care of informing everyone else. Heck, everyone knows now, including my mom's hairdresser and many of my dad's clents. It's really quite irritating. I would have liked to not be under such a microscope and I would have really liked to have had the choice of telling people of not.

Yep, I know what you mean. My husband took care of telling everybody, including our hairdresser, for me. He is a wonderful man but he loves to flap his jaws! :phanvan I am sometimes appalled by this little habit of his.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

well Laurend if the hairdresser knows you can believe the entire town knows too! (no offense to hairdressers, my dd and niece are both and I know first hand how the gossip in the shop is)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

well Laurend if the hairdresser knows you can believe the entire town knows too! (no offense to hairdressers, my dd and niece are both and I know first hand how the gossip in the shop is)
Yeah, probably. I've tried to ask my parents to keep quiet about it, but they don't seem to understand why they should. And apparently, it isn't enough that I'm asking them to do it.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I only told my husband and my parents. They all keep their mouths shut.

What I do in my personal life is NO ONE's business. They do not need to know and I do not feel obligated to tell them. When people comment on my weight loss, I tell them that I am eating more Protein, less of everything else, and that I am exercising more. All of these things are true.

The truth is that the Lap Band is not the easy way out -- you still have to watch what you eat and exercise. I'm not interested in other people's uneducated opinions -- anyone who tells me that I took the easy way out doesn't understand how the Lap Band works and has never struggled with their own weight. But I don't feel like having this conversation with all the skinny people in the world, so I keep my business to myself.

Some people here have told a lot of people without any problems. It's your own decision who you decide to tell (or not) and there is no right answer, except what feels right to you. Good luck!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

First of all I am in the mindset that I really don't care what other people think. This is my struggle in life. I know darned well all my family and friends have their own struggles and I am finally dealing with mine once and for all.

My sister in law and supposed good friend said to me one day "don't you think I struggle every day to keep at this weight?" She was really offensive and acted like I was taking an easy way out. You know what, I DONT CARE! She smokes. She can't quit. I just put down my cigarettes two years ago and haven't had one since. I throw that in her face. She has her struggles and I have mine. The nerve of some people.

This summer there have been a lot of gatherings for b-days, cookout, etc. I just had surgery two weeks ago and have been on a pre-op and post-op diets. I have received a lot of looks when sipping on my Soups, etc. and everyone else is downing burgers and dogs. So, I tell them. I have no shame.

I am very supportive and try not to judge others. EVERYONE has their own issues, whether it be cigarettes, food, drugs, alcohol, relationships, depression, etc. The way I see it, at least we have the courage to due something permanant about ours!

Good luck to all of you!

Angie

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • cryoder22

      Day 1 of pre-op liquid diet (3 weeks) and I'm having a hard time already. I feel hungry and just want to eat. I got the protein and supplements recommend by my program and having a hard time getting 1 down. My doctor / nutritionist has me on the following:
      1 protein shake (bariatric advantage chocolate) with 8 oz of fat free milk 1 snack = 1 unjury protein shake (root beer) 1 protein shake (bariatric advantage orange cream) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein bar 1 protein shake (bariatric advantace orange cream or chocolate) 1 snack = 1 unjury protein soup (chicken) 3 servings of sugar free jello and popsicles throughout the day. 64 oz of water (I have flavor packets). Hot tea and coffee with splenda has been approved as well. Does anyone recommend anything for the next 3 weeks?
      · 1 reply
      1. NickelChip

        All I can tell you is that for me, it got easier after the first week. The hunger pains got less intense and I kind of got used to it and gave up torturing myself by thinking about food. But if you can, get anything tempting out of the house and avoid being around people who are eating. I sent my kids to my parents' house for two weeks so I wouldn't have to prepare meals I couldn't eat. After surgery, the hunger was totally gone.

    • buildabetteranna

      I have my final approval from my insurance, only thing holding up things is one last x-ray needed, which I have scheduled for the fourth of next month, which is my birthday.

      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • BetterLeah

      Woohoo! I have 7 more days till surgery, So far I am already down a total of 20lbs since I started this journey. 
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Well done! I'm 9 days away from surgery! Keep us updated!

    • Ladiva04

      Hello,
      I had my surgery on the 25th of June of this year. Starting off at 117 kilos.😒
      · 1 reply
      1. NeonRaven8919

        Congrats on the surgery!

    • Sandra Austin Tx

      I’m 6 days post op as of today. I had the gastric bypass 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×