Post op regrets topics - not popular

[GinaCampbell 434]

Exactly. Your not looking for input, just attention. Shut up, stop whining and get over yourself. You'll be fat and happy again in no time. Just read all the other whining posts. Some of us accept responsibility for our decisions without acting like victims. If you were so well informed and did your research, how are you so clueless? You need help.

See, there you go! Bet you feel better now!

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[justhere4theshow 462]

@@GinaCampbell, I apologized to you, as have several other people, and yet you continue the nastiness. You are giving as good as you get. What is it that you want to hear that you might find helpful? People have gone so far as to validate you, and you still find a way to be snarky. You are not helping anyone here. So as you gather your thoughts about how to further lash out at me, remember that you are the one keeping all of this ugly. We have tried to be nice, so why can't you?

[GinaCampbell 434]

Again, I wonder what brings you here, to this thread?

Why do you follow my threads and posts if I am not helpful to you?

If you don't wish to hear from me, move along to another thread.

And you are not the judge of who I help and who I don't.

I am not "lashing" out at anyone. It is you following me, attention seeking from me.

I have made my objective here on this thread (clue is in the title), very clear.

I didn't start this thread to "hear" anything in particular.

But I will not be bullied off my own thread.

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[Christinamo7 4,042]

***Internet 101***

just because that is your objective does not mean that it is the reader's objective in their replies. they are allowed to have their OWN objectives just like you are allowed to have yours. their reply comes from THEIR perspective and really does not have to fit in to your agenda. your agenda does not have to fit in to their agenda either. there is room for everyone here.

there is no rule that someone has to agree with you to comment on a thread you start. this is a public forum. Most people have tried to be very nice to you in your difficulties. just because they disagree or question some statements does not mean they are bullying you. if you feel someone is bullying you the best thing to do is put them on ignore. you won't see their posts and it becomes a nicer experience for you.

just because you start a thread does not make it yours. it belongs to a public forum. it can veer off topic or take any kinds of left turns much like conversations in person can do.

[justhere4theshow 462]

People have tried to help you and say the right things. I truly find you fascinating. Maybe I am honestly interested to know what you need to hear to make you feel as though you have met your objective. People don't have to agree with you, and they don't have to agree with me. I just don't get why you think you shouldn't respect any other point of view the way that you are insisting that others should respect yours. I admitted the fact that I made you feel disrespected, and yet you continue to criticize me and anyone who won't agree with you. I like a good discussion, because that is how I learn about people and experiences. I don't always say the exact right things in the exact right way, but I never intend to insult anyone the way that I have you. I just never encountered anyone quite like you, and I really am interested to know what you came here to accomplish. This will be my last comment out of respect for you and your point of view. I wish you well, and that is the honest truth. Sorry we couldn't seem to understand each other...

[sleevenv 483]

She's a sick person. She's getting off on the attention. Let's not give her any more. Bet she responds within 30 seconds, because that's the way she rolls.

[GinaCampbell 434]

***Internet 101***

just because that is your objective does not mean that it is the reader's objective in their replies. they are allowed to have their OWN objectives just like you are allowed to have yours. their reply comes from THEIR perspective and really does not have to fit in to your agenda. your agenda does not have to fit in to their agenda either. there is room for everyone here.

there is no rule that someone has to agree with you to comment on a thread you start. this is a public forum. Most people have tried to be very nice to you in your difficulties. just because they disagree or question some statements does not mean they are bullying you. if you feel someone is bullying you the best thing to do is put them on ignore. you won't see their posts and it becomes a nicer experience for you.

just because you start a thread does not make it yours. it belongs to a public forum. it can veer off topic or take any kinds of left turns much like conversations in person can do.

You know, the reason I don't hit ignore is because these people clearly need somewhere to vent. They follow me around seeking attention from me. Hitting ignore means that I am hiding their comments as if I am not able to handle their insults, if there are any.

There is something about this topic that really upsets people.

They want to hear what they want to hear and when that doesn't happen, personal insults start flying. I can understand that. Because I am making them look deeper and alot of people don't want to do the work.

What if this happens to them? What if they have irreversible surgery and then find that they hate the result?

Or even more aggravating, what if they do it and fail? Stay fat or gain weight?

That idea makes people scared and angry. But that's great. The more people read this thread, the better so the more they post, the more my message gets out.

I don't "own" the thread, but I started it for a reason. I welcome all posts, bullying or not.

And yes, there is at least one post here that is quite aggressive and has a bullying tone.

I certainly won't lose sleep over it.

I agree that everyone is welcome to their opinion, and the more people resort to name calling, insults etc, the less intelligent they sound.

People don't have to be nice to me, but being civil is helpful.

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[GinaCampbell 434]

People have tried to help you and say the right things. I truly find you fascinating. Maybe I am honestly interested to know what you need to hear to make you feel as though you have met your objective. People don't have to agree with you, and they don't have to agree with me. I just don't get why you think you shouldn't respect any other point of view the way that you are insisting that others should respect yours. I admitted the fact that I made you feel disrespected, and yet you continue to criticize me and anyone who won't agree with you. I like a good discussion, because that is how I learn about people and experiences. I don't always say the exact right things in the exact right way, but I never intend to insult anyone the way that I have you. I just never encountered anyone quite like you, and I really am interested to know what you came here to accomplish. This will be my last comment out of respect for you and your point of view. I wish you well, and that is the honest truth. Sorry we couldn't seem to understand each other...

See, she finds me fascinating. She wants to know more about me. She keeps asking what my objective is, despite me repeating it for her again and again. She feels personally criticised by me. She thinks I felt disrespected by her.

All sounds quite personal, not about WLS at all.

My point exactly.

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[GinaCampbell 434]

She's a sick person. She's getting off on the attention. Let's not give her any more. Bet she responds within 30 seconds, because that's the way she rolls.

And I wonder what about me inspires your devoted following of me. What about me upsets you so much? Why are you engaging with such a "sick" person?

And you will give me more attention, you know you will.

And there is the playground statement. "Let's all ignore her, not play with her because I don't like her".

You just prove my point.

And don't hate me just because I am clever enough to post on BP more quickly than most. Being jealous of the way "I roll" (really, from a woman your age?) is only a complement.

Ask yourself, why are you on this thread? Hurling insults won't help your objective. Unless your objective is just being a mean girl.

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*compliment

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[More than this 116]

Incredible!! I have written my later posts to you trying to placate u. You pick it apart as well as others posts & slam us. You know what "Christian lady", you need to get off this site as you are nothing but mean & don't care about what anyone says, only about attacking a sentence or 2 that does not give the gist of what we are saying. I agree....stop you boohooing & get off this site, if you don't want anyone to say anything to u. You are exhausting & negative no matter what anyone says...& u can't be that busy as I look at all your posts on here & there r quite a few. I am going to do myself a favour & unsubscribe from yur post as I hope everyone else does. You may as well be talking to yourself as u don't READ what others are saying. Good luck with yourself.

[Babbs 14,681]

Or maybe people are tired of you starting or going into every thread complaining about how much you regret the surgery? We get it. You regret the surgery. Move on. What the hell can you do about it now??

And how short sighted does someone have to be to realize it's not always going to be this way? When you have a 2 year old child, do you say they are still going to be throwing tantrums and not be potty trained when they're 20? Of course not. Things change and progress. Just like with this surgery. Yes, there will be a time when you will be able to eat more. Yes, there will be a time when you can eat whatever you want without feeling like sh*t. Yes, there will be time when you can pretty much ignore the fact you've had surgery and do whatever you want again once you've healed up. Yes, even your fairly normal complications will get better with time. I barely even know I've had surgery now at 2 years out with the amounts I can eat. Yes, NORMAL amounts if I really work at it. I feel completely normal. You're frikken 9 weeks out. Give yourself time to heal up and you can move on with your life like nothing ever happened.

Jeez.

[DiNNDiNAA 0]

Anyone know how I can delete a post .. I started a thread and wanted to delete it and start a new thread ?

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[CowgirlJane 14,259]

When we write things on forums, it isn't just the original poster, or the responders who read it. I betcha there will be many lurkers who will read this thread and it's good that they can see various points of view. My remarks are targeted at those people who are trying to understand this surgery and if it is a good idea for them. It's a freaking scary proposition to have part of your stomach removed!

My personal experience as a sleever can be summarized like this:

• Preop - Terrified and anxious, I had to get short term medication to make it through the last week before surgery. The word "hot mess" comes to mind. It wasn't because I didn't want to be sleeved, it was because I had such a fear of the operation, such a fear of failing AGAIN (I was a failed band patient and there is no feeling of failure like failing after bariatric surgery)
• First weeks post op were very miserable and I was still fat. Struggle to get in enough Water, exhausted, anti-social, diarrea all that stuff. I never regretted it though because I knew this often happened and I just had to "muscle through it"
• Introducing solid food was another awful experience. I felt like I had to do it perfectly right since I was so desperate to succeed. I feared damaging my sleeve, I felt sick to my stomach, everything tasted weird, Water tasted like it had metal in it.... and I was still fat.
• The next few months were surreal. I didn't feel like myself and I can't even articulate why. While I got the hang of eating properly, it was disorienting for food to taste bad, to eat so little, to have food restrictions, eating FELT LIKE A CHORE. Then, I had an "ah ha" moment - this is the window of opportunity to change my relationship with food. Food is not recreation, it's nutrtion - novel concept for me! I often felt I would be happier just not eating, but I realized that is another form of disordered eating, so I took on the approach that food is like medicine - follow my surgeons and NUTs directions and take it on faith it would get better. Still fat, but down alot.
• By 3-4 months out, people were noticing the weight loss, I was feeling more myself emotionally, I was not as naseaous, I could tolerate a wider variety of food and it started tasting normal. I was in a good workout routine and loving that I could do more. Yes, still fat, but not nearly AS fat. I started thinking that amazing things MIGHT be possible.
• At around 8-9 months my appetite returned, my weight loss slowed and I was still about 40# from goal. I made a conscious decision to evaluate what was important to me and I got my butt back on track with good steady losses.
• At 14 months I made my goal of losing 150#. I could wear cute clothes, people didn't recognize me, I could eat pretty much anything (exceptions are rich ice cream gives me cramps and spicy food can irritate my tummy a bit)
• I am nearly 5 years post op and living a good life as a normal sized, active woman with a loving boyfriend. I am living a day to day life that I could only dream of. Many people dont know I had surgery - I eat small portions of very normal food. My kids are shocked when they see my before pix... but they tell me I changed inside too, not just the weight loss. I wear makeup, I love to dress up, go out, social butterfly all that.

Life is pretty damn good and I am thankful for the help of the sleeve to get me here.

[PixTheCakeDestroyer 31]

Wait, 9 weeks out and this much regret? You are putting a whole bunch of stock in what is just a small adjustment period.

Sad that in two years you didn't take the time to learn that the first 6 months are an adjustment, and then generally things go back to normal.

I'm 5 years out, I eat quickly, I drink coffee (and tea), I eat meat and salad, I've gotten used to not drinking with my meals and learned that if I want results I have to approach life a certain way.

Seems like you did a lot of "research" and very little listining.

And I died, twice, from complications from my Lap Band, had a feeding tube for months, still have residual issues.

You may have been cleared for surgery, but you were obviously in no way prepared.

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[LipstickLady 25,682]

And it's the vets that are the problem....