When and what to say to your boss

[Heatgirl03 41]

So I went to the surgeon today and attended the seminar and spoke to the Surgeon. I have to do 4 months of dieting with the NUT and then they will process with my insurance. I now have a lot of appointments (blood work, EKG). I told my manager I was going to a cardiologist appointment because I don't want anyone knowing at work. So when do I sit her down to let her know about this upcoming surgery? How do I tell her? I don't want her to know that I lied to her. I need to take at least 2 weeks off and I just don't know what to do?? Any advice would be great (Her and I are close, but I just think she will try to talk me out of it)

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[chycky 671]

I would not feel you need to explain your surgery. You will have cardio appt most likely. I am not one to bring my personal in. I did my medical appts because I had doctors appointments. When came time for surgery. I just said I have a minor surgery and will need to be off one week and work from home the next. I was not asked to explain although there was some light prodding.

It is not appropriate for employer to pry and if they do ask or find out and treat you any differently that could pose problem for them if you formally complain.

But if you work for very small employer your protections could be less and pressure higher to share. I would just say having some stomach issues and Doctor doing a hernia repair and that you will have significant dietary changes for healing and prevention but all will be fine.

[NewAdventure2016 131]

I'm kind of in the same boat. I really don't want to tell anyone except my family. I don't want to lie but I also don't want to have all those discussions where everyone either tries to tell me I don't need it or tells me all the WLS horror stories. I've done my research, I know this is a right choice for me and I don't want to spend hours depending my decision. I can only swing 1 week off, so hopefully at my age, I can recover enough in 7 days.

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[Heatgirl03 41]

That is great information and thank you so much! I will definitely go with the hernia repair! I'm just a very private person and I just don't want the entire company knowing my personal business!

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[NewAdventure2016 131]

Keep in mind that if you are required to fill out FMLA paperwork, some of this information will be on that paperwork and at least HR will know.

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[amyflores 23]

If it's personal "it's personal"!i wouldn't say anything more

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[Heatgirl03 41]

How will I know if I need FMLA? I work in an office and I will request to be off for 2 weeks.

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[beautiful_alarms 12]

You also could probably get away with telling people that you're having your gallbladder removed - typically it's a laparoscopic surgery with dietary restrictions afterward - and when I had mine out, I took 2 weeks off from work. Anyway, ultimately, it's no one's business, right? I can't ever keep anything to myself so I've been telling everyone. Only one person has said something like "oh you don't need that" and I just politely said that my health care providers disagree and moved the conversation on to other things.

[SweetPotato 142]

I literally just told them I was taking a week off for medical reasons. That's it. As a former HR professional, I know they can't ask for too much more info and I didn't feel comfortable disclosing,

[chycky 671]

You can get a letter from surgeon if required for your sick leave but that would be highly unusual and I don't think you would have to include details of what surgery.

Fmla only comes in if you have no leave available to use. That means you have no vaca or sick but use Fmla to keep job. And do leave without pay. It would be unusual unless you are hourly with no leave available.

Be careful with gal bladder excuse because you might have that actually happen. You can have more than one hernia but only one gal bladder emergency!

[Dinks97420 52]

Make sure you do fmla. It will protect your job if something goes wrong and you need to be off work for a longer period of time. Minimum days off is 3 for the medical reason to qualify. The doc will need to fill out paperwork

[Heatgirl03 41]

Thank You all! I will most likely do FMLA just in case. I do have vacation and sick time but not for 2 weeks. I also have short term disability. So I guess if I need it, I will use it. Thanks again for all of your input. I really appreciate it

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[NewAdventure2016 131]

You can get a letter from surgeon if required for your sick leave but that would be highly unusual and I don't think you would have to include details of what surgery.

Fmla only comes in if you have no leave available to use. That means you have no vaca or sick but use Fmla to keep job. And do leave without pay. It would be unusual unless you are hourly with no leave available.

Be careful with gal bladder excuse because you might have that actually happen. You can have more than one hernia but only one gal bladder emergency!

Our employees can utilize FMLA PAID (where they use their PTO but it counts toward FMLA) or FMLA UNPAID (which they use after 7 days) and then they revert to Short Term Disability. They are required to use 7 days of their PTO first though before STD kicks in. They are offered FMLA after 3 days medical leave but they are not required to accept it.

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[Heatgirl03 41]

I will definitely check into that! Thank You so much!!!

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