Surgery without telling anyone?

[Dub 9,922]

With a BMI of 35 I think that you can absolutely pull it off without being interrogated, lol.

If you were a 50+ BMI, then I think it'd be a different situation.

You are going to be making visible behavioral changes when you are post op.....they'll see that you eat smaller portions......and that you eat less junk food......and perhaps go low-carb. That should keep their curiosity from growing.

People lose large amounts of weight from low-carb diets every single day. Likely that they know such people and will assume you have joined their ranks.

[Cape Crooner 589]

I told 6 people a year ago and wish I'd only told my wife (if I was single, no one). The problem isn't "dumb things people say", it's the fact that by telling "just a few close friends and family", you never really know if your secret is safe.

As @@Dub says, once you drop a ton of weight people will start asking and before you know it, you're being less than honest with very close friends.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying keeping a health issue a secret is dishonest, but imagine how you'd feel if a long term friend discovered it from someone else?

Worse, most likely, you'd never find out they knew, but their opinion of your friendship could surely suffer!

Keep it a secret or tell everyone!

[Lema 236]

The only reason I would tell someone at work or school is if I could tell that they needed encouragement to go through the process themselves. Other than two friends who I know can keep the secret, everyone else can kiss my tiny tush. I don't owe anyone an explanation. "I am following a strict diet plan with the help of a nutritionist" is all they are getting out of me.

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[Beccabecca929 4]

My surgery is scheduled for July, and I've only told my mom and my best friend. Even my sister is judgemental, so i will tell her after the surgery.

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[byebyefat 262]

I didnt tell no one , I dont regret my surgery , Im a slow loser , I lost 61 pounds FOREVER , im a year post op and have no sagging skin , I think due to the slow lost but none the less , no one ever asked me if i had surgery and again I think it was due to my slow lost , but people did ask me how I lost weight and I would reply with , changed my eating habits , drank lots of Water and lots of walking , which was all true , best wishes to you

[ahotz 4]

@lynnediligaf - I am in agreement! My surgery date is in October and plan on telling no family or friends b/c it's def a personal and private experience!

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[Babylamb 8]

The only people I told were my siblings and parents. I only told 2 or 3 other people after I had already had the surgery. It really is nobody's business

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[hbrhonda 108]

With my LapBand I only told my husband and kids. It was so hard to keep "the secret". Almost as if I were lying by not telling anyone. One time my daughter slipped and said "she cant eat and drink together" I almost came unglued.

This time I shouted it from the roof tops I AM GETTING THE SLEEVE. Not hiding anything. Posting updates and pics on FB. Now I have a huge support system. Its a personal option that is yours to choose. Choose wisely grasshopper...

[mschelly2000 3]

I have not told many of my family members about the surgery. I live far away from my family so they don't know how large I had gotten. I only have one cousin who has seen me recently and she made comments like "If you get any bigger, you'll need a wheel chair". She's not skinny herself. My highest BMI was only 40ish but I had a lot of underlying health issues related to my weight. I did tell some of my coworkers and most know now because I've lost over 30lbs in the last 6 weeks and my eating habits have changed. I still get the whole "You weren't that big. You could have done it on your own" from some of them. Several are very supportive and tell me how great I look. I had over 100lbs to lose and couldn't do it on my own. Altering my stomach permanently was a huge decision but I don't regret it at all. My health is way more important that food any day. As for my family, they are a**holes and would have criticized me. I don't have any intention of telling them in the future either.

[AmberMarie86 18]

I am meeting with the surgeon next month and there are only a couple people that know. I haven't told my family or anyone. My husband and a lady at work who had RNY. People are so judgemental especially where I work. I don't know how I am going to keep it from them as I am only 5 ft and BMI is 43. I want this to be about me making myself better and not people judging or talking about me.

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[kitkattulsa 28]

I only told my husband and daughter. Not sure what to tell work why I'll be out 3 weeks tho

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[krissyleigh 30]

Hi everyone! I've recently been cleared for surgery (sleeve gastrectomy) and arranged a date of 26th September. Very excited! I'm 31, have a BMI of 35, and single. I've tried (and failed) to lose weight for the past 16 years. Same story as everyone else - I lose 20 lbs and put 30 back on.

I've not told anyone about the surgery, and I don't plan to. I just think that people will think I'm taking the easy way out. No one else in my family has any weight issues, and I know they just think I'm lazy for being so fat. I'm definitely going ahead with the surgery, but wanted to know if anyone else had done it without telling anyone? I just can't be bothered with them judging me!

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I'm 31 and bmi 38. I'm having my surgery Nov 2. I'm only telling 3 people.

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[Spectra13 25]

I was sleeved 9/19 I only told my fiancé, daughter and brother (because I had to). My father doesn't even know. I don't feel like you should tell anyone you don't want to. Personally, I didn't want to be judged like you mentioned. Also, I am afraid of failure and in turn, more judging. So keep it to yourself!

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[grnnbaret 18]

I'm the exact opposite but love the fact you can all keep your mouths quiet. I've communicated at work, which has helped with my time off and lots of support. I told my family and they are all concerned and supportive I listen to the medical staff but I personally need outside support to help keep me balanced. I wish I was as strong as you all and not tell people. Waiting on my surgery date.

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[sa913 1]

I'm 1 month post sleeve today, I only told my boyfriend. He went to the hospital with me and helped with stuff when we came home. It was a bit awkward though when my colleagues at work wanted to know why I was on sick leave for 3 weeks and I couldn't tell them.

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