Feeling fear

soaf9 · August 23, 2007

Hi all I hope someone else can tell me they started out like me. I have so much anxiety I am about 5 weeks out and until yesturday I could hardly eat anything. Now food is going down easy and I just over ate I had about 1 1/2 cup of chix, carrots, string Beans and squash that I made in the slow cooker.

I don't feel terrible just really full and when I bent down to put dishes away I got a throat full. But the real problem is my fear that something will go wrong, that I will PB ect or slip.

I am over focusing on everything going on inside me and am dying to drink Water to wash down this full feeling, I know I can't.

Am I going to be able to do this? The thought of getting a fill is filling me with fear. I want to be one of the smiling faces on this board that says "I love my band" But right now all I can say is I am afraid of my band.

Does it get easier? What is wrong with me?

Diane

Kat817 · August 23, 2007

Hi Diane, nothing is wrong with you. It is a definite period of adjustment. The food you ate---and with it coming up in your throat, yes you overate, but it sounds like nice smooth textured, easy to digest food. My best advice at this point would be to take a nice walk---remain upright! Give it an hour or so, and sip--it will help move it all through. It isn't like you ate a huge steak, or raw veggies, that take serious work to digest.

Just as with anything else, the longer you have the band, and work within it's boundaries the more natural it will seem.

The fill is not nearly as scary as it sounds!!! I encourage you to go slow and steady with them, not to push restriction super fast. It sounds like you still have fairly good restriction with just your band in place, or your food would have just moved on through. That is a good thing!!!

Hang out, read through different threads, even if you don't think they pertain to you so much, you will see similar feelings, expressed in different ways. Most of us were somewhat intimidated by this little silicon band that is supposed to change our lives. It is even in my opinion normal to occasionally step back and say wait I don't want my life changed! In reality I did want it changed, and the band did help to accomplish that. But I did not wake up from surgery and consider this band my best buddy, and never have any issues with it! I have had!!!

I have had 2 total PB's---threw it up, not pleasant in any way! They did teach me to chew!!!

Now, I am without a doubt one of the smiling faces, I do love my band, I love the control I now have. I love that not every waking minute is spent thinking of food. Even when I was not dieting, I was planning what goodie to eat, now I just don't worry about it. I fix something, call it supper, and off we go!!! Food is fuel---I do like it to taste good, but I no longer obssess over every savory mouthful.

Relax, and learn to enjoy the feeling of not wanting to eat all the time, enjoy the weight dropping. Do your best to abide by the band rules, and soon you too will be a smiling face I predict!!!

Kat