People and their big mouths

[myfatisnotaflaw 33]

So....here it goes..... i need to have a rant to people who understand.

I had my sleeve done 8 weeks ago... have lost 33lbs last time i checked.. haven't weighed myself in a while.. but i am sure I've lost more since..... 55lbs till i reach goal.

I was 209 when i last checked and an (Australian) size 14 which is quite loose on me... and i am 5'7" so i wouldn't say i am very big by the usual standards... i haven't told anyone other than my family about the surgery to avoid negativity.

So today we had a family get together and wore something i have not been able to fit into in a while.. i was feeling great, really proud of my progress and excited about finally being able to fit into my usual clothes.

One of my family members i have not seen since my first week post op... and this was the comment...

"What was the point of you getting surgery... you arent even skinny yet, what was the point of getting your stomach cut off if you are only going to lose so little in 8 weeks... in my eyes YOU ARE STILL FAT"

Omg.... really? The rest of my family were commenting that it's really starting to show and i am starting to look what i did before i gained weight after removing the band.

So, i basically said "i am not allowing you to belittle my hard work, i won't be subjected to your negativity and will not tolerate being put down" and left.

Why do people feel the need to say such stupid things..why can't they just keep their mouths shut!

It upset me... because i was finally getting my confidence and groove back

Let me tell you something baby girl...it sounfs like you got a hater on your hands. This person was probably jealous of you before your weight gain and now that you are working hars to get back to a size that makes YOU happy they probably feel threatened again. Dont you dare allow the ignorance of others to interfere with your progress and your success. Tell them to kiss your "still fat ass"! Jerks!

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@@KindaFamiliar

Thanks hun, its easier when i stranger does it... but when your own family members do it... it hurts so much more...

Mind you, this comment came from someone who is morbidly obese themselves,... so if anything they should understand!

See.....and this just confirmed what I said about them being jealous lol smh

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[hbrhonda 108]

Just "unfriended" someone today I have known since before my Lap Band in 2010. She got banded shortly after me and we were band buddies. Well I have been throwing the revision to sleeve idea around for 6 months and today she let me have it. "You should have just gone to the gym", "you're just trying to be your husbands trophy wife", "I cannot believe you went to Mexico for revision!". WTH I had surgery 4 days ago!!! Who does that? I am sorry you switched insurances lady and I am a cash patient. I am sorry that I went to Mexico and couldn't be in the same operating room on the same table with you. GET OVER IT. You'll get your sleeve soon enough but I will not be your sleeve buddie. Find a different chick. Rant over. Thanks for listening. I feel better.

[carlaw 82]

Sounds like a jealous self-righteous hussy! Like an old friend of mine said one time, consider the source.

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[NeedaBreak4Me 1,755]

Just "unfriended" someone today I have known since before my Lap Band in 2010. She got banded shortly after me and we were band buddies. Well I have been throwing the revision to sleeve idea around for 6 months and today she let me have it. "You should have just gone to the gym", "you're just trying to be your husbands trophy wife", "I cannot believe you went to Mexico for revision!". WTH I had surgery 4 days ago!!! Who does that? I am sorry you switched insurances lady and I am a cash patient. I am sorry that I went to Mexico and couldn't be in the same operating room on the same table with you. GET OVER IT. You'll get your sleeve soon enough but I will not be your sleeve buddie. Find a different chick. Rant over. Thanks for listening. I feel better.

What a biaaaaatch... sorry but she sounds like someone who is now wherr she belongs... unfriended... you don't need that kind of negativity in your life... keep doing you... and be the most fabulous you can be... and leave those horrible people at the door... ????

[smg 471]

I think we all know that words can certainly be hurtful, especially when they come from those who are supposed to be closest and most supportive of us. Comments as blatant as this one, however, make me smile a little because they stink of envy, IMHO.

Unless this person has always been a direct, pampas ass for as long as you've known them, then I would be willing to bet that it was said more from a place of envy than anything else. This may be a person who "must have the attention" and can't deal with anyone else getting any, or someone so insecure with themselves that they must project negativity on whoever they can for fear that their flaws are ever under the "spotlight".

I know that it's hard, but all I can say when hearing things like this is to smile...know that what you are doing is clearly effective, and be happy with your progress. People like this are certainly not worth getting upset over.

Consider this: There were several people at your party. All but one saw the progress and expressed their positive comments and support. Majority wins...stick with the majority

Stay positive, keep up the hard work and best of luck on your CONTINUED success!!

[composed 26]

I'm wondering... I volunteer as a mentor with a charity which supports victims of domestic abuse....What you describe as 'haters' and the verbal attacks which are attempts to demean and belittle are typical of the abusive mindset. It could be that the put-downs and criticisms are red flags of Narcissists /Sociopaths. These people enjoy cruelty for the sake of their own entertainment and go about their lives blaming and punishing, lying and generally causing confusion and distress. If you are not familiar with these mental conditions you might like to hop over to Amazon and find a book called 'The Sociopath Next Door' by Martha Stout and read the 'look inside' from the title "Imagine." Maybe it's this sort of crazy you are dealing with? No point sacrificing brain circuits to even process that verbal diahorrea. Any which way I think you handled it perfectly and I'm really happy for you. Go you!

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[NeedaBreak4Me 1,755]

@@composed

You hit the nail on the head... i have always truly felt that particular family member has some mental issues... they have no empathy for anyone... and seem to get off on the pain of other people, no verbal filter and literally never felt remorse when they have wronged anyone.

They have lied, cheated, stolen, physically abused people and has always been proud of it.. grrr

This is why i don't really speak to them, only when i "must" and it is unavoidable... hence why i only saw them 2 months after my surgery.... very toxic and negative person.. who needs that in their life... not me

[anewmee 16]

OMG. So freakin rude! I'm in australia too and would love a buddy as I will be having the op in the next couple of months.

[NeedaBreak4Me 1,755]

OMG. So freakin rude! I'm in australia too and would love a buddy as I will be having the op in the next couple of months.

Oh yay! Another aussie! There are a few of us on here...

@@KindaFamiliar @ @@aussiecosy

When are you having your surgery? What are you getting done?

[KindaFamiliar 3,867]

And we're quite popular as well @

[ready?set.go 39]

Yay another one here hahaha booking my surgery in shortly just got financial approval! Yay!!

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Edited July 4, 2016 by ready?set.go

[NeedaBreak4Me 1,755]

And we're quite popular as well @

You are missing a few adjectives... ie.. good looking, intelligent, funny, adorable, sweet, kind, witty, charming, charismatic, generous, awesome,... i could list all mine, but surely there isn't enough space on this post [emoji12]

[KindaFamiliar 3,867]

Awwwwwww...

Thanx @

Oh wait...

You weren't talking about me...

RUDE!!!

We're slowly taking over...

The Aussies are comin'!!!

[NeedaBreak4Me 1,755]

Yay another one here hahaha booking my surgery in shortly just got financial approval! Yay!!

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Oh sorry i missed you.... i know there is another one.. but i don't remember her username... argh.. old age

[NeedaBreak4Me 1,755]

@@KindaFamiliar

Of course i was talking about you.... I'm sure you have plenty of those traits.... but, my mummy tells me all the time i am just perfect... so i am gonna believe her damn it hahaha

*sigh* perfection is a curse lol