Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

The warning signs were all there...i was so stupid



Recommended Posts

Once again sorry for this post but i love the support here you guys are awesome.

My parents have been on vacation for the past week and a half so some evenings i was kind of lonely which left me thinking about things...mainly things with the ex husband

Looking back on the last 2 years I feel like an idiot. Why did I not leave the day I said I love you and he said he couldn't say it back. Why didn't I question things more when he got very possessive of his phone and wouldn't let me touch it. Why didn't I speak up when he went out with his female friends and didn't want me to come.

I still want to think he wad not being unfaithful, at least physically, but all the classic signs were there and I feel like an idiot for not leaving two years ago

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Don't beat yourself up over it! Most of us have looked back on relationships thinking the same things you are thinking. I know it's easier to say this, than actually do it, but you need to start moving on and let go of this. It's not doing you any good. My heart goes out to you, I've been in your situation before.

Sent from my iPad using the BariatricPal App

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

There is no disgrace in getting out of a mess. One-way relationships are a waste of time. I am glad you liberating yourself to go get some peace of mind.

There may be problems that arise with leaving, but sometimes these situations solve more problems than they cause.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

The best thing that ever happened to me was not marrying my first fiance. Her maturity level kept dropping and dropping and dropping. Finally I caught her cheating on me. I kicked her ass out and never looked back. I have been with my wife now since 2008 and I couldn't be happier! Get over this dirt bag and go find somebody that treats you like you deserve to be treated.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

You loved him and wanted it to work. keep moving forward and let go of the past. Make yourself a priority.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I know the feeling, but here is what I think about this topic. I think you are a better person because you REALLY tried, you were "all in". you picked wrong, but your attitude is right.

I had this conversation with my adult son who ended a 5 year relationship about a year or so after he should of. He told me that I had done the same thing, but we were RIGHT for sticking it out as long as we did.... I think you have nothing to be ashamed of/sorry for.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

We are human. We all have made mistakes. You were trying to make a marriage work. Forgive yourself and move on. Life goes on and it'll get better. Trust me, I've been where you are. Hugs.

Sent from my SM-G930P using the BariatricPal App

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Lizette1122

      Anyone had the TORe procedure? How did it go? How much weight did you loose? 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • LadyVeteran1

      Sleeve surgery is on April 14th.  I am counting the days!!  Can't wait!
      · 3 replies
      1. Brookie2shoes

        Me too girl!! Are you in the full liquid diet right now? It’s sooooo hard!

      2. LadyVeteran1

        Not yet. I was told I only have to do 24 hours of a liquid diet. But I have my pre-op tomorrow so I’m going to confirm if I need to do longer.

      3. buildabetteranna

        Your so close now! It's gonna be great :) Wishing you a speedy recovery and looking forward to seeing how it goes!

    • buildabetteranna

      Down 33 lbs and slightly stalled, but I'm gonna reevaluate and push through. I started back to work last week after 2 years of being disabled due to mental health as well as my weight. It's a great job and I'm just so happy to have this opportunity at a second chance at life. Hope everyone is having their best journey ❤️ Together, we got this!
      · 2 replies
      1. DaisyChainOz

        Great work Anna! Keep it up 😁

      2. buildabetteranna

        Thank you ❤️

    • Bashbee91

      Hey guys new to the process looking forward to this new life. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Bugg

      Hi everyone! I’m brand new here. I just went through all my pre-op requirements per my insurance company and now everything has been submitted and I’m just waiting for final approval and my surgery date. I’ve been doing research, watching YouTube videos, TikTok’s, ect.. trying to prepare my mind and what to expect so I’ll be ready for the surgery. I was so sure and so set and so ready and excited. However, now that I’ve done everything & it’s almost here, I am sooooooo scared! I know why I want it bc I’ve tried everything and I just don’t feel like I can lose weight by myself. I’m tired of being overweight my entire life. I’m miserable, but I keep psyching myself out afraid of GERD bc I know how that can be and I don’t want to have to get a bypass after already gaining the courage to even get VSG. I’m scared of complications like I’mgoing to regret doing it and be depressed that I didn’t just be more disciplined and try again to lose the weight on my own even sitting here typing this knowing in my mind i just can’t and don’t possess the discipline. I’m also afraid I won’t be able to handle the restrictions of the sleeve. What do I eat? I don’t know how to eat healthy really and don’t enjoy healthy food. I don’t know how to do this! I feel so defeated!Someone tell me they felt anything similar to this or am I not ready? I thought I was. I am so tired of being sick and tired and so tired of myself and so tired of being stuck and stuck in this body and somebody different on the outside from what I feel inside. I just want to ball up and cry.
      · 1 reply
      1. stevieoriole

        Am feeling this right now. My surgery date is 4/1. Sign the consent tomorrow. I feel like I overloaded myself with too much info, too many opinions. Got to the point where I was wondering if I should do this. Then I thought of my reasons for taking this step and that settled my nerves. Still get moments of doubt but am striving forward. Am just going to follow my book from the surgeon. Joined this because I was told by my dietician that I should do this for support

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×