Psychological Affect of the Surgery

[bchas 0]

Hi, those reading this.

I'm nineteen years old (I actually had my birthday a week ago today), and I'm seriously, seriously considering getting the sleeve. I'm not paying for the surgery myself, I'm getting help from both my parents, since my insurance doesn't cover the surgery.

I'm not sure what I weight right now because I've always been scared of the scale, but I know I weight around the 360s, and I'm almost 5'10 (my bmi is in the 50s). Currently, I don't have any physical health problems, such as diabeteies or high cholesterol, but I know I'm very close to having health problems. But I have definitely been affected by my weight psychologically with the way I view myself and how I view other people.

I've always been overweight, just like most of us here, since I was a little (around two years old). I was always bullied in school, which let to me never having many friends, and because I've always been insecure, I've never been able to do anything that put me out of my comfort zone, whether that be helping my mom in the garden or enjoying a roller coaster at Six Flags. And especially with friends, I can never tell when they're being actual friends and good people or just sarcastic and messing with the fat kid, which comes from being insecure about my weight.

I don't know what it's like to walk up a flight of stairs and not be out of breath. I don't know what it's like to walk in a room and not be the biggest person in the room. I went to a all-day festival a few weeks ago, and I had to sit out on two shows because I was too exhausted to walk across the park to the other stages.

So as you can tell, I have some deep-rooted insecurities that come from being obese, and my parents, who are paying for the surgery, are very concerned how this surgery will affect me psychologically. They want me to get the psych evaluation before the surgery (I guess to make sure that I'm ready for this life change), but I don't have or want to pay the money for this evaluation.

My question is, how have your insecurities, such as mine, gotten better, if they have? And what are your stories about your insecurities and overcoming them? I want to feel better about being in my own skin, but I'm afraid that because I've always been significantly overweight, my mindset won't change once I've started to loose the weight. In my case, would it be best to have the psych eval? And if I do, what are my chances of being denied the surgery?

Thank you so much for reading my sob story, and thanks ahead of time for your help and support!

[Inner Surfer Girl 12,015]

Welcome.

I probably have a completely different experience than you. I was sleeved April 20, 2015 at age 51, so I have had a lifetime of dealing with food issues and related psychological issues. I already had a lot of skills, knowledge, and experience in dealing with psychological issues.

I am a firm believer in utilizing every resource available to me.

Most good surgeons and most insurance companies will require a psych clearance before approving you for surgery.

I HIGHLY recommend that you seek counseling as you go through this process to address the concerns and issues you have brought up.

In addition, you will want to attend support group meetings.

You may also want to consider attending some recovery meetings such as Overeater's Anonymous (OA.org).

I also recommend that you read some books related to weight loss surgery as well as food addiction. Some good ones are: Eat it Up! by Connie Stapleton and When Food is Love by Geneen Roth.

Are you in college? If so, many colleges and universities have mental health services. They may not have people experienced in working with bariatric patients, but that may be a resource worth exploring.

Best of luck and keep us posted on how you are doing.

[KristenLe 5,979]

@@bchas First of all, congrats on taking this first step in getting healthy! A Psych Eval is important and it's likely you will be approved but I agree with ISG - you really will benefit from counseling pre-op and post-op. I strongly encourage you to get all of the tools available to you to start off on this journey right - and be successful! Surgery is for your body - but you also need to work on your mind. I asked for therapy during my Psych Eval and I'm really glad I did - I'm finding it very helpful! Best of luck! I'm 48 years old and wish I had done this when I was still young!

[aeightyeight 4]

I'm so glad you are considering different ways to improve your health!! good for you!

I am 27 years old, I was sleeved on May 9th. I tired easily as you do now. I felt limited and overlooked.

Post-op, I find that these first few weeks are a bit lonely for me. I would recommend having surgery in the warm summer months so that you can be as social and out going as possible during your recovery.

I was accustomed to networking and working 60 hours a week. Now I have to SLOW DOWN and stay home because I tire easily. The lack of sociability is challenging for me. I chose to believe I am sacrificing six weeks of comfort now to prepare for decades and decades of a life I can savor...

I would suggest having a priority in your life that can keep you inspired before surgery, during recovery and beyond such as college courses or Career endeavors. Don't allow "fixing obesity" to be a criteria for moving forward in your life today

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[gina171 626]

Since your parents are being supportive and generous enough to provide the funds so you can have this operation, how about you think of the psych eval as a way to give your parents a big thank you? They are willing to help you, and all they're asking is that you get the psych eval first. Sounds like a dream deal to me. Also sounds like they love and care for you a lot.

Your openness in your post also shows you to be a very self-aware and mature young woman, with solid reasons for wanting this. I think the psych eval will be no problem at all for you. Don't be afraid of failing it, or that someone (like the psychologist) is trying to keep this surgery away from you. You'll be fine. You might find its the best money you ever spent.

To be completely honest, your post is so reflective and well written, with insight and honesty....that I think you almost sound like someone who could BE a therapist or psychologist, or at the very least in a helping/healing profession. You've got a lot of heart, and a darn good brain, too.

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[SweetPotato 142]

Don't rule out therapy or an eval simply based on cost... many cities have low fee clinics (community clinics, as well as ones associated with graduate schools) and many psychologists and masters-level clinicians have sliding scales for their fees. Don't be afraid to ask.

[unique0782 30]

For me personally my mindset is still stuck at 365lbs even though im 7 months post op and 265lbs. Now im afraid of eating too much and the wrong foods because I feel like im going to gain weight I constantly weigh myself. Even though people tell me how much weight I have lost I dont c what they see I still see 365 when I look in the mirror. Im now going to start seeking counseling because my mindset is still stuck at 365.

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[finallyfree! 84]

Hi Bchas, this journey is all about the mind/emotions. It is because we have not been able to cope with events or reactions to life that we have eaten the pain away. Your body will become healthy with the weight loss and your confidence will increase BUT you will still have the issues which caused this food addiction. Some people swap addictions and go from food to alcohol for instance so you really need to seek help in addressing the triggers for your eating patterns. Your parents sound wonderful. It can be scary facing your issues but it can also be surprisingly easy to let go whe you face your demons. Eating became an overwhelming focus in my life, I still obsess that I am eating too much, it takes up time that could be spent living your life. Deal with it now honey, you have a wonderful future ahead of you.