Numb leading into surgery?

[Womanvsmirror 314]

I am starting to feel a little weird. since I am in a lot of support groups on fb, here, and real self, I am in contact with a lot of people having surgery. I read their topics, follow their story etc. For the most part a lot of people seem to have a moment anxiety or "freaking out" as we like to call it. And since I am a complete baby about something as simple as a needle , I thought I would be a ball of raw nerves. But nothing...not scared , not anxious, not sad, not happy , not nothing I think the only word to describe my emotional state is "meh". Maybe because I have prepared for all the things that are in my control. And from reading and long hours of research I have a grasp on the things I cant control and I'm just ready for them to happen so I can get passed it. Or maybe because I know that my will power alone has not been the champion I need it to be and with out this restriction good health, and a "normal" bmi will never be achieved in my adult life? I guess its one of those when you want something bad enough you are willing to endure anything.

If anyone was any input on this it would be greatly appreciated. I think I'm going crazy , because I'm not going crazy. Crazy right?

[KristenLe 5,979]

@@Womanvsmirror I think you'll probably get a little more nervous and anxious the days right before but I am kind of feeling the same way - it just feels like a long time before surgery that I'm just moving along and not getting my hopes up or getting nervous.

[Womanvsmirror 314]

I was thinking the same thing maybe over the weekend when I'm sitting home and everyone is out having Memorial Day barbecues and I have time to reflect and I'm not at work maybe and then but right now it's not

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[Bufflehead 6,358]

You may not be the "norm" but you are not alone. When I was heading up to surgery, people kept asking me if I was (1) super excited and happy or (2) really nervous and freaking out -- it seemed like everyone assumed I was one or the other, and I really wasn't. I was just kind of rolling with it. I explained it at one point as feeling like I had stepped on a train and it wasn't going to be stopping so I was just riding along.

[Womanvsmirror 314]

That's definitely a good explanation love the feeling like this thing is just happening

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[animallover1247 249]

I could have written that paragraph describing my own feeling so you are not crazy! I thought I would freak out closer to the date but I didn't. Not only that but the day of surgery I had to wait 9.5 hours to have the surgery so that would have been a perfect opportunity to freak out...but I didn't. For me, I was just at the point where I was DONE. I couldn't live my life another week, month or year like I was so yes, I didn't care what bad thing might happen to me, even if it was death (which I was not worried about happening).

My friend told me when she was being wheeled into surgery she was thinking to herself "all of this because I can't turn down a Big Mac."

You are not crazy

[Womanvsmirror 314]

I could have written that paragraph describing my own feeling so you are not crazy! I thought I would freak out closer to the date but I didn't. Not only that but the day of surgery I had to wait 9.5 hours to have the surgery so that would have been a perfect opportunity to freak out...but I didn't. For me, I was just at the point where I was DONE. I couldn't live my life another week, month or year like I was so yes, I didn't care what bad thing might happen to me, even if it was death (which I was not worried about happening).

My friend told me when she was being wheeled into surgery she was thinking to herself "all of this because I can't turn down a Big Mac."

You are not crazy

Can't turn down a Big Mac that's hilarious

That's definitely a good explanation love the feeling like this thing is just happening

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[ssflbelle 829]

No your not crazy. I felt extremely calm and as you and others expressed. Perhpas my being 60 had something to do with my emotions. I am glad I didn't have anyone ask me if I was excited or nerves, as it would have been very difficult to express how I felt. I also got taken earlier than expected as the medical records for the person before me were not complete so they took me first instead of second. Going earlier certainly helped as I think having to wait beyond my surgery time might have caused me to panic a bit as I am a punctual person. I was taken at 1 and was in my private room at 6. Had a very easy recovery period and feel this was due to my mind set.. Good luck with everything, I am sure you will do fine.

[Steph~L~16 168]

I was the exact same way even waiting to go into surgery. You are not crazy at all. For me I just took it that I had made the right decision.

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[missdeeAus 69]

I feel the same too. I normally stress about new situations so it's very weird for me not to be more panicked. I think I'm actually reading these forums to frighten myself so that I'll feel more worried. Lucky I have a psych app next week. Writing this does make me feel crazy.

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[Womanvsmirror 314]

Yeah I think I do the same thing every time I see your post about someone freaking out I rushed to read it

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[missdeeAus 69]

I think the only thing that really scares me is loose skin and that is just to far down the track to worry about.

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Maybe is good in sleeping soundly in the lead up?

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[PayItForward 207]

The only thing that I was afraid of was that the surgery would be cancelled for some reason. I followed my preop diet but I was afraid my liver would still not shrink enough. I had told my sister this before surgery. The first thing I remember after surgery is her telling me that the surgeon said my liver looked great and that he did do the surgery.

[Womanvsmirror 314]

I was just thinking this. I think the process is soo sensitive with the insurance I have my guard up. I cant really process this until I know its been done.

The only thing that I was afraid of was that the surgery would be cancelled for some reason. I followed my preop diet but I was afraid my liver would still not shrink enough. I had told my sister this before surgery. The first thing I remember after surgery is her telling me that the surgeon said my liver looked great and that he did do the surgery.

[Womanvsmirror 314]

Once I wake up and get the thumbs up, I might just break down.