Having second thoughts...help!

[NPR 11]

Hello,

Age 37

BMI 32.1

Surgery 5/27

I have high cholesterol and I am one point away from becoming a diabetic. Is this surgery right for me? I have tried diets on my own and Weight Watchers three times this past year and I just can't do it on my own. I try and try and i do good for a little while and then I don't. My knees have been starting to hurt a little more when I go for walks.

I am embarrassed about having this done and people finding out because of what they will say. Sigh...

I need guidance here - please.

Thank you!

[Harsha 168]

Don't base your decision on what others say. It's about YOU and what you want and how you feel. I have had many people tell me they don't think I need this surgery... well it's not about them and their opinion. I don't feel embarrassed in any way, this entire process is a lot harder than people think.

[Christinamo7 4,042]

don't worry about what other people think. you're going to be in your 40s soon, and one of the wonderful things that has happened to me as I have gotten older is I really don't give a d*mn about other people's opinions.

You're not a failure if you choose WLS, in fact I think you're a winner. if you had any other sort of disorder no one would judge a bit for choosing surgery to help correct it. why should obesity be any different?

[KristenLe 5,979]

@@NPR No one can guide you on this decision. Remember WLS is just the Tool to help you - but you have to change your lifestyle and eating habits in order to be successful. This is a major operation and you can't base whether to have it or not on what other's will think. What do you think?

[OKCPirate 5,323]

We have a right, and possibly a duty to correct our mistakes of the past. There is bankruptcy for those who blew it financially. There is divorce for bad relationship choices. And there is WLS for those of us who at some point made bad food decisions. Without these remedies, people would be forever punished for some bad decisions. These are tools. They don't free you from future responsibility. They just give you a new start.

AND IT AIN'T ANYONE'S BUSINESS

[MissMac 163]

Are you planning on using insurance? Those who cover it usually require a BMI of 40, or 35 with a couple of life threatening co-morbidities. There is always Mexico.

And I agree....the older I get, the less I care about a lot of stuff.

[jaxmom 644]

I can't agree more with the awesome posters above- and btw, these people know their stuff!!! I'm still a newbie (sleeve April 20th) but I can honestly tell you this:

I wake up every day thrilled with my decision. The only thing that makes me sad is that I didn't do it sooner. I had done every diet in the book several times. Losing was easy, but there was always the horrible regain.

I too had a lower BMI going in to surgery and am losing slower than some, but it's a great feeling knowing that those lbs may not come back. I had a knee replacement at 40 that never got 100% better. Guess what? It's finally getting better!!! I feel like I gave myself and my family a huge gift.

That being said, the sleeve is tool. It alone won't solve all your problems with diet. You need to commit to putting in the work in your mind. But you can do this!

As for other people's thoughts... Why even tell them? Read some of the great one liners for responding to people who ask too much. My personal favorite is the person who tells people they lost the weight through acupuncture and hypnosis. Awesome!

This is about YOU. Don't forget that and best of luck.

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[stevencornell69 107]

Statistically being above a 35 bmi for 5 years makes it nearly impossible to be back to a healthy weight (5% chance). This is the best choice I've ever made. I'm 2 months post op, down 48lbs, already had to buy new clothes, and I have exercised exactly twice! Don't hate me. I injured my ankle 5 days post op so I haven't been able to exercise. I'm not the poster child for following doctors orders. Yet it still works. Do it. First 2-3 weeks SUCK. After that you'll be happy.

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[Jasminelums 50]

@@NPR, I feel you 100%. I'm scheduled for surgery June 15th and I am freaking out. My mind keeps telling me why go through such a drastic and irreversible surgery only to gain it back?

See I've lose weight countless of times, looked amazing, felt awesome and healthy only to gain it back!!

In a way I am afraid of myself. I feel like as much as I want to succeed I will sabotage myself some way some how [emoji20]

I'd hate to regain to where I am now (265lbs).

Is gaining inevitable?

I also haven't told my family and won't because I fear they will be against this surgery.

[AmysShrinking 70]

I was sitting in the WL office months ago waiting for my first consult and a lady who seemed about 100 pounds heavier than me asked where I was in my WL journey. Shyly I said I was just starting and these were her words to me. "If I can give you any words of wisdom, know that I sat were you sit now and weighing about what you weigh. People told me I didn't need surgery and I was not that overweight. Here I sit today 100 pounds heavier and wished I'd listen to myself and not others. Follow your heart!" ... and so here I am at 39 bmi and I will be having surgery next week on June 3rd. Good luck with YOUR choice and best wishes!

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[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

OK, here are the facts as I understand them, about long-term WLS failure / success:

* Half of the people who have WLS are "successful long-term" -- that's defined as maintaining at least half of their weight loss (for 5 years).

* Half of the people who have WLS are "unsuccessful long-term" -- that's defined as gaining half of their weight lost or more, including regaining all the weight the lost.

Your long-term success is determined by the quality of your surgical procedures and your ability to develop a healthy new lifestyle and follow that lifestyle consistently.

Compare that to a 2% - 5% success rate for those who lose weight through diet and exercise.

So no, WLS does not come with a lifetime guarantee. However, I personally know people who are definite successes as defined above. Those include people who have maintained 100% of their weight loss or 90% or 80%.

Their lives are abundantly better.

I have lost to 135 pounds. My lifetime goal is to stay below 150 pounds (which would keep me in the "normal weight" BMI neighborhood. Of course, I'd love to stay at 135 pounds.

[OKCPirate 5,323]

@@AmysShrinking - Thanks for sharing that story. It was especially touching.

[AmysShrinking 70]

Thank you!

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[christiR 12]

I had a random person overhear my conversation about getting surgery and only a handful of people know... And she said why would u do that just eat off a salad plate. Really??? Really??? I said... If u haven't spent years duck taping your stomach to look skinny u have no right telling me what to do. Don't let people decide for you. They haven't walked a DAY in your shoes and couldn't probably folloe a day of the diet we face now!

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