msfrench68 3 Posted May 21, 2016 Ok , here is my delima my husband is very insecure and is already complaining about me losing weight before I've even had surgery. Has anyone else had this problem and how did you cope? Worried it may compromise my journey! Sent from my SM-G928V using the BariatricPal App Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lenoreholden 14 Posted May 21, 2016 Honey let nothing are no one come between your journey. Let your husband know u are doing this to save your life.This is your life and you the one has to live it. Take care i hope for the best for you Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Christinamo7 4,042 Posted May 21, 2016 hopefully it will be as easy as reassuring him that you are married to him no matter what your weight is. you may need couples counseling to deal with any unhealthy issues lurking below the surface, I suppose I might tell him, "do you think I'm only married to you because I am fat and have no other options? no. I chose you and will continue to choose you". I am almost at the weight I was when I married my husband. He is thrilled and delighted with my new health, energy and shape. but I worry what will happen as I move toward a normal BMI, as he has never dated girls who were not a little voluptuous. but, we will deal with it if he finds me less attractive. We dealt with it when I was heavier than he liked too. We've dealt with far bigger monsters than that. He was scared to death he was going to loose me to a stroke a couple of years ago and my health is just too important. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Read2016 658 Posted May 21, 2016 Just curious you say he is already insecure and you haven't even had surgery... What's causing him to be insecure now?... Sounds like this is something going on with him and maybe the way he views/interacts with life. Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Inner Surfer Girl 12,015 Posted May 21, 2016 Have you considered couples counseling? Therapy? Have you been including him on things like your nutrition classes, appointments? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
msfrench68 3 Posted May 22, 2016 Just curious you say he is already insecure and you haven't even had surgery... What's causing him to be insecure now?... Sounds like this is something going on with him and maybe the way he views/interacts with life. Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App He thinks I'm going to leave him after I loose weight. Sent from my SM-G928V using the BariatricPal App Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
msfrench68 3 Posted May 22, 2016 Have you considered couples counseling? Therapy? Have you been including him on things like your nutrition classes, appointments? Yes I have included him, but I do think counseling would be a good idea, thank you for your advice. Sent from my SM-G928V using the BariatricPal App Thank you all for your advice I really appreciate it, I have to be strong and I hope he will be a good supporter. Sent from my SM-G928V using the BariatricPal App Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Read2016 658 Posted May 22, 2016 It's hard to change people's thinking... I don't think some men do well adapting to new situations... Good luck on your journey Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
msfrench68 3 Posted May 22, 2016 That's the truth lol, thank you. Sent from my SM-G928V using the BariatricPal App Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jersey0601 99 Posted May 22, 2016 I had an amazing turnaround - 1 day Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
carlissa_RN 62 Posted May 22, 2016 Lol my husband has ALWAYS ENCOURAGED my to GAIN weight these past 23 years of marriage. He does NOT want me to get the surgery but not because he thinks I will leave him but because he is worried something will go wrong in surgery. Poor guy. He is so worried about me. I'm not!! I'm ready to start my new healthy life!! Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App Share this post Link to post Share on other sites