Question about Sabotaging

[sbg224 318]

I was just wondering why we sabotage ourselves. I know of course this is not for everyone, but I went to a support group and 6 out of 8 were feeling somewhat defeated and addicted to carbs again 1 was pre-op and 1 was only 2 months post op.

I was surprised but truthfully it made me feel not so alone. After being 6 months out, my doc said, "now that you can eat anything", and all of a sudden it was scary to know that I could now eat those carbs, I had been forbidden to eat the first 6 months. I knew there was no carb police, if I had indulged the first 6 months, but I really stuck to the program 98%.

Now I crave the carbs, crackers, bread, pretzels etc. The more you eat the more you want. We did this surgery to get healthy, yet we all seem to have something in common, that could put us right back where we started. I do see a psychologist, and she says it really does not matter what put us there in the first place, what is important is stopping the behavior now and moving forward. Just wondering how others are coping and doing, and how many of us have this in common.

[Freckles70 25]

I think we sabotage because carb addiction is real. I think the biggest advantage of this tool we've been given (vsg) is a chance to break that addiction cycle. I'm almost 2 wks post op and I'm dealing with a lot of head hunger and cravings. I want nothing more than a big handful of pretzels or tortilla chips with salsa. I haven't even come close to trying anything like that and I'm going to use this tool and my willpower to the greatest extent possible. For me, one of my hardest presurgery addictions to tackle was Diet Coke. Previously, I would quit for a week or two and then get sucked back in to a daily habit. Once I made the decision to proceed with surgery I quit the DC and all carbonated beverages to avoid triggering myself. I've had similar results cutting back on sugar in the past but crunchy carbs are my downfall.

[FrankyG 1,450]

The simple answer is that we are addicts. Just like an alcoholic, food is used to cover up and mask pain/sadness/anger and we've abused it and our bodies for so long, it becomes difficult to stop on our own. Surgery is one answer, but it does require hard work, and some people go into it with the mistaken belief that the surgery "fixes" you so that you can eat whatever you want without dieting, or without dealing with the psychological issues of why they got to this point in the first place.

I had issues with three different aspects:

1. I had no sense of Portion Control. I would eat every bite on my plate and go back for more almost every time.
2. I binge ate frequently. There was a definite loss of control sometimes - since I was using food as a comfort when I was sad/depressed. But no amount of food would ever fill the empty/sad space inside me. That was a big thing I needed to deal with in therapy.
3. I ate horrible things - junk food, fast food, high fat/salt/carbs. I ate good things too, but the amount and frequency I ate the awful stuff really cancelled out the good foods.

The only thing that the sleeve fixes permanently is the portion control, and even then it is possible to cheat yourself by eating soft foods like cake or ice cream that slide right through the sleeve. It provides a temporary fix as far as the ravenous hunger and the early days where you can't eat high sugar or fat without it causing you to feel sick, but that wears off.

After that, if a person hasn't committed to changing their eating habits and really their entire relationship with food (seeing it as a fuel source instead of using it as self-medication), then they are not taking this seriously enough and likely will fail.

I realized early on that it was on me to use the small amount of time to fix the other things wrong with my relationship with food. And it is hard work. But if you're not willing to put in the work, you need to see that you're throwing away the opportunity the sleeve gives you to get your life back, and that is really, really sad.

I get craving stuff that is on the "bad" list. The thing is, once you've achieved goal, you should be okay to indulge in things every once in a while. But they are very rare treats, and I look for healthy alternatives, like only eating low carb, whole wheat bread or adjusting my calories if I know I want to have a slice of cake for a special occasion. This is the way normal people eat. They do well 90% of the time so they can have little treats and not feel deprived

Edited May 22, 2016 by FrankiesGirl