Interference From Others

[cahollin 0]

I was all set to have the lap band on July 6th, and I let family talk me out of it. I work in a hospital that has a weight loss facility. Everything went wellgetting insurance approval,and the cost was going to be very reasonable due to me being an employee. My sister also works at this hospital as an RN, and harshly voiced her negative opinion against the dr performing the surgery, and also told everyone she knew (they also know me) in the hospital about the bad choice I was making. My husband also became extremely worried the night before my surgery due to friends influencing him. I therefore cancelled. Has anyone had such problems getting support from the people that mean the most?

[wclark1215 0]

I am really sorry this has happened to you. It makes me mad for you. This is YOUR choice - not your sisters or even your husbands. You deserve better.

If you have done your homework and believe that this is the right thing to do than do it.

I wish you luck.

Will

[cahollin 0]

Will,

Thank you for your support. Your comments help alot.

Carolyn

[littleroo1 0]

Carolyn,

I'm sure this is difficult for you. It's hard when we are not getting the help and support we would like. Will is right - the only validation we need is from ourselves. Not that it is easy....

If you are making a choice to put your health and wellbeing first, then other opinions should not matter.

[Dina69 0]

Im truely sorry to here this!!! Support is one of the best things to have, but I too believe if this is something that you want to do! By god, do it.. I do have the support and am very fortunate to have it..Best of luck to you in your endevor!!! Go with your gut!! I dont regret it one bit..

[SunKissedinCali 0]

The only person supporting me is my sister. I totally understand. I have been trying to do this for years but my friends and family seem so negative about it (my mother like your sister has told everybody about it and I didn't want to tell the world yet). Validation for what you're doing is a big thing but YOU know best. I hope everybody comes around for you and that it all works out. Good luck!

[iluvlongnecks 0]

It's all about what you want, yes it helps to have support from others, but I was prepared to do this with or without support because I wanted to do it for me and not them. I researched this :ranger: and thought about it for over a year before I made the final decision to start this journey.

I'm sorry to hear that you changed your mind and that you are now probably regretting it.....I know I would be, but then like I said....I'm doing this for me not them. :nervous

Just starting my journey with a orientation on Sept 11th. Have aready taken care of the blood work and waiting for the appt to get chest x-ray and EKG.....I will jump through what ever hoops they want me to in order get this band :biggrin1:

[FELICIA17 0]

My family tried to talk me out of it when I first hinted that I wanted to have it done, which had me second guessing myself. Then I realized that this is my choice and it's about ME, not them. I decided to have it done anyway and now everyone is all happy about my weight loss, when they were dead set against it at first. It's natural for everyone to be concerned, but at the end of the day the decision is yours. It's about your health, happiness and well-being.

[Hello Kittee 0]

Same thing happening here to me... Instead of support, getting grief. bottom line=it's my life and my body, *I* decide...NOT THEM. Hubby agrees with me.

I'm waiting on insurance approval now. They can go fly a kite, to put it nicely.

[gwhite 0]

Its so hard to not listen to what everyone is saying to you. After all these are the people that are supposed to love you no matter what. Maybe they are afraid that you are going to change after the weight loss? This is the time that you need to listen to yourself. If your deep down real self wants the surgery then go for it...we'll all be here to support you. If the deep down part of yourself doesn't want the surgery then it probably wasn't really meant for you....please take time and just listen to yourself. Ask yourself why are you doing this? For me it was because I was scared that my health would fail. I didn't care what my friends and family thought..sure I hoped they would be supportive but didn't rely on it.

Best wishes on your journey.

[Nettie 1]

I am afraid to tell my family that I want the lap band procedure done. My hubby supports me 100%. I do have to say I will choose to do it whether they support me or not. It is my life and it is me that lives with the ache's and pains from day to day of being obese. I want this for me!

[wendy645 1]

This is why, if at all possible, I'm not telling anyone but my mom, boyfriend of 9½ years, and best friend. And they all support me 110%. I don't think other people will, and to be honest, I don't feel like listening to their crap about it. I've researched this well and I'm sure you have too, so they can piss up a rope! We're doing this for us, not them!!

I hope you've sat quietly and thought about this long and hard... if it's something you really want to do, don't let anyone get in your way. This is a life-changing decision and you know who needs to make those?The owner of said life! YOU! :girl_hug:

At least you know you have tons of support here!!

[Big As Life 0]

no, I am very lucky...all of my family is so supportive...I didn't have any negative remarks made to me at all.....but....if I had, I wouldn't let them stop me...I am my own person....and I am an adult and I can make my own choices....I researched the surgery and I felt completely safe in having the procedure done..some people pop off about the surgery and they don't even know anything about it....maybe because they are jealous and maybe because they don't want to see you get thin...

[jazzygirl40 0]

I am so sorry that you are not receiving the support you need and even sorrier that you felt you had to cancel your surgery. Were you required to attend a seminar? If so did anyone go with you? I was required to attend a seminar for both the lap band and the bypass so that I could make an informed decision and then make my choice. I was told I could also attend some of the support group meetings and ask questions. Do they offer support group meetings there? If so maybe if you took your husband and sister with you it might help. Also you said your sister was negative about the doctor. Did she give you any valid reasons? And if they don't want you to have the surgery (although its not their choice), then what are they suggesting you do? I hope you reconsider. You will have alot of support here from beginning to end. You didn't mention friends. They make a good support system as well. One of mine went to the seminars with me and has been taking me to my appointments too! Take care and let us know how you're doing. Donna:car:

[Sreeves 56]

This is only my second time on this forum. I looked at it last night, and today I got a packet in the mail from one of the (fairly) local weight loss centers. I am sure I want this surgery, so now I am in the process of trying to figure out what to do first. I decided I want the band because my problem is more Portion Control than anything. I eat healthy foods-just way to much! I have been talking about this at work. I work in a hospital. One of my coworkers had the ancient stomach-stapling and has been vigorously trying to talk me out of surgery. I told her my reasons for wanting the lap band. She is not convinced. No biggie, but today my other coworker scoffed at my choice. She said if she really wanted to she could go on a diet and lose the weight without the surgery. Yippee for her. I told her I obviously can't because I am 40 years old and still fat. More fat than ever. and I have tried everything out there! I know this is right for me, but I am really surprised at the total lack of support for my decision. It really bothered me today, which is why I got on this board tonight. Funny this is the first thread that came up!

I feel better knowing that there is a lot of support here. I am obviously going to need it! :paranoid I saw my dr. today and she is going to put me in touch with someone that has has the gastric bypass and who works at the same hospital I do. Our insurance states that it will not cover weight-loss surgery, but since we are being required to join a wellness program by the end of the year if we want a raise next year, I am going to do whatever it takes to get them to pay. I mean, they are giving $500 to anyone who wants to quit smoking for aid in that. I already quit, so why can't they help me with MY health issue! I anticipate a fight but I am ready. I hope. :faint: