Scared out of my mind

[haleymarie 35]

My surgery is Monday the 9th and everyday that gets closer, the more freaked out I am. I've been so excited about this since October of last year and it's all I've wanted. I was so confident and sure this was it. Now with less then a week until surgery I am completely freaked! I don't want to never enjoy food again. I'm scared of surgery, of the pain. I'm scared it's going to be miserable afterwards. I'm scared of making a mistake. I'm just scared shitless. I know I want to be healthy, I want to be a normal weight, I want to be in control of my weight and eating habits. But right now I am petrified. I'm telling myself i haven't tried dieting hard enough, I'm telling myself this isn't what I want. God I just needed to rant. I feel like I'm losing it. I am so scared.

[2goldengirl 2,076]

Preop feelings like this are very, very, VERY common. Have a look over the boards and you'll see.

I don't know who told you you wouldn't enjoy food again after surgery. I am 7.5 weeks out and in every stage of my postop phases, I've found that I enjoyed some foods more than others, but I've always had foods that I enjoyed eating. The lovely thing is that I'm satisfied with so much less now!

Everyone experiences pain differently. Mine wasn't bad at all. The worse part was my larger incision for for the first four days or so. I never took anything stronger than plain Tylenol once I got home from the hospital.

Probably the best response to a post like this I've seen was one that reminded the poster that the decision to have surgery was made when they weren't in a full-on preop meltdown. You decided to have this surgery for sound reasons. Those reasons still exist. They're still true. The only thing that has changed is your perspective.

Miserable? Is there anything more miserable than facing the rest of your life obese? Yes, you may feel less than great for a couple weeks. Not everyone does. A healthier rest of your life is the reward.

[smgarsee 9]

I totally understand! October until now has been a journey in itself. My surgery day is Monday 5/9 as well. Maybe we can keep in touch. Good luck!

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[haleymarie 35]

Yes! If you want to add me on fbook go for it (: it's haley urbansky, as much support as we can get is key right now I guess =|

[kmorri 1,689]

My surgery is Monday the 16th and so far not freaking out.....and don't think I will, but we shall see. As my surgery date gets closer I'm trying to stay focused on more of the "distant" future rather than what's happening in a day or two or how I'll feel a few days after surgery.............I'm thinking about and imagining how skinny I may be 3 or 4 months post op!!....Try it, it may help you. You'll do great!!!

[Megall9 268]

I'm Monday May 9th as well. So far so good, I'm not freaking out. I've just been way too busy this week so far to let my brain gallop away with me. I've been falling into bed at night simply exhausted from the day, and from the liquid diet. I've even been too tired to read before bed and for me that's almost unheard of!

I know the anxiety is there though. I can feel it right below the surface at times. Yesterday my left eye wouldn't stop twitching and driving me insane, which is a sure sign of stress in me. I'm trying to keep my mind on the bigger picture. Before the pre op liquid diet started I went out for a "last meal" with some friends to my favourite pub and got the best burger in the house. It was super delicious, and I found myself sad that I won't be eating a whole one again. But that's alright, I will have one again in the future. Without a bun, and maybe cut into three or four meals. But I will have it again. And so will you. And we will be healthier and happier when we do!

[meaniey2k 31]

My surgery is tomorrow May 4th and I am a bit nervous but ready to get it done. I know it will be the best thing for me. You will be just fine.

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Edited May 3, 2016 by meaniey2k

[haleymarie 35]

Thanks guys! I know it'll be okay I just can't get over the after surgery. Then what happens those weeks your recovering.

[thorbjorn 1]

My surgery is Tuesday May 10th and I have been freaking out like crazy. This is my first surgery too! But the more I read on this forum the more comforted I am in knowing this is the best choice. I was feeling the same way a week ago when I began the pre op Protein shake diet, but I know we'll be over the hump soon! What also helps me is seeing what post op sleevers eat down the line!

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[camry2016 78]

I was totally on board with the surgery and then a couple days before had a meltdown/panic attack and almost cancelled. Not going to lie, the first few days I had buyers remorse. Had another meltdown around day 3/4 (because I wanted an orange, not broth). My husband just stood there and let me mourn my old life. Now I'm 11 days out and am adjusting much better to my new normal, and have almost zero incision pain at this point.

Everyone's journey is different so I can't say you'll have the same outcome as me, or other sleevers. However, each day it will get a little easier.

GOOD LUCK!

Edited May 3, 2016 by camry2016

[leahhindi 65]

@@haleymarie - when I read your post I got such a laugh! I, too, am scheduled for this Monday, May 9th and I just logged on because I'm scared shitless and was just going to post, "HELP! I'M SCARED SHITLESS!" -- great minds think alike.

Do you have/How are you doing on your pre-op diet? I am on a 2 week liquid diet and I am exhausted all day long bc I am waking up in the middle of the night with headaches and hunger pangs :-(

I know there is an end in sight and I have read repeatedly that these days leading up to surgery as well as the two days after are the worst and then it will get much easier. Fingers crossed!

Good luck to you!

[haleymarie 35]

@@leahhindi hahaha that's great ! My 2 week liquid diet is AWFUL! I'm sooo tired and sleep every chance I get. But I luckily don't wake up lol, I have this god awful pain on my left side that hurts so much I want to scream. I'm irritable and even more emotional then normal. I'm so scared for this

[leahhindi 65]

@@haleymarie - what does your diet consist of? My liquid diet includes Soups, broth, yogurt, Jello, shakes, unlimited steamed or raw vegetables (NO DRESSING OR SAUCES) and skim milk. Yesterday, I reinterpreted the diet to include thinned out sugar free pudding. :-) I added something called GENEPRO medical grade Protein. It has 30 grams of Protein in one tablespoon. It is odorless and tasteless and didn't even change the consistency of the pudding. I have been having a very difficult time getting down the shakes so wasn't taking in enough protein or calories and this is helping me tremendously. Thanks to this Protein powder, I met my calorie/protein requirements yesterday and I did not feel exhausted and nauseous. Now I am sure some experienced VSGers will tell you 100 reasons why this Protein Powder isn't "good enough" or "preferred" but right now, I have to get thru this and if a 60 calorie cup of thinned out protein 2x a day is getting in my protein requirements, I'm just peachy with it!

[haleymarie 35]

@leahhinidi, wow! I wish I had your preop diet! Mine is broth, sugar free Jello & Popsicles, and Atkins shakes. I wish more were approved with mine because like ylu I'm having a hard time with the shakes! I hate broth and get nauseous after having jello/Popsicles. I've only met my protien requirement twice. ): thank god you found something that works for you! I am so excited for my first week post op! I can have a Peanut Butter smoothie with bananas in it & it's never sounded so great before lol

[leahhindi 65]

@@haleymarie - I made the fatal error of weighing myself yesterday. It appears that after 11 days on the pre-op diet I have only lost 2 pounds. How is that possible??

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